GM

MA's been wining and dining with Philip Green, apparently. Exciting stuff.

The next manager will be publicly beheaded by the Chairman at full-time, having lost 0-6 at home to Bolton.

Daft twat, saw Alan Green in the thread title and thought Sky are now saying he's on the way, or the bookies have suspended all betting on him or that he was spotted in Greggs. I only have one heart GM. Apologies for any myocardial infarction I may have induced there.

So... Anyone heard anything more from Alan Green on the sacking of Sam Allardyce? :parky:

Rioting is your best bet. Set some old people on fire. Better still, get your mug on Sky Sports News and gabber on about how excited you are that Mourinho is definitely coming to the Toon and "we're ganning to win the league noo"...

The speculation about Mark Hughes is rife amongst Blackburn fans - they've been waiting for something like this to happen since Ashley took over apparently. Or so says my Blackburn supporting workmate. I can't see it being Harry - not unless Ashley and Mort want a full on mong fest insurgency outside SJP chanting "Burn the cockney bastard at the stake!"

Roy Keane. Mad enough to do it.

I think we'll be "pleasantly surprised"!

I've just got off the phone to the big chap upstairs, you know, the Big Chief, aka GOD. He's confirmed to me that he's sending his second son to St James' Park. The Second Coming. All Hail Jose, the New Geordie Messiah.

Some might say that appointing Redknapp would complete a handsome hat-trick of allegedly bungtastic managers - (almost) three in a row, anyway. Redknapp is a "shepherd" style appointment. No, we're definitely dealing with a whole different kettle of fish now we have Ashley and Mort at the helm. EDIT - Oh bugger it, Dev already did. I was too slow.

Time to consult with your Mayan wish dolls, Parky.

I hope this comes back to haunt you.

Oh fuck. Not Souness again.

You called, sweetheart?

That's just brilliant, son. Brilliant.

Well it's probably all a bit foreign to him at the moment.

"When ze seagulls follow ze trawler, eet eez because zey think ze sardines will be thrown into the sea"

Which gives the lie to how clued up the Editor is then, clearly.

exactly. if this bollocks surely they wouldnt let it past? makes you wonder........... Editors will print whatever gets circulation up. An apology can always be slipped into a small corner of a column on page 34 if needed.

so who can tell me how to make it big enough to read ? Have you tried stroking it vigorously for a few seconds?

I'm disappointed there's not been more people on this thread proclaiming how, if this is proven to be true, they will bare their arse in Fenwick's window, or eat their own hat or whatever...

You can say you're not interested inthe job without it being an absolute. Take Roeder for example. Shearer probably knows his own mind a bit better than Roeder, and sticks to his word. Traits that would make him a better manager than Roeder was. In fairness I have to agree with you on that - I'm convinced Roeder's attainment of 7th place was in no small part due to Shearer's influence on the team as co-pilot. I think results attest to that much, so maybe, just maybe, Shearer has what it takes to motivate and maintain discipline in a squad of players in a way Roeder clearly didn't at this level. That said, I would still prefer he went and managed Southampton or somesuch other club first.

You got their telephone number mate? Otherwise, I guess you could always try phoning Anal and asking him.

Comedy gold I reckon the penny's finally dropped for Anal Olly...and now he's just going for broke as a full-time comedy writer.

Makes a change from Oliver having his head up Freddie's arse.