Ronaldo

I'm sure I've posted on here before about him ringing up my mate at William Hill wanting to place pretty large bets on expired golf markets.

No one is saying everything is bad. The fact is, though, our league position - which looks fairly precarious - is built on great away form. And it's pretty obvious that without Shelvey our away approach is basically nullified because we've got no one in there to orchestrate the transition game. In other words it's all a big house of cards next to an open window at the moment and with our resources and the absolutely necessity of promotion this season, that's not really the position the club should be in.

Unlike Crooks he's not remotely entertaining, just an awful excuse for a functioning adult.

Especially when it's been so blatantly obviously recently how much the difference between us and the crap of the division is predicated on a few standout players. Hold on, are we serious now? That we wouldn't be near the top two positions without Gayle and Shelvey? Yes, I am. You'd have to be a mong of epic proportions not to see how reliant we are on those two to win football matches. Before you start with your guff, I'm well aware most sides wouldn't be the same without their best two players, but in this divison they probably didn't make a £32m profit in the last transfer window. We need to be getting stuff done and soon.

He torn his hamstring in his second game and it ruined him. He was fucking awesome in Spain. Should have been an excellent signing and fwiw had a very promising debut against Man U.

Especially when it's been so blatantly obviously recently how much the difference between us and the crap of the division is predicated on a few standout players.

He wrote all but two words of that before it kicked off, man. Load of nonsense.

Sell Belgium?

It's a brilliant draw, like. Hope we don't fuck about at home to Brum.

Thanks for the tip.

Not one single positive contribution at the age of 20 months? Fucking hell.

Isn't Oxford meant to be a really freaking nice place? And right next to London? Oxford itself probably is a nice place to visit but the ground and surrounding area won't be. Rafas awful brand of football with Colback the midfield general.....pass the fucking razor blade. Says the guy who goes to Meadowell to watch North Shields play. That's good.

What a great draw.

Bernard at his best was brilliant both going forward and defensively. Injuries, Souness (and other factors) ruined him. Real shame.

In Italy if you finish 17th playing abysmal football like Allardyce you don't get lauded for it, you get sacked. The shit is filtered away far more efficiently, which is one of the reasons we're about to see the 4th different Italian manager in 7 years win the PL. Never been done by an English manager.

Away from home especially, our transition game of trying to exploit space on the counter is completely predicated on his eye and ability to execute the pass. We really need backup for him for that reason. At home it's a bit of a different story.

We should be at least paying them a couple hundred thousand.

I know I've played it till the sun comes up but Shawcross would be ideal for someone like Lascelles or Clark to learn from. Rafa will probably be seeking our version of Carragher this summer and he obviously suits that role.

Can't believe how good my gambling luck has been so far this year, like. 2 trips to the casino, 2 sessions of blackjack online and I'm up just over £3.5K.

It's pathetic, like, how badly people need their favourites and targets. There are cunts in our squad who've been robbing the club for years but Sels is just a young keeper doing his best who was bought by mistake. Not his fault he's not up to it.

Great fun. Do you get those at a toy shop?

.com absolutely brutal about him, like.

We badly need to invest in players who'll provide some creativity, like. It's absolutely embarrassing how short we are in that area.

I think I've enjoyed episodes of My Family more than our football this second half, like.

High-eedra off for Ritchie.