David Edgar

I am delighted with my decision to spend my time doing something other than watch us attempt to survive.

Shelvey: Uh, Hollywood balls every 30 seconds. [throws ball] Everyone: Yes and ho! Ki Sung-yueng: Reduce the opponent threat through meticulous studying of their common decisions and devise a means to counter attack with minimal exposure of the channels through our midfield. Everyone except Bruce: Yes and ho! Bruce: Ki, Ki I want to hear new ideas ricocheting off your synapses like a pinball, not just a two year old slogan. (this one is for Thick of It purists)

What do we reckon Bruce is up to this second? a) studying tapes of the Norwich game b) eating a pie

Bruce knee jerk calling an extra training session on a Sunday warms my bones. It is the act of a species of manager long thought extinct at the highest level. And yet here we are. "And he made the players train on Sunday at the last minute. And all they did was shuttle runs and 2-touch 6-a-side."

Missed his lack of positional sense.

Arsenal at home? That's a paddlin. Norwich away? That's a paddlin. Spurs away? Oh, you better believe that's a paddlin!

MaYbE wE gOt CaUgHt Up In nOrWiCh'S fIrSt HoMe GaMe.

Still early to fully gloat, but I called this.

How many hundred million is invested in this Barcelona squad? So many flops.

Me gusta. Fully deserved.

Should be a free hit for shit like that.

Dembele having a stinker.

Yeah. This Barca is very disjointed. And a few players who aren't up to the standard.

Would like Jordi Alba to be curb stomped.

Threw a player on so he could make his debut at 0-0 on the opening day of the season against Arsenal ? Fucking fuck me, Steve Bruce you are special.

Chronicle headline: Actual quote from Bruce:

One injury doesn't mean a great deal.

Really should show some respect to the manager who gave him a Premier League career.

Pretty obvious now that Edwards is a patsy.

They're not that good. Should be a close game.

Speeding up our exit and reducing the number of games. Mike will be delighted.

I'm sure they'll strike a 315k deal with Etihad faucets or whatever to cover that.

Waste of time.

Edwards is amusingly silent today.