Moose

Ramsdale was last summers token Bournemouth pal

Jee whizz, can we go one summer transfer window without signing one of Eddie's pals from Bournemouth? We can't plead PSR poverty and then spunk untold fortunes on the likes of Wissa, Elanga and Solanke. Don't tell me for one second that we have nobody at the club capable of identifying a younger, cheaper alternative from elsewhere?

Beyonce concerts and Jacksonville Jaguars games doing a lot of the heavy lifting there

New #1 GK Tripps/Schär/Krafth need replacing Tino probably off Tonali probably off Last chance to get some money for Willock Gordon may agitate for a move If a team offers us decent money for Woltemade, we'll have to consider it If anyone is offering any sum of legal tender for Elanga, rip their arm out their socket Frankfurt or someone else will likely come back in for Osula Get Wissa to fuck, time to leverage our Saudi connections for once The only players in our squad who are strictly not for sale should be Bruno, Hall, Miley All that plus every player we bring in needs to hit the ground running. Aside from all that, we're OK

The Egyptian Danny Welbeck

I dream of the day Marmoush and Welbeck fuck off put of the league

Hang on, why is Peter Bankes still employed?!

Oddly enough, Haaland isn't usually the problem for us, it's usually some random players having the game of his career against us. Expect Nunes or Rijnders to get a brace

Osula I think with Woltemade in CM

A rare evening on the bench for Burn

We all know too well what happens when you spend years accumulating an unbalanced squad filled with mediocre players with big egos on big salaries being led by weak, inept managers hired by greedy buffoons whose only concern is keeping the coffers topped up. You can tell that not a single one of those players gives a fuck about Spurs or the fans, they all signed thinking they were joining one of England's best clubs on the brink of building something special but the longer they spend there, the more they'll realise what a mickey mouse operation that whole club is and they'll already be lining up their next move. West Ham and Forest aren't much to write home about but they've got players in their squads with heart and character

Phenomenal

He looks like a bass player from a heavy metal band that had moderate success in 70's who goes to antique markets to buy WW2 medals

The Minnesota Vikings and Denver Broncos have won as many games in that stadium as Spurs have this season.

Just as they said upon the death of the unmarried and childless Queen Elizabeth I on March 24, 1603 This will be the end of Tudor.

Jee whizz, how much do the Cowboys charge for tickets and matchday tack? They only play about 8/9 homes a season!

They are us in both relegation seasons. I thought our players were too good to go down, I kept kidding myself that the likes of Owen, Viduka, Martins, Wijnaldum, Sissoko, Townsend etc would pull something out the bag or that our squad would get their shit together before it was too late. For Spurs, I'm half expecting Simons, Kolo Muani, Richarlison to pull a rabbit out the hat, but they haven't done all season, and they're not going to snap into life now. Very rarely does a rotten squad littered with mercenaries with no fight or heart manage to pull their shit together and dig themselves out of an unholy mess they got themselves into. If they stay up it'll be because West Ham or Forest imploded

Whoever the galaxy brain behind hiring Tudor was should be told to clear his desk as well, that hire was never going to work in a million years, even in his first press conference he looked sick of his life and basically admitted that they were gutless shitebags

Oh my days......this Spurs relegation is fucking happening isn't it!

Self awareness has never been their strong point has it?

You can see why someone would cry 'conspiracy' if the overall standard of officiating was decent but one team in particular was on the receiving end of shocking decisions and/or another team seemed to be favoured. But no, the standard of officiating is appalling and everyone in the league has been shafted multiple times this season. There is no conspiracy, it's sheer incompetence

Finishing everyone's left overs in the cafeteria? Driving the youth players to training? Organising the end of season meal?