Pilko

If it was Oliver it would say "And, though his surname may simply be an anagram of Vurnon Anita, reports that he is a relative of United’s Dutch midfielder are wide of the mark."

Best fixture list I've seen for us in ages that. Doesn't feel like there's a nightmare stretch anywhere in it and the opening stretch of games is canny. Shocked we're playing Everton on a weekend twice as well.

I saw Magnay has gone to join Willo at MK Dons, but they've still not confirmed if Elliot is taking the manager's role for next season, have they? Obviously you'd expect he'd be allowed to continue with a play-off spot and a trophy but it's odd that they haven't made it clear yet. Still says "Interim Manager" on the website, pre season is about 3 weeks away.

Foden is infuriating for England. Particularly irritating when he absolutely mauls Newcastle twice a season, regularly. Didn't understand why we persevered with him second half. If you're going to sit in you need your pace on the flanks, Gordon/Eze/Bowen should have been introduced much sooner. Got an awful feeling he'll be like 2021 Mason Mount this tournament, play almost every minute and contribute nowt.

Great strike, shame for the Albanians.

Goals galore in this tournament, long may it continue.

That's a cracking goal

Seems a sensible signing.

Plump turning up at Sunderland would be fucking glorious please let that happen.

Darlow and Fernandez the survivors

He fits the bill of an Eddie Howe signing though. Bags of England youth caps Young PL experience Buying whilst they're either in a bit of a rut / transitional phase Massive potential and a high ceiling I think the penalty thing that happened last season has made everyone think he's a massive knob (I definitely did at the time) but I think the culture and the atmosphere at Chelsea currently is enough to frustrate anyone. Feels like he's in and out of the side and never gets a proper run of games even when he does well at Chelsea; wingers of all players probably need that run of starts to show their true worth (case in point, Anthony Gordon). Definitely think if Eddie got hold of Madueke, arm round him, gave him a consistent run of games and got him right he'd be mint for us.

Those must be those new shopping bags that magically take the shape of the person carrying them.

I don't think he'd take it purely because he seems to love being in and around the coaching environment every day, rather than the stop-start nature of international management. Do think he'll get the job one day mind you, just think (and hope) it isn't yet.

Tend to believe Orny Orny Orny the most.

Great news for us. And for Rangers fans.

Tell that to poor Tranquillo Barnetta sat in Jesmond Dene House, he's still waiting for his.

Give it a few hours and it'll be Leroy Rosenior.

I'm more pro-Sean than most on here, but at that fee we'd be best off taking it and wishing him well. You'd imagine he'd be a regular starter for them too.

I trust that anyone we've scouted and are willing to pay £16m for is some way better than Dubravka. It was like playing without a keeper for half a season.

Surely we should be taking a look at him in pre-season before we cash in as a minimum? £40m might end up being a steal for them for all we know. He's arguably done more than Gordon had when we paid a similar fee for him.

Good idea, if we have an injury crisis again we can harvest spare body parts from the useless bastard.

Whilst he had a bit of a rough first PL season, there's clearly bags of potential there and at 21 he's got years to fulfil it. £16m or thereabouts to me feels like a clever investment; Pope will be more than good enough for the next few years and if you've got this lad pushing him, developing, learning you may then have your PL keeper for god knows how many more years. If he doesn't quite make it, he's English and in and around that international setup, you probably get a fair chunk of the fee back. Pope - Trafford - Gillespie - U21 keeper is better than Pope - Dubravka - Karius - Gillespie for sure IMO.

Think you're being remarkably kind there. Get your point that they won't be going full tilt so they don't get injured pre-tournament, but we can definitely talk about why you had Palmer, Foden and Kane standing on each others toes in the 10 position all night, or the ridiculous inclusion of competition winner Mainoo in centre mid, or the general negative approach to the entire thing and fact we didn't lay a single glove on a team of no-marks.

1 shot on target in 95 minutes against Iceland fuck off Southgate you boring beige negative wanker. What a joke that was. Friendly or not it's a horrid performance and result.