BlueStar

That's it keep your head up your arse while Joey gleefully wrecks the dressing room by ranting at the new players who have replaced his best mate Nolan. When he signs for Spurs you can sing his his name when he turns up at St James on the bench. I'm sure when these new players get pissed off as well they'll get little horns drawn on them in your Panini book an'all.

Yes, sold him, not let one of his best players go for free. And got about £6. Ferguson would do what was best for the club and that would be getting rid of Barton, for free if he had to. He fought to keep Rooney because he's one of the only players who he knows he can't replace for a number of reasons. Barton is a player we can't replace for a number of reasons, one being that the transfer window shuts in about a week and another being that there's no obvious replacement available who's in the bargain bin because they've got leprosy, they suffer from a rare medical condition where their feet have been replaced with hands, they're eleven years old, or they've fallen out with their club because of what they've said on twitter and are being allowed to leave on a free. Wait, there is one player like that, in exactly the situation we'd normally be rubbing our hands about, unfortunately it's Barton himself. We can replace Barton. He's had 1 good season in 4. As we've not tried to replace him so far, I'll wait and judge this particular replacement initiative on September 1st. Yeah, we can replace him. We could have replaced Carroll as well. We could replace Enrique. Unfortunately 'can' and 'will' are words which are very far apart at this club. That is true. I do expect a few bids to be put in to replacements however. Excellent, I can't wait to see our bid for Erdinc team up with our bid for Aaron Lennon.

Yes, sold him, not let one of his best players go for free. And got about £6. Ferguson would do what was best for the club and that would be getting rid of Barton, for free if he had to. He fought to keep Rooney because he's one of the only players who he knows he can't replace for a number of reasons. Barton is a player we can't replace for a number of reasons, one being that the transfer window shuts in about a week and another being that there's no obvious replacement available who's in the bargain bin because they've got leprosy, they suffer from a rare medical condition where their feet have been replaced with hands, they're eleven years old, or they've fallen out with their club because of what they've said on twitter and are being allowed to leave on a free. Wait, there is one player like that, in exactly the situation we'd normally be rubbing our hands about, unfortunately it's Barton himself. We can replace Barton. He's had 1 good season in 4. As we've not tried to replace him so far, I'll wait and judge this particular replacement initiative on September 1st. Yeah, we can replace him. We could have replaced Carroll as well. We could replace Enrique. Unfortunately 'can' and 'will' are words which are very far apart at this club.

Yes, sold him, not let one of his best players go for free. And got about £6. Ferguson would do what was best for the club and that would be getting rid of Barton, for free if he had to. He fought to keep Rooney because he's one of the only players who he knows he can't replace for a number of reasons. Barton is a player we can't replace for a number of reasons, one being that the transfer window shuts in about a week and another being that there's no obvious replacement available who's in the bargain bin because they've got leprosy, they suffer from a rare medical condition where their feet have been replaced with hands, they're eleven years old, or they've fallen out with their club because of what they've said on twitter and are being allowed to leave on a free. Wait, there is one player like that, in exactly the situation we'd normally be rubbing our hands about, unfortunately it's Barton himself.

Mike and Derek could kidnap Alan Shearer and Robert Lee, roll them up in a carpet and throw them off a bridge live on NUFCTV and some people would decide that it must have been justified, they were loose cannons and disruptive influences and they were shit anyway. It's like being in North Korea, anyone who is punished must have been a subversive traitor who hates the club and wants to destroy it from within.

Most clubs don't have a loose cannon like Joey Barton in their team, surrounded in controversy all-year-round. Most clubs don't have this pair of morons in charge, and if they did you'd suddenly find there's a lot of "loose cannons" in your squad who won't put up with what they're doing in silence.

As I've already said, I think if Mike and Derek were at any other club the players would do the same - ie at least a handful of them would air their grievances about working at a club run by incompetents. And don't think it's just a prima donna footballer thing, I think if you were at any organisation that employed 25 of the top 500 or so of their profession in the country and started dicking them about and ruining the company I think you'd find pockets of open dissent in the ranks.

Sounds like we would have released him there and then in a huff if it hadn't have meant paying up his contract.

In any premier league squad, 25 young, rich, famous and confident blokes who are at the very highest level of their profession, you'll have at least a handful of people that would happily publicly moan about it if their bosses were such utter morons, ran the club in such an unprofessional way and fucked their playing staff about. Put Mike and Derek at the top of any club in the Premier League and you'll quickly find that the more outspoken and social network savvy in the squad are airing their grievances. It's not just that we've been unlucky enough to have particularly impudent players in the form of Nolan, Jose, Barton, Routledge... Means we have to narrow our transfer targets even further to timid and humble types or Scholes style private players, which considering we're already aiming for people that are on the cheap because they come with some kind of undesirable baggage is pretty limiting.

Are there any owners in the Premier League which are worse? Blackburn's guys are off to a shaky start but they've certainly not managed to make as many obvious utter fuck ups and completely humiliate the fans of their club a much as our lot.

("You're not singing any more") Where's the Carroll, Where's the Carroll, Where's the Carroll money gone? Where's the Carroll money gone? Ashley is a muppet, Pardew is his puppet Na-na-na-na Na-na-na-na

And we needed them in before we announced anyone could take one of our decent players for nowt. A bit like when we went into a transfer window needing a striker to play alongside Carroll and came out of it without Carroll. Then at the end of the transfer window, when the only place we didn't need players was midfield, made a bid for N'Zogbia. And then next transfer window, when we'd sold a midfielder, needed N'Zogbia, he seemed to want to come and Wigan announced they were selling him, we sat on our hands and let Villa buy him. I expect a last minute bid for Kasper Schmeichel to be refused to round off our dealings this window.

But he posts stuff on twitter! TWITTER!

If he stays he'll be like another new transfer.

Fund Barton's replacement We haven't been able or willing to get Carroll's replacement with 8 months and £35m, what makes you think we're going to replace Barton? Our transfer strategy is based on who's available on the cheap and might go up in value, if we're amazingly lucky that might happen to be a Barton style player but it could just as easily be a keeper.

If we're justifying getting rid of him because he's a cunt we probably should have done it when he was going to jail for drunken brawls rather than after he's not touched a drink for years and sits around posting Nietzsche quotes and the occasional moan about the way the club is run on twitter.

Do people really think we'll have a new left-back? How long have we been trying to get a striker for, and we're going to find an adequate left back in however many days we have left after we sell Jose?

I wonder how far into the season, if ever, we'll first field that 11.

What's New Leftback like on FM? Can't find him on Youtube.

why? Can't pass, can't take corners, can't take free-kicks. Gobs off all day long on Twitter, and disputes the managers decisions. Previously convicted of behaviour such as stabbing cigars in teammates eyes & punching people on the training ground. Why would you? Should have gone to Specsavers tbh. It's the kind of revisionist history that happens whenever someone leaves.

Not one like ours, no.

Aye, righto I'm not sure we could get a thread that long, that quick about one of ours Outdone by Sunderland again!

Is he worse than Freddie yet?

Is that a seventy-five page, 750 reply thread about one of our players since this time yesterday? They really put us to shame, I don't think there are many Newcastle fans this obsessed with NUFC. Aye, righto

Seeing some of the feeble attempts at defending Barton over this is depressingly like battered wife syndrome. Well, that nasty man won't make you upset on twitter any more. Let's wait and see if Ashley kicks you in the crotch again.