Raconteur

It’s a reasonable question to ask how the fuck this player came onto our radar. I don’t believe for a second that Steve Nickson and his team are aware of a player who (at time of writing) didn’t even have a fucking Wikipedia page. Even the most ambitious and positive reading is that Nobby or Tino heard about him and rang the club up. So, I have trouble believing this player was actively scouted and chosen as an enhancement to the squad. Why the fuck is he here, then?

Remember when Man U were linked for £40m? That concept seems absolutely bizarre watching him under Bruce...

Pretty sure where this notion of "inflated fee to beat the work permit" comes from, too. Not only was Ashley so jazzed on this guy, but he lost Rafa over it*, "put in 20m from his own pocket" and agreed to a massively inflated fee to ensure he could come. Sure * Okay, contributed to, was the final straw, was emblematic of their relationship. Whatever.

Maybe Klopp will swap Joelinton for Origi then?

FYP

The technique required for his finish against Sheff U was extraordinary

El Crisiso

Is it possible...l just bear with me... that the real Mike Ashley recently acquired control of that account?

Can't believe no one picked up on this. All this talk of suing the PL out of existence seems a bit silly; there is no way an organisation with the kind of liability exposure that the PL has doesn't have extensive legal insurance. The point that they may end up being the true wielders of power is an interesting one, and not to be discounted

Aye, comparing a 28yo international with a 22yo and 20yo still taking their first steps in the game - of course Hendrick looked better. That's the challenge both the Longstaff brother have to contend with - displacing the likes of these senior pros

Heard that in a Tony and Paulie chorus

Been watching The Sopranos and, in season 6, Phil Leotardo describes the five families of New York, and a glorified crew in Jersey. Seems to me that's what the "Top Six" is like at the moment - five top teams, and a sixth who is included for... reasons.

It was a completely surreal experience to watch the game, and then read the match thread afterwards - the criticism Hendrick got "live", when viewed after watching the whole match, was bizarre.

That's a pretty decent "reserve" lineup and is, as you say, enough to beat Blackburn (on paper, anyway...) Big Joe likely to start, and possibly Barlasar instead of Hendrick, but otherwise...

We had him for the Aussie broadcast too. Appalling

Ye gods, he'd fucking rock the green and white hoops

Yes, his goal - with its deft first touch, dip of the shoulder and rifle finish - was the mark of a Sunday League clogger...

I had the great misfortune of listening to Don Hutchison and his mate Joe Somebody, and they were praising Moyes for picking the likes of Noble, Fornals and Bowen ahead of those listed above, because they're inconsistent and can't be relied on. Mind-boggling punditry

To which the only response is “We’re as surprised as you are.” Four starts, last season...

Was pretty exciting to watch them link up and show they have a sound understanding already. They’re going to cause a lot of right backs headaches this year.

It was a really good debut, but this wasn’t the only time in the first half an imperfect touch let him down. He’s clearly a good player, and I was wondering if he had some rust to shake off. Gotta say I can sympathise with those who are reaching for “that damned smile” meme, too

Will be interesting to see Hayden and Hendrick in the middle together when we visit places like Anfield and Old Trafford. It would probably mean a sub-20% possession game, but I’d like to watch them battle against a good midfield.

Just checked the poll - seems I’m the only person who voted “1”. Think I’ve been too negative...

So, are we condemning Fulham on the back of that performance (and thus occupying one of the drop spots many seem to think we are destined for)?

BRING BACK THE HOSS! Jokes. Different player to the one we had...