Chris_R

This is odd. Coloccini stayed with us when we were relegated, odd that he'd want to leave to go to San Lorenzo just because we're doing badly when they themselves are doing just as badly and as likely, if not more likely, to be relegated themselves. So I don't believe that he wants to leave because of our league position. If he wants to leave because someone's ill, fine, leave and have some unpaid time off. Sort yourself out and come back, if possible. But if he just wants to leave, and there's no genuinely acceptable reason, then he can frankly get lost. If he walks out, Tevez his ass and fine him for every moment that he misses training or each game he's not available for. Do this every single week and hang onto his registration for the next 3.5 years or whatever's left. The problem here is the lack of concrete information. I don't know whether to sympathise with him or think he's a fucking cunt.

Personally I wouldn't read much if anything into Pardew's quotes. 1) He has to say that he impressed him during that game. Be rude not to after just signing him. 2) We all know that Pardew has no say in transfers. Thankfully. 3) Nobody on here could even remember this lad playing against us. Plastic fan you tbh. I can't bear to watch us without heavy drinking. I can't even contemplate it sober. Then it's hard to remember much at all in the morning, there's just a blurry smudge of a memory, a feeling of regret and a nasty taste in my mouth. Bit like shagging the missus really.

Personally I wouldn't read much if anything into Pardew's quotes. 1) He has to say that he impressed him during that game. Be rude not to after just signing him. 2) We all know that Pardew has no say in transfers. Thankfully. 3) Nobody on here could even remember this lad playing against us.

Pleased by this. Think a celebratory wank and a couple of cans are required now.

Properly chuckling away at "hoof roof". That video is excellent, and it's not like its clips from 30 different matches over a 5 year period, it seems to be highlights from just a couple of games which is always encouraging. Still, I'm sure Pardew will coach all flair out of him. Probably fine him a week's wage every time he moves more than 2 foot with the ball or passes it without it clearing half-way.

I live about 3 miles from Harry. I might go and park my car across his driveway so the cunt can't get out.

What if they're s***? Is it Pardew's fault that Jonas has never been able to cross or that Shola is closer to bedridden than professional athlete? Of course Jonas has never been able to cross. He's right footed and constantly played on the left. I, like you and everyone else on here, have no fucking idea if he crosses like Nobby Solano or Danny bloody Simpson until he's given an extended opportunity to demonstrate one way or the other. So yes, Pardew's fault. (And yes, I know he's played a game here or there on the right, I'm talking an extended period of time so a proper opinion could be formed)

Love how he waits to nearly 6pm then tells us not to expect anything today. Really George? Many announcements normally made in the late evening? Maybe you'd like to point out that the sun's gone down as well and try to pass that off as astute journalistic insight.

http://i48.tinypic.com/x6ac0j.jpg

99% of all football transfers are related to money. Everyone who comes here does so for more money. They're not coming here for the trophies or the weather ffs. OK, so we offered less than QPR on this one. Life's a bitch. Boo fucking hoo, move on.

Get him in tomorrow, just Ashley's style to try and get the club doctor to do 3 for the price of 2 on medicals.

They lose any credibility by valuing Danny Simpson at £4.8m

Or right wing. He loves a randomly allocated right-winger. And after all, we've trained with Williamson and Coloccini in defence for ages.

You're either about 12 years old or fucking retarded. Or both.

Have to agree with this. Last time I was almost (I repeat: Almost) pleased when we went down because we could get rid of some of the cancerous dross that was holding us back. If we went down this year it would be heartbreaking to see the likes of HBA, Krul, Cabaye, Cisse, Coloccini, Santon and Debuchy leave.

Total offer value: £1m

Knowing our luck he'd have won and doubled his contract to sixteen years.

What if Colo was convinced to stay by the news Pardew was gone? It's a distinct possibility in my mind. While Pardew is sat in the meeting "I can only afford to keep one of you on" etc. Knowing this club, we'd keep Pardew.

- Pardew doesn't choose the recruitments. He has no say whatsoever. And rightly so because Carr does an excellent job. - Why would a player want to play for Pardew in particular? His scintilating brand of attacking football? Don't make me spit my fucking coffee out. - As for being able to get a better manager, we could just promote the tea lady. At least she'd probably put the wingers on the right sides and know that Shola's shit. All your arguments for keeping Pardew are irrelevant.

I'd agree that most people are putting out a decent first XI, but I'm somewhat concerned that everyone keeps putting Cisse in goal.

Just anyone who understands the basic concept that left footed wingers should play on the left and right footed wingers on the right. ANYONE.

To be honest, all managers say they're not worried about their futures. Means nothing.

Jonas is a winger. He's right-footed. If he's to play anywhere (Questionable enough) he should play right wing to that he can get a half-way competent cross in to the strikers. Shola is a striker. He's also right-footed. If he's to play anywhere (and that is also questionable) it should be as a striker. But if he is to be pushed wide he should play on the left so that he can at least cut inside and shoot.

Yes we've had a bad run with injuries, but there's no way on Earth that this side, given the personnel he has had at his disposal, should be in the position they're in. That is Pardew's fault. Edit: Or perhaps it's the fans' fault. Yes, sack us.

He shouldn't even get until he gets home tonight. Sack the cunt, confiscate his company car and make him get the metro home so he can apologise personally to some of the poor fuckers who've put up with his atrocious brand of hoofball.