Keefaz

Also, the only way Parker could disguise a pass would be to put a fake moustache on it.

England have passed it really well in passages. I mean, taking into consideration Bulgaria are very poor.

What would be on those A4 sheets that Pearce was holding that could possibly be of any benefit?

Also, doesn't speak French.

Theo finishing like a fucking boss.

Don't have the sound on. What was Downing gurning about?

Really? Better than Barry? Really. Unless Barry Pele's on the pitch and I didn't spot him.

Rooney is clearly a better player by some distance than his team-mates.

Bulgaria defend like clowns.

Bulgaria are absolute balls. And this England's side's by no means terrific.

Ah, Parker.

Yet they probably paid about £500 to go (and will probably end up trashing the place). Never understood that chant. And they've probably found it quite nice.

Bulgaria are rubbish.

Great ball followed by a total fucking horror pass.

Barry and Parker? These Italian cunts, man.

Half-watching. Looked offside?

Dunno. The PFA probably have a list of players they represent. No doubt loads in the lower leagues, but Prem...?

Wow. Aye. I deleted it and then thought: fuck it. I appreciate you showing me enough respect to post something that offensive. Warms the cockles, that.

Wow. Aye. I deleted it and then thought: fuck it.

Slow down there, driver, slow down. #drivingmissdaisy More like.

Fucking hell Mike! That's taking it too far. No one insults our Queen of Hearts.

Off to play some rummikub and put on some horn-rimmed glasses I don't need. Peace out. #epicbant

We hate it when our friends become successful--and if they're northern, that makes it even worse #mozalwaysgetsitright

Last question: is Ashley a cunt or is he just trying to save his own arse?

It's not about money, it's about ambition. "Do not fear to be eccentric in opinion, for every opinion now accepted was once eccentric." #thetruthhurts