D. Yimentov

100% He's still got his buttons on and he's still got a twinkle in his eye when he talks about us. Even he hasn't watched a game of football for a decade, it wouldn't matter. He's people person; a motivator; probably an entertainer third. 3 years of Kev running riot with Mandy's cheque book would set the place alight.

The Saudis will be trying to gain favour with Mike so that they can stockpile weapons in one of his warehouses for the next terrorist attack on European soil. Meanwhile, the Reuben brothers, who had connections to Stephen Paddock and Bohemian Grove, will be supplying Mike with under age French muff to sweeten the deal.

Since the Saudis have got their sceptre up America's hoop can't they just tell Mike that if he doesn't sell they'll disappear him off google.

Something about Niall talking to Louis van Gaal's wife tickles me. "Who is it?..... Tell him I'm out."

"Bruce left puzzled as Saudis opt for Simeone"

Dalglish signed him during his 18-month demolition job. Hamann had talent but the post-Keegan come down was just too depressing in and of itself to get excited about any player.

I don't really understand the idea that Amanda is winding Caulkin up. What would all of these super rich people stand to gain from being publically told to naff off by the sports direct man? I doubt Caulkin is that gullible either. It's obviously real.

Doesn't get enough mentions

It can't just be a long range shot. s**** players sometimes tank them in from 35 yards. It has to be something Stephen Carr can only do on Fifa. My vote goes to Ginola v Ferencvaros With honourable mentions to: Beardsley v Portsmouth Mcghee v Bradford Ben Arfa v Bolton Albert v Man U

Bin Salman’s royal lungs will pack in just as he takes the lid off the pen.

Cantona committed 3 red card offences in the 2nd half. - The kick at Albert - The studs first into Beardsley (1:24:25) - And the worst of the lot, the attemted stamp on Shearer over in the corner near their fans. Would've broke his ankle if he'd connected. (1:17:28) Those two tackles are f***ing atrocious.

I agree with this. He'll never have the elegance of Arfa or Ginola but he's more explosive than both of them. A different kind of dribbler. Also, he and Almiron are usually knackered after an hour because of Bruce's system.

Souness dropping Robert because of an interview he gave to the Chronicle the day before. Am(a)dy Faye missing a sitter late on. Few days later Robert was back inside for the hammering against Man Utd at Cardiff in the FA Cup. It was also a few days after the useless tosser had fallen out with Bellamy. We had Kieran Dyer up front. To make matters worse their back four had a combined age of 153. We would’ve torn them to shreds on the counter. As for the Marseille semi-final, Woodgate had Drogba in his pocket in the 1st leg. I was praying for Bobby to rest him before the 2nd leg but he played and the rest, as they say, is Andy O’Brien. Even more crushing was when we brought on Darren Ambrose to shake things up in the 2nd half. Think Bellamy was loaned out to Celtic months before Lisbon, unless they had another public spat. Yeah, my mistake. But I distinctly remember Kieron Dyer causing their cart horse defenders problems and wanting to weep.

Souness dropping Robert because of an interview he gave to the Chronicle the day before. Am(a)dy Faye missing a sitter late on. Few days later Robert was back inside for the hammering against Man Utd at Cardiff in the FA Cup. It was also a few days after the useless tosser had fallen out with Bellamy. We had Kieran Dyer up front. To make matters worse their back four had a combined age of 153. We would’ve torn them to shreds on the counter. As for the Marseille semi-final, Woodgate had Drogba in his pocket in the 1st leg. I was praying for Bobby to rest him before the 2nd leg but he played and the rest, as they say, is Andy O’Brien. Even more crushing was when we brought on Darren Ambrose to shake things up in the 2nd half.

Totally agree with this Ian. It even gets to the point now, where someone will pipe up with a bit of football talk, and I am instantly bored. Roll the eyes and just switch off. The whole thing just bores me rigid. People have been asking for this thread to be locked. It should be the open football thread open! Nothing else matters.

This. I think it'd be an idea to have everyone on here refer to us as SDFC. It'd be nice if we could get that snowball in motion.

Foregone Conclusion

"How does it feel there, Steve?" "How's the meal there, Steve?" Or was it Lee Ryder from under the table... "My knees are starting to hurt now, Steve."

That's the Beardsley shuffle. He was just doing that to get past you.

This is how Alan Pardew achieved 5th place with us. Defend and hope Ben Arfa or Cisse does something they shouldn't really be allowed to do. He quickly fell out with Hatem, Papisse awarded himself an onfield retirement and 5th place was never in sight again. These blokes are staggeringly incompetent. I would agree but with one added addition, Cabaye in central midfield. He was a massive plus at CM, something we lack badly right now. Exactly. Cabaye was so important to that team. And for one season I’d say he and Tiote were one of the best CM pairings in the league. I’d say it never looked as bad under Pardew as it does now, mainly because we had better players back then. Enrique, Coloccini, Jonas, Ba, Santon... We had some good players in that team but Alan used the same impotence inducing strategy as Bruce, leaving attacking matters to individual flair.

This is how Alan Pardew achieved 5th place with us. Defend and hope Ben Arfa or Cisse does something they shouldn't really be allowed to do. He quickly fell out with Hatem, Papisse awarded himself an onfield retirement and 5th place was never in sight again. These blokes are staggeringly incompetent.

Pity it hadn't properly kicked off with Saint Allan blaming Le Cabbage before the combat commenced.

Shola was "Ameebi" for a brief period - a pronunciation I'm sure was inspired by the word amoeba.

I'm starting to like him. He's slowly assuming that cult appeal that all semi-likeable blokes do after being comedically s*** for sustained period of time.

You're right. The perpetual decline is underway. The law of diminishing returns is in place re tickets, fakeover lies, hope etc. All the managers have control over is performances and these performances are far closer to relegation places than almighty 12th and that will surely balance itself out and likewise the clubs value. That price isn't going to get any higher but he's sadistic enough to take a hit on that to f**k the club up a while longer. A relegation - who would even care about coming back to the PL under this owner again?! Only one person benefits - him. So attendances would plummet in that event - even with freebies. The good news is it seems like it would take doing a sunderland or at least staying in the championship with a half empty stadium to get rid of him and for the penny to finally drop that the end product from this owner is misery and it must be stopped. I'd snap someones hands off for a couple seasons in the championship to get rid of this c**t. I love it when fans say "That'd be the last straw for me." Because 2 relegations, the defacement, neglect and renaming of the stadium, the besmirchment of club legends, 13 years of lies, 6 fakeovers, 2 fingers to the fans and a Pardew in a fucking pear tree wasn't enough.