Shak

Certainly not going to be upset at this signing if it does go through, puts the vast majority of players to shame in terms of technique. Would have preferred someone who plays on the left though, I have to say. Will be disappointed if Barton doesn't stay on the right, he's been immense there.

He has to WHAT? How dare you offer your young footballers an education. On that topic, might I ask how in the hell Korea has managed to produce any competent professional footballers? Most of the poor bastards spend 12 hours a day in school it seems, really do feel for them sometimes.

Be right fucking creepy now if Jonas was found dead or something tomorrow.

Tend to agree with Decky, I'd much prefer to see us bring in a left winger to compete with Jonas rather than bring in a right winger like Bentley when we've got Barton and Routledge who can play there. Personally think Barton should play right wing full time, his crossing is quality and he gets much better use out of that engine of his playing from out there. His passing is a bit too hit and miss to really be a quality CM, which out wide isn't really an issue. Won't be upset to see Bentley come in if it happens though, as said it's always nice to have options.

Be better if they went down by just one goal surely? That way just a 2 or 3 goal defeat against us would allow them to stay up? Not that arsed about them potentially going down though, as long as we stay clear of the mess down there I'm happy. Don't think I'd celebrate anyone going down in any case, it really is fucking horrible and I wouldn't wish it on anyone (aside from Sunderland and possibly Man United of course.) They'll stay up anyway.

Aye, for a little guy he sure rose majestically for that header against Arsenal.

Hard to anything but encouraged thus far. Getting anything from City or Spurs was always going to be a bonus, to take 6 points from Wigan and West Ham is massive though. Fair play to him and long may it continue.

Nice to wake up to a 5-0 beating. Told you guys Best was amazing, Ireland (though he's English, really) ftw motherfuckers!!

Kiss my face.

Some truly shite quotes from Pardew in here like.

i could see barton in the middle that would put bentley out wide. don't agree with it but i could see it. I am still of the opinion that Nolan goes missing too often during important periods of the game and if it meant dropping him and seeing how that went then fair play for trying it. From what I have seen of Bentley the past few seasons I am not a huge fan however and can see him being another passenger that we feel we have to play because of his profile. barton in the middle drops far too deep though and we end up playing with two DM's, albeit with one that can pass over 20 yards. maybe with ben arfa and carroll up top to hold the ball that wouldnt be so bad, but it doesnt work with the options we've got up top currently. In our current style of play you're better off having Nolan alongside Tiote rather than Barton. We're very "direct" in our style (long ball merchants tbh) so when you're playing that way it makes more sense to have Nolan in the team because he'll get forward and score a few goals and get on the end of knockdowns from balls forward. Put someone like Ben Arfa (or anyone with any sort of class on the ball, really) up top alongside Carroll and then maybe there'd be some benefit to having Barton alongside Tiote, as he's far more willing to drop deep and bring the ball out from deep than Nolan is. Of course, the problem is that he's not fantastic in that role, his passing is a bit too hit and miss for him to really impose himself on a game, but if you're looking to build a better "footballing" side then you'd have Barton in the middle of Nolan. The problem with that at the moment is that we've nobody that fits the bill to play off Carroll and our wingers aren't exactly top class either. Personally think Barton has been a revelation out wide and I'd play him there full time if it were up to me. Then find someone better than Jonas to play on the left and a ball playing CM to play alongside Tiote and you'd have the makings of a useful front 6, IMO.

That just reads like you're an expert in having semen stuck in your throat, tbh.

Hope the interviewer immediately asked her to explain the offside rule.

Jesus

Still reckon his best position will be just off Carroll. No real defensive duties to worry about, just float about between the midfield and the frontman and find space to get at people. He'd be better on the right if you want to play him out wide. Would like to see us sign Keane on loan until the end of the year to give us another option at that spot while Ben Arfa gets back to 100%, then hopefully he can make the position his own next season.

Missed the first half. What happened?

Great three points, well done to the lads.

at the idea of buying three players and none of them being strikers.

I'd agree with Toon's Taylor, none of those players would be missed at all really. I'd keep Campbell though, personally. Problem with the others is that nobody is going to be daft enough to take Xisco or Smith on the wages they're on and Shola and Harper probably wouldn't agree to leave even if they weren't wanted anymore. Best and Perch you could probably move, due to the fact that they're young and probably on manageable wages.

The way he basically ignored the thread was quite disappointing. Could have been legendary stuff seeing him come up with dastardly schemes/slight of hand to try and fool us into believing he'd actually made good on the bet. Deserves the ban just for being such a poor sport about it all, tbh.

"Pardew – confident that he can squeeze cash out of owner Mike Ashley – is understood to have made striking reinforcements his priority at the turn of the year, although The Journal understands that Southampton striker Rickie Lambert is definitely not on his wish-list. He is also hunting for a winger and a defender, although again a link to Saints stopper José Fonte can be discounted."

Best leave it where it is. If we moved it closer to St. James' then Ashley would probably eat it, the fat cunt.

Clearly gonna wimp out on this. Ban until Nolan leaves the club is the fairest thing, I reckon.

Now go and lie down on the motorway Sam, ya fat tosser.

Cracking win after such a tough week. Fair play to the players, they could have folded and not bothered their arse and nobody could have really blamed them. But they gave it their all and completely deserved the win.