Teasy

Cisse's capable of some great things outside of the box from time to time, he's just not very consistent at it. Sometimes going from good to downright awful, Bent is just completely incapable of doing that. Some of the goals Cisse has scored for this club Bent wouldn't be able to do. So yeah i would say he's a poorer version of Cisse and not someone who would compliment him very well IMO. Not sure why this bit is relevant. He does score the odd fantastic goal (1 last season I can think of) but last season he missed so many easy chances in the box which Bent would probably have finished (or done better with). His one touch finishing in particular was dreadful for the most part and that's when he managed to stay onside. Right and the season before he was scoring everything he touched. His actual ability is somewhere in the middle of those two examples. He'll scores goals as a poacher, that's what his record suggests. But unlike Bent he can also produce something out of nothing. He doesn't need to be able to do that consistently to be far better at it than Bent because he simply can't do that, ever.

Apart from all the goals he's scored from outside the box you mean? Including a goal of the season and some goal of the month contenders.

Yeah, I just hope that's what he's thinking and what we're thinking. We offer him a deal as a squad player and he goes elsewhere. It'll be well worth seeing the usual "See we can't even compete with [insert team here]" bullshit here to not have Bent at the club.

He'll experience much worse than Cisse, because unlike Cisse he can't score goals without very good service. Personally I think he's worth £3m as backup, that's it, and even then its the wrong backup (we should have a plan B not a plan A-).

Its actually making me feel quite ill, just the thought of Darren Bent having a big role in the team Hope to god this is just Chronicle bullshit..

Moke Ashley probably. I'll be delighted if we get him. I'll bump this when he's our top scorer next May. I dread to think what I'll be watching every weakend if Bent ends up our top scorer. Much the same shit I had to watch last season I suppose.. If you watch the season review (don't) Cisse could have had 20 goals very, very easily so getting someone in who can finish regularly would be a huge improvement. It could be an improvement on goals maybe, though alternatively you could argue Cisse scored goals last season that Bent has never and will never be able to score. Also on form Cisse will score much more of the kind of clear cut chances he had last season. What it wouldn't be an improvement on is the horrendous style of play. In fact it'll just be going even further in that direction.

Moke Ashley probably. I'll be delighted if we get him. I'll bump this when he's our top scorer next May. I dread to think what I'll be watching every weakend if Bent ends up our top scorer. Much the same shit I had to watch last season I suppose just maybe with more goals..

He's not worth £4m.

Jesus they really do have a random transfer generator

I would be very surprised if we got him.

Ian's separating his anger at the current situation from his opinions on other issues, nowt wrong with that. By the way, we've finished higher than 5th before and signed less players under a different owner, so I doubt we're the only club to do it. Because if we are and we've done it twice under two different people then we need to get mulder and scully in here Disclaimer: I'm not defending Ashley for not building on our 5th place season.. just making that clear before I'm accused of it

All the other clubs don't give a fuck, obviously. Apart from the 11-12 Premier League clubs who haven't signed anyone yet you mean. Including the likes of Tottenham, those penny pinching bastards

Probably the two worst choices anyone could think of.

Yep, they undoubtedly want the best deal ahead of whether we sign players early or later. More and better deals are available late on which is why we sign players after July most seasons. The same reason why most clubs make their signings in July/August.

Ah I see, he didn't forget that its a waste of money to sign players before July, he just sometimes changes his mind on the issue, got it. Definitely strikes me as the indecisive type when it comes to money..

We signed players early in 2007-2008 and in the 2011-2012 seasons, but none of the others. The only logical explanation is that Ashley realised it was a waste of money in his first season. But then he forgot for 3 years, then Cabaye ect reminded him which is why we waited later last season and this season. The other theory is that its just not that easy to get the deals you want before July/August, which is why the massive majority of transfers for all clubs go through in those months. But that would just be crazy talk

Why did we sign Cabaye, Marveaux and Ba all in June then?, Ashley just decided not to try to save wages for a laugh one season?

€15m?, do Dortmund have a money off coupon or something?

The club can't force players to learn English, the club would be much better off trying to encourage them rather than trying to force them to do something that they could refuse to do and the club would be able to do nothing about it. Having a clause in their contracts could make a difference as they would then have signed to say they will learn the language but I don't know how enforceable it would be. We had a number of foreign workers at work and had massive problems communicating and we wanted to force them to learn English. We contacted an employment lawyer who we work with and they told us to back off and if communication was that important to us a company then we would learn their language. Yep once you've hired them you can't sack them for refusing to learn English. Which is ridiculous, if I refused to learn something required in my work I'd be sacked and wouldn't have a leg to stand on. The key is to not hire them in the first place if they can't speak English. Easier said than done for a Football club though.

I hear the Segunda Divisions quality like

Its hardly that black and white though, people are looking for a top class striker and think there might be better possibilities than Gignac (especially a the reported £12m), who's proven to be an average goal scorer even in the French league. I wouldn't turn my nose up at him for the right price, since I don't know enough about him as a player, but I see no problem in people having that view. As for Bent, not only is he about the worst option I can think of to play up front with Cisse he's also on his way down, headed to 30, and would apparently cost £8m with likely significant wages. If we're going to get him on the cheap (couple of million and a big wage cut) to replace Ameobi then fine. If we're looking at him as one of our main starters its fucking madness, so yeah I'll turn my nose up at that one.

You get 1000 pages on Newcastle per day on RTG

Plenty, plenty monies. Many, many monies? Considering the TV-deal was like a million trillion quadroolions, and Southampton are spending £50M, we should have a little money in our wallets at least. An increase of some £20m from the bottom club to some £40m for the league winners by some estimates. Enough to cover an empty stadium btw. The money we've just received/will soon receive is the last payment of the previous deal AFAIK (?). I think this coming season is when the new deal kicks in so we'd get the increased payment next summer. EDIT: Yep we received £45m for last season (2012-2013). http://www.premierleague.com/en-gb/news/news/2012-13/may/premier-league-total-broadcasting-payments-season-2012-13.html Next summer the team finishing last will get at least £60m (rather than the £39m the bottom team received for the 2012-2013 season).

What happened his first season or so then?, just a collective delusion? Clearly he can do a good job, but that's dependent on the job you ask him to do.

It happens often here. The "what have you done for me lately" mentality. Shearer in the past, Cisse last season, now him ? Ridiculous So many fickle people, everywhere though not just here.