NEEJ

Allardyce's face is absolutely disgusting.

Tiote as captain.

Loads of wankers did it at Benicassim as well. Had loads of random lasses off their tits on MDMA singing the Toure song.

We should start a campaign to get him here for one last job.

My grandad was Clark's headteacher at Walkergate Primary. Mr Smith?

Played against Kazenga Lua Lua when he was at Benfield school. We used to tonk them 10-0 every time and he's just sit on the sidelines talking to his mates while the game was in play. Had his name written on his boots in pen as well, classy. Trained once with Sammy Ameobi when he was a lot smaller and playing for Walker Central and Brian Clark brought him along. Didn't do much.

Baines is so good going forward.

We've got Chiles on a treadmill in front of a green screen. Get in. How are ITV so bad at presenting football?

What an exciting footballer.

Man Utd are horrible.

The silver haired scrotum face lives to fight another day.

That the heavens for that. Great result. Looks like a blessing in disguise that I had to miss the second half.

If we'd got him in January we would've comfortably stayed up in the end. He's that good.

HOLY SHIT WHAT A MAN.

Sheeit son, what a goal.

What a goal. Fucking rights.

Suarez carrying his baby onto the pitch? Howay man.

Why is this reporter not asking Pardew why Anita/Ben Arfa aren't playing?

Bloke's a cretin.

At the point now where I hope Tiote gets sent to prison.

Hatti.

Well that's turned off now.

Fuck this.

Oh god.