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Same shit, different game No creativity, no movement and players who have hundreds of international caps between them apparently can't pass a football That must be Barton's last game for us too, he's got a horrific appearance record for us, much of it has been due to injuries but there have been too many suspended games too

Blackburn, two seasons after they won the Premiership

I'd not put any money on Ashley selling up if we go down, the HBOS share deal he was involved in suggests that he'll hang on to the club, he lost £millions with his bet on the price of HBOS shares rather than getting out early and losing a much lower amount. If he believes that the club can gain promotion again within a season or two he'll hang on in the knowledge that the value of his investment will rise substantially if we're in the Premiership. Unless someone in Newcastle strikes oil under their house Beverly-Hillbillies-style we're very likely to be stuck with Ashley for the foreseeable future.

Good. The players who will piss off are the fuckers who have landed us in this shit. Players like Nicky Butt (39 caps), Alan Smith (19 caps) & Damien Duff (72 caps) have all played for years in the Premiership, they've played in the Champions League, in 130 senior internationals between them including games at the World Cup. Yet somehow they've forgotten how to pass a ball more than 10 metres, they're devoid of ideas other than hoof it! and have resisted the urge to follow the most basic instructions on moving into and creating space that school children have drummed into them. You're worried that we might lose these players? I'm worried that they might stay!

That's a pretty good article & sums up a lot of the problems without resorting to crap stereotypes, who'd have thought the Daily Mail was capable of that?

They were right in summing up the game on Setanta for once. Too many players seem desperate to avoid being the one who loses the ball so they look for the safe, easy pass at almost every opportunity, like playing pass the parcel with a live hand grenade no one wants to be the one caught holding on too long. The midfield sits far too deep, they rarely look for the risky through ball, they don't want the ball at their feet. Fuck em. Drop them & play younger, hungrier players who want the ball so they can show off what they can do. Shearer could drop Duff, Butt, Shola, Nolan, Ryan Taylor & Geremi for the rest of the season & we'd probably not notice their absence. Use the others like Guthrie, Smith & Barton who haven't been affected by the general malaise with a sprinkling of youth and we'd probably see a real impact.

fucking woeful any single player in that side who believes that was acceptable needs shooting

Whilst it's true that he hasn't created as many chances/goals as most of us would like, he does create space for the team to exploit. The fact that the most of the rest of the team is pretty woeful at actually doing anything with that space can't be blamed on him.

Not really, we'd certainly suffer from a huge drop in revenue but we're in a far better position than 3/4 of the Premiership as we do have an owner (currently) willing to bankroll the club. West Ham (37%) & Portsmouth (31%) would certainly suffer with a drop in revenue of that amount since both are already experiencing financial problems with no new funding likely to appear any time soon. The biggest impact for us is likely to be the impact the drop in revenue has on other team's transfer spending. We're relying on buyers coming in for much of the dead wood here.

Well that's an improvement over most of our current squad who have almost zero work rate and an awful end product.

Sunderland? Gave millions to a slightly disturbed man who used the cash to buy players before deciding a couple of days later that, in fact, he didn't want them after all. Far too many players, even if they did have the core of a decent side they still have too many others that they need to keep happy (or keep to contract obligations). At some stage their financial backers are going to want to see some sort of return on their money, either through profits or trophies. Boro? People often go on about how great a chairman they have in Steve Gibson, he's stood by his managers through good times and bad and backed the club's transfer spending with his own money. However, Gibson's pockets aren't limitless. He's long since reached the point where his own assets can cover additional transfer spending and with mediocre attendances at the Riverside they can't fund too many big signings. The success of their academy side is less about bringing through genuine talent and a lot more to do with their inability to buy new players. Ironically, he may have also been too loyal to his managers. A lot of Boro fans had had enough of McClaren long before the England FA saw his "qualities" and nabbed him for the vacant England job. Most of their fans think of Southgate in the way many of us think of Roeder - nice guy, probably a decent coach, but you'd not really want him in charge of the first team. His loyalty to Bryan Robson would have seen them sink without a trace. For Boro & Sunderland it comes down to pretty much the same thing as us - finding the right manager and giving them adequate time and financial backing to achieve success. Darlington are in a bizarre position, they've got an enormous stadium (for a League Two side) and they can't even use it all. If they were in the Championship or Premiership and had the restrictions on selling all their seats lifted they'd probably be financially stable. Even nearly 5 years after he left the club are still feeling the effects of their former chairman's ambitions. Hartlepool aren't doing brilliantly in League One but aren't doing that badly either. Like many teams in League One they can be challenging for promotion on season & facing relegation the next.

Swindon in 93/94 Possibly the worst top flight team ever assembled (and that includes both Sunderland record holding teams)

If everyone's fit then this has to be the line-up. I'd be tempted to play Owen in a much deeper role, almost as a midfielder since he can pass the ball extremely well and he does work hard when he gets the ball.

Still too many passengers in the side, Owen, the central midfield, etc. We looked 10x better as a team when Martins & Viduka came on but the chances of keeping them fit for the last few games is slim. If we drop any points in those 3 home games we're fucked, winning them all will be a miracle.

Because the other option for corner takers seems to be Ryan Taylor who has managed to make Duff look like an excellent option for taking set pieces recently.

Even though he's shite, he provided the assist for our only goal. He's a waste of space but probably one of the few players who can actually supply something from midfield, even if it is only once a game. He did get the assist for the equaliser, but it was via a deflection. The only thing of real substance that Duff has produced in weeks and it came from a deflected cross. He may claim that's what he meant to do, but I think we've all used that excuse before in pool/snooker/etc, it's bullshit then too.

Something else that we did years ago but have apparently forgotten about that you see the "top" teams doing all the time. When was the last time you remember seeing a Newcastle winger running in from either wing to anticipate an overhit cross or defensive error from a cross from the opposite wing? I can't remember seeing Duff or Jonas (or Milner, or N'Somnia, or any winger going back to Nobby) doing it.

Oops Creditors of Liverpool owner Tom Hicks say Hicks Sports Group is in default on debts of £351m. (Wall Street Journal) So he's defaulted on some of the debts he's run up in buying teams in the US & he and George Gillet are desperately scrabbling around looking to renegotiate the loan that they used to buy Liverpool. July could be a very interesting time in the Premiership.

I'd take David Bentley & Darren Bent at the right price.

Q: What's guaranteed to make a team's supporters desire relegation? A: The prospect of signing Shola Ameobi if they stay in the premiership

Have to admit, although I don't think Carroll's anywhere near to being the best striker we have his performances this season when called upon have been fantastic and he's put Owen, Martins, Viduka and Ameobi to shame.

2nd time that Butt's run the ball out of play in the same position

CARROLL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Closest we've really come all game

3 players standing around a ball, each waiting for another to pick it up when a Stoke player wanders in and takes it. Sums up our entire midfield.