ScottishMagpie

whenever we play these 'bigger' teams away from home do we just ask them the week before "what's the screenplay for the weekend, how can we play our part in handing you three points? Keep our best player out the team, check! Play isolated forwards Check! Don't defend, Check! Allow you to score at will, Check! get a player sent off, Check!" Glad we could assist. Yours sincerely Alan Pardew, aged 9.5.

fucking cock sucker. That's it taylor....keep handing pardew his post match excuses.

Does that make him Newcastle's deadliest player this season?

This. Player that was injured then passed fit (presumably) to start then pulls up in the first half. couldn't write this stuff.

might as well take cisse and gouf off. useless having strikers if we don't fucking 'strike'!

U expect them to be pumped up for their yearly exhibition match against newcastle ladies?

Cisse is a Poacher pure and simple. If he doesn't get the service he'll look awful. I agree. What did Pardew think he would contribute in this set up?

Cisse is the player that should make way for the 70min shola substitution, pure fucking rank when we're up against it like tonight, but i'm sure bets have been suspended on it being gouf.

maybe the music in his head hasn't re-started yet.

keep telling myself how much city have spent, gulf in class etc. and then know it's gonna get blown out the water when crystal feckin palace rock up to the etihad had take 3 points off them.

Shola would have held him off.

cracking goal. kunts.

cheers ref!

did last season end?

oh go on, just let us have that one. pretty please!!!!!!

so this is what playing with wingers/wide men looks like......maybe we should try it.

The only way the will not get 5 is if they decided to slow it down in the 2nd half.

That shot from HBA will be Pardew's justifcation that the opening period was 'even'.

how often has he played there during pre-season? stupid decision. Dummett was doing great in that position.

at least we can rest in the knowledge we can make motherwell look ordinary.

HTL! Make us proud!

Yes. :'(

How the fuck is Obermong on the bench? Has he appeared at all in pre-season? Gosling would have made a far more sensible choice.

bye bye kebabs...wonder if pards has had any say in the matter or JK has just went over his head. Fucking ridiculous decision to put Jonas in the middle in his place.

Savage is complete bellend.