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Buttertits’ defensive coaching paying dividends again as we don’t close down

I can taste the starch from Froggy’s potato-laden tears

Ah, the wifebeater’s there. How lovely

Used to laugh at the mackems fawning over Craig Gardner cos he could leather a football and nowt more. Ritchie’s exactly the same.

You supported them then, you said…

I’d be ashamed at having spent such a vast amount of money, you’re struggling to break down one of the poorest sides in the league.

Hope the little urchin holding up one of those cringey “can I have your shirt?” signs in the corner doesn’t get it and has a thoroughly miserable rest of the weekend anarl.

Woodman has to hold onto that, deflection or not. It’s all insufferable already.

He’s a thick cunt. There’s nothing more to it.

Manquillo in from nowhere and Hayden at the back. Buttertits hasn’t a fucking clue. Makes it up as he goes along

I see the ever-popular “it is what it is” soundbite has made numerous appearances this morning

Apologies if Giggs. Just seen this Wraith claims he “met” her ffs.

Absolutely creased this kissarse patsy is being stitched up by his employer. Serves him right.

Putting "The dream begins" in the tweet, man. They fucking know what they're doing. Utter shite, embarrassing PR guff.

Time to haul his fat arse off whatever chair or seat is able to contain his vast density, howk his hand down his training shorts and have a little scratch and waddle/squeeze himself out the door.

Poor Luke's been stitched up a treat, here. Unfortunately it's just going to make him stick up for his mate even more.

‘‘Twas Big Jow, not Gayle, which explains everything.

Anyone else feel physically sick when trying to comprehend how many calories this butter-titted, leathery-faced fucking cunt of human being must consume in a day?

Almiron producing a piece of magic? It just isn't gonna happen, Buttertits.

So fucking odd. Buttertits was smug as fuck after putting him in at the start of the 2019/20 season and then went completely cold. There must be some truth to Matty/both of them/their da calling saying something to him?

Absolutely nailed on Ward-Prowse is putting a free-kick top bins past Woodman. Also absolutely nailed on that the foul to which the free-kick was conceded will have been completely unnecessary - and avoidable if we were in any way competent at closing people down.

Pretty much called it by the sound of things.

Shite game, draw then out on pens as there's no extra time. We always lose shootouts anyway, but whichever cloggers will be on the pitch wouldn't be able to hit a cow's arse with a banjo.

Bye bye Ayoze!

A lot for him to mull over while enjoying his customary post-match Lurpak.