AsprillasShinPad

Really going to struggle without Ayoze's goals Not biting.

Just imagine. All of the juicy Lolcack that season ticket holders will be getting. Mmm, mmm, mmm.

Supporting this club is like walking into a sports shop that used to be decent, and sell proper sports equipment, but is now a s***** d*****. Cack Lolcack is one of those fluorescent orange tags that screams "70% off!" at you, but you know Lee Cooper stuff is fucking landfill, and you only wanted a new pair of running shoes.

Go after them all. Go after the players, the kitman, the reseptionist, the tea lady etc as well then? I reckon there's a lot of decent people employed by the club, but they are not the problem - their boss is and only him. What a melt So what are you going to do? Chin the tea lady? I doubt she's got a I heart MA tattoo under her apron.

On behalf of British Men, I would like to take this opportunity to Decline Steve 'Double Sausage and Chips' Brewce. Perhaps the Americans would like to take him? They haven't managed to build that wall yet...

Pay good money? To paraphrase Jimmy Carr talking about Rachael Riley, I'd crawl over broken glass just to suck the cock of the bloke who fed those two cunts to the gators.

:lol: :lol:

I'm up from 11 to 12 now.

Chuffed to bits we've got Brewce. Anything to lock that relegation in and take money out of the FCC's pocket is a winner for me.

We're no longer even that. We're a billboard for S***** D*****. The only players who will come here are mercenaries who know they wouldn't get a deal elsewhere. We haven't got the coaches, players or facilities to improve anyone. Just get the cheapest shite in, aim for 17th place, rinse and repeat. I hope they get double relegated just to stick it to the FCC.

Doesn't seem like a bad bloke, but he was utterly useless. Turning water into wine getting a fee him.

11?

Fuck me, don't use the g**vy word, man. They'll be over here from Ready to Groom, stinking the pace out again.

Evans cycles was shit before he purchased them. He was hardly going to get cyclists through the doors of a failing bike shop by selling even shitter bikes that you could get in Halfords or a supermarket.

Spot on. Bruce is irrelevant. We need to focus the bile directly at the FCB. But not from inside the ground, clearly.

I'm a bit surprised the club hasn't approached Andy Carroll. He's not going to get a contract anywhere else, and currently, NUFC are relying on a Championship level striker and Muto, who is almost completely unproven. Could be a marriage of convenience, especially if it gets a few more happy clappers to renew...

We need a crowd-funding campaign to buy Ashley an unlimited supply of bacon. For once, lets get high-cholesterol doing a good thing for humanity! Howay man, as if it isn't obvious that he's already built up a superhuman resistance to cholesterol, the absolute state of his piss tank. The horrible, horrible cunt.

I hope he oversees a double relegation TBH.

He's the business equivalent of slash and burn agriculture. We used to call Harry Redknapp football's wrecking ball, but Ashley makes him look like an amateur. His cynicism and lack of concern for anyone but himself is staggering. I think he's a genuine psychopath.

Excellent news. Hopefully his investments tank and he's forced to sell off NUFC to stay solvent. Maybe our best hope?

Cricket currently seems like the best bet. Ashes starts soon too. Then the Rugby World Cup. Why bother with paying a fortune to the FCB to stand amongst 52,000 suckers bewing some League One standard players (once the team has been further hollowed out) led by a the swashbuckling tactical genius that is Steve Brewce. Just chin it off. I will be...

Would have probably been first choice under Bruce ironically. I think he prefers the big bucks (and experiencing a culture closely tied to a facet of his identity) rather than be part of an aimless 'club'. If I were a footballer, I'd probably prefer gently tenderising my balls with a ball hammer than playing for this pile of shite.

User name checks out.

Probably won't get as low as Derby or the mutants records, as there are some other really shit teams in this league, but I don't think there's any doubt that we are the worst of a bad bunch at the minute. 25 points.

I'd have thought a phoenix club could only buy SJP if NUFC were liquidated. Not beyond the realms of possibility - NUFC becoming toxic a la MK Dons and a phoenix club taking the support away might force NUFC into financial trouble, but that would take a decade, minimum for that to happen. I think the FA changed the rules after the Wimbledon saga, so clubs can't relocate in a franchise fashion. I'm all up for a phoenix club, but it would take a generation to work, and would require a proper boycott by the happy clappers. Like happy clappers getting publicly shamed and stuff.