BlueStar

Sure we can make a meme out of him, "Non Twat Footballer" "Wow, I was so hammered last night After training really hard" "Got to go to the police station To hand in this wallet I just found" "Hope the boss doesn't see me with this coke Better switch to fruit juice for the rest of the night." "I'm buying a hot pink jeep For my little cousin's Barbie collection" "Going to shoot at the work experience kid When I take him to Lazer Quest to thank him for putting the cones out" "Can't believe they put me on the bench I'm so honoured to have this opportunity."

Now Barton's gone, which of our player will they decide is a dispicable thug who should be barred from the game? You know, the polar opposite of their classy gentlemen who stamp on people's kidneys, fly in with leg breakers and run 25 yards to lie to the referee and linesman about the ball hitting their head when they know they handled it off the line?

This is going to get confusing, SSN will start running stories about how we're pushing for him to be released from jail.

Player prices may increase. Aye but I'd rather pay .1 more than transfer in someone who goes down with a 3 week injury If you're transferring out a player who's injured, say, who loads of people are going to want shot of and wanting to transfer in a player who is on form and loads of people are bringing in, then you could find the player you want goes up 0.1 or 0.2 and the player you want rid of goes down 0.1 or 0.2. Then suddenly you can't afford to make the swap without making another transfer as well to free up funds.

The Intoxiliser sounds like a weapon a super villain would use.

Ideally I'd like Ba and Best to start upfront (think they showed glimpses of the kind of chemistry you like to see between strikers against Fulham) with Sammy as an impact sub, probably for Ba, when he starts looking knackered. Sadly I don't think we'll get to put Shola and Lovenkrands largely out of the picture yet. Though at least it looks like Ranger is probably as far down the pecking order as it's possible to get by now.

The point being that the fact that Sunderland have a player that would be first choice for us doesn't really mean much when he'd rather fuck off and play in the UAE than stay in the prem if it meant having to play for Sunderland.

You don't. Gyan would walk into your team. Gyan would walk away from your team.

*Niall Quinn drinks 12 pints of Guinness, careers his tractor into the SoL, wiping out a row of disabled supporters and half of the first team, knocking over a supporting pillar and bringing the whole thing crashing down into a pile of rubble and broken pink seats, before staggering out of the drivers seat and vomiting on the statue of Bob Stokoe*

Incredible, waiting until the transfer window closes so you can't replace him, loan him out and say he's never coming back so you're sure to lose him for next to nothing or have him become your Xisco. And of course have beleaguered Brucie say the day before that he's staying. We might buy crouch? Fantastic, well done St Niall! Wait, we're not getting Crouch? Brilliant, genius work sir, amazing!

Think it's just that a roadside test on its own isn't enough to convict. If you fail the breath test, you get taken in for the blood test.

We should produce an instructional video starring Ranger and Sammy on the wrong way and the right way to deal with starting a premier league career as a young striker. Have them both at different sides of the stage, Sammy in his striped pajamas having a cup of cocoa and praying his thanks for his opportunity, then bring up the lights on ranger having a west side story style choreographed fight with his gang of backing dancers. Actually, wait, I want it to be a stage production, scrub the video idea.

Nile ranger Lifes Too Short To Worry About Things. 7 hours ago. Like turning up for training on time, your diet, your career, your future, other people's safety...

Magedia at it again, this time those bastards are showing the mackems leaving early. So unfair. http://www.readytogo.net/smb/showthread.php?t=627224

He thought they said a big dessert.

Gateshead is part of Greater Newcastle, just like places like Whitley Bay and even Sunderland, debatably. Quite possibly the biggest load of horseshite I've ever read, and there have been some contenders I can tell you. Sorry, been waiting to use that for a while - a lass at uni once asked "So is Sunderland in Greater Newcastle" and I quickly filed it away under "Suggestions likely to give a mackem a conniption fit."

Well, Dzeko not playing turns out OK with Rooney being my vice captain.

Mint Can't use apostrophes, can't use commas, can't spell Mackem, one on the right looks like he could be the redneck character in a Soul Plane sequel, racist shout-outs, "Sad geordies bastards", cheering on Bruce only to call him a Mag cunt further down the line... Couldn't be better.

Ah cannit wait fer this season leek, wuz gunna batta the Mags afta settin tha transfyr windeez alite, heep wuz get into eureep.

Wow, that angle showed just how many empty seats there are at the top. In a pub with it on. One of the few Mackems I know is sitting in the corner watching it as well, St Niall would be ashamed.

Was that Bardsley stamping on Mata's kidneys there? Would have been off if the ref had seen it, hope they look at it afterwards.

Mother fucker, he's my captain Oh well, Rooney vice captain. Let's just hope Dzeko doesn't come off the bench for the last 5 mins... My back 5 (keeper and four defenders) are now starters for Chelsea, Arsenal, Man U, Liverpool and Man City.

And I thought we were morons for ending up having to give away Barton. Imagine there's be the same backlash against "G¥an" as there was against "B£nt"

Sure enough