Colos Short and Curlies

It feels like Everton have made some good signings and doing the right thing by buying before selling.... but have they replaced Lukakus goals with who they have brought in? If after all these signings he stayed I would put a cheeky fiver on them winning the league but assuming he goes will they improve on last years finish?

Does Low have those sweat patches built in to his shirts? They are so common with him they may as well be dyed fabric as standard

I'd wager that we agreed a fee in Euros for selling Thauvin back to France so the weaker pound will be hedged through this anyway

Michael Owen doing a personal injury lawyer advert. Lesson in how not to drum up business

What? You're going to believe the Ashley hoop licking article instead of the ones that very obviously were leaked from the Rafa camp. They could of course both be true. Penfold is feeding back to Ashley that all is ok, Rafais p*ssed off and lets it known. Ashley gets p*ssed for being lied to. We've all seen employees telling the boss what they want to hear and not what they should hear You're overlooking a glaring question though, what would Charnley have to gain from not spending money that Mike has already sanctioned? It makes no sense. Not about not spending it, more to do with being out of his depth in getting deals done. Every time the question is asked 'all on track boss', 'just formalities of paperwork to do boss'

What? You're going to believe the Ashley hoop licking article instead of the ones that very obviously were leaked from the Rafa camp. They could of course both be true. Penfold is feeding back to Ashley that all is ok, Rafais pissed off and lets it known. Ashley gets pissed for being lied to. We've all seen employees telling the boss what they want to hear and not what they should hear

Give Henri Jacks wages

If it wasn't a pattern to making signings late then I'd suggest that buying after July 1st this year would make a big deal of sense tax wise. As it is a pattern however I'd say we are either just slow or prioritise a few weeks of not paying wages over team integration

Definitely played the ball(s) there

Probably a consortium of all the take aways in Newcastle. Still, I'd be willing to contribute with a sweet and sour chicken balls every Saturday

We'll have a horrid November where we play last seasons top 5 and then 3 of the top 5 again an April. Southampton away first, Huddersfield away Boxing Day, Everton home last game

And food

I hope they stay up - at the expense of Palace

No one outside the top 7 likely to finish with a positive goal difference this season

So whilst the 'refereeing' in the Forest game ultimately had no impact on where we finished, it did send Blackburn down.

Still think there is room for 1 maverick in Rafas team. Free role number 10

Whatever it takes. Mini Mike will be giving lap dances for a fiver. Or just not laying over VAT and PAYE to HMRC

I hope to Christ we do upgrade Yedlin. He's decent going forward but his defending is way below Premiership standard. He'll get eaten alive. Seemed to do fine at Sunderland. I didn't see much of him in the Premiership, but I suspect he ended up in the Championship for a reason. I just think he gives his opponent far too much time and space to get their cross in. His positioning looks wrong. You could say the same of Ritchie and Gayle re being in the Championship. Both of those will be fine next season

Yup, I now hope that the garage had fucked up their delivery and the unleaded was actually diesel after all

Too much to ask for a Mitro goal to round it all off?

'Jack Colback committing foul after foul' Not heard that before

Hope they struggle next season. Hope all their fans put unleaded in their diesel cars

Every year I think.

Is that 99 goals for the season in league and cup? That would be annoying, especially after Burton

In Barclays HQ our 90s championship winning team share the wall of fame with all of the premier league winners. It definitely counts.