DJ_NUFC

Yeah, I'm just aching to see what our full first team would look like and how they play together. I'm pretty sure it's gonna take a few months to get the Carvdew pheromones out of the dressing room and for us to look like a football team again. On the other hand, I'm concerned how far down the table we'll be come Christmas if we start the season off craply.

fuck off man

These pack of cunts haven't done shit, yet. The games so far have been fucking grim, Carver's stamp all over them.

We need one more proven CB. Man, MYM and Mbemba might've been something had MYM been given an extended run to adjust to this league (and not at RB).

Well done Bilbo Hey, the ladies like a man with a lower center of gravity. Don't need to be small for that Yep, just need a huge appetite and a few good stretch exercises for the neck before you begin.

Well done Bilbo Hey, the ladies like a man with a lower center of gravity.

I'm 5'8.

Someone mentions his fucking height again I'm going to challenge you to a bout of fisticuffs at the training ground, and subsequently hide, a la Carva.

It's mental because you watch and hear about other teams' trips to the U.S. and they're playing the top MLS teams in sold out stadiums. Including motherfucking Sunderland who's playing Toronto FC this week. Sunderland. Isn't that the point of pre-season? Yes, it's not meant to be competitive, but at least play against the top tier MLS sides, and not fucking USL, a league which is worse than the Championship, and still lose to them?!

Never has, when has he ever?

I agree that absolutely nothing has changed since end of last season tbh. Very, very worrisome. This is still entirely pardews and carvers team. Shitting bricks now going into the season. Not ONE positive?!

How did Satka lose that ball and give away the free kick?

This is shocking. This excuse that it's a friendly for us and our players don't wanna get injured doesn't fly, the other teams have been in the middle of their seasons, why would they want to get injured? All three teams we've played in the US so far have passed the ball better than us. And these were uber shit, second tier teams.

Perez goes past 3 players and then Gouffran can't control the fucking loose ball.

Why these long balls pumped up to our small forward?

Better finisher than Riviere (lol).

Suck my balls.

What.

I'm loving these Dear John type of travel diary entries sent via emails. I look forward to getting the dirt on how Willo hilariously slipped and broke his leg near the pool, rendering him unpickable for the rest of the year, and how Obertan one day simply kept running, a la Forrest Gump, and hasn't returned since.

That was the most nothing article I've ever read. It was like a bloke talking to you in a pub.

He's marra's with some of the French lads aye. Be a shame if he's on his bike given his low wages / decent back up option. He's well ahead of the likes of Colback and Tiote for me. I would have him as competition with Anita for who partners Wijnaldum at CM. This.

Dat Everton home game after Ba's departure, when everyone and their cat was certain Cisse would finally be in the middle. And boom, Cisse on the wing, Shola in the middle! Motherfucking Pardew. Never forgive, never forget.

Yup. Austin, Cisse and a panting, breathless De Jong, and we can splash the rest of the dosh on two CBs. One can only dream of such rationality at the club.

Allardyce had the stench of defeatism, a reputation for turgid football, and being an ugly fat fuck about him. Not to mention he proved his ineptitude with the transfers he brought in. He was always going to struggle in a club where all the fans want is a decent playing style. It's the one thing he's not really about. It was doomed from the beginning.