Dr.Spaceman

With a sprinkle of Vince McMahon - a racist and allegedly probably maybe a paedo.

But we saw the exact opposite of this last summer... Bournemouth, Brentford, Brighton and even Sunderland have players who would walk into our "Champions League" squad.

Qualifying for Europe has little to no bearing on whether or not we can or can't sign decent players though. Losing one or two, fair enough but we're hardly Gandalf clinging onto a narrow, rickety bridge....are we?

Nah, its absolutely nailed on and we're going to spend £150 million on him and he's going to be shit. Just relegate us now.

Wtf

Tonali & Tino, we've known this for absolutely ages

One night and one more time, thanks for the memories, even though they weren't so great

Red and white boots. Disappointing.

Class craic at Gateshead today, completely outplayed Scunthorpe who actually did a Newcastle and looked better with only 10 men. If Rob Elliot is still there next season they will be in the play-offs.

Canny crowd today

2-0

Heed pel, red card

Dean arguably missed the most pen worthy challenge between the two as well.

If Trippier and Tino are both away and we don't sign a decent right back then we deserve everything we get. We've seemingly known about Tino for a while now and Tripps age was hardly a secret

We could always adopt a different approach and involve coaches more with that side of things. Better players will need the likes of them less, as useful as they are.

Surely it would either Azure, Copilot or some division rather than the conglomorate if it was a front of shirt sponsor? Which of them has the worst logo

Ah right, what's he done like, is he a wrongun or something?

Why, it's boring seeing Rangers or Celtic winning the league again

Aye, but he had a few bad games for us so that's that

That was a cracking deal for us

Who is making up shite like this

Jack Rudoni's voice

Should be a red card there as well. This game's had everything.

3-2, great game