Ronaldo

He'd be mad to stay. He's far too good for NUFC.

Disgusting dive, like. Little cunt.

Thick as a castle wall.

He has to play, though. We'll only get goals with 2 strikers on the pitch.

It was an amateurish attempt to save it but he did OK overall. Kicking's shit, unsurprisingly.

He's just a complete and utter failure who retains his employment with us because he's cheap and curtsies to Ashley.

Fair enough, but don't start Steven fucking Taylor. No excuse for that.

As if we had £12m to spent on a CB and chose him. Graham Carr needs to be shot in the head.

Totally deserve that. Mind what was Rafa thinking starting Taylor and Tiote? Fucking ludicrous.

At least that team had the likes of Nolan, Barton and Harper in. Players with little ability but fight and pride. Those players dragged us up through the Championship. That isn't there anymore, we'll be down for years when we get relegated Barton barely contributed to our Championship season, man. It's staggering how much credit Joey Barton gets for his largely woeful spell here.

You can't compare that lot to John fucking Carver, man.

Can't wait to be sending out Taylor, Colback and Rivière every week. What difference would it make? They are all shit you daft cunt.

As if we had £80m to spent and our central defence consists of Taylor and Mbemba, man. We've no right to be in the Premier League.

A huge bonus if Cheick fucking Tiote plays. Christ, we're at rock bottom, as a club and a fan base.

Explanation. Boring this, now, like. I don't think there's ever any excuse for attacking a woman, and when it's on a regular basis for years there's obviously a stronger element of deliberation than can ever be defended with the substance abuse. If this makes me judgmental or whatever, fine.

He'll tear up the Championship.

Guaranteed goals.

I see his LinkedIn doesn't reveal that he participated in the Black Bull's prediction league last season and finished 2nd bottom out of over 100 people.

Yeah, this is how I see it. Rafa will know every strength and weakness of that Norwich side which is something to cling onto but we're reliant on inexperienced players playing above themselves to get a result and I envisage more sinking than swimming.

They did, though. That's the whole point. Do I think it's all his fault? No. I never implied an alcoholic didn't deserve sympathy if they relapse, either. Give them as much support as they need, but for for Christ's sake don't absolve them of all blame, that's like saying they're fighting a losing battle.

I hope you mean Corbett, HTT.

No, I haven't. Does his book offer an excuse for beating his wife and kids for years and also explains why it isn't remotely his fault for the drinking? Honestly, man, do one. You want to hero worship a lowlife like that because he was born in the same postcode area and call other people names for suggesting a modicum of blame might actually rest with him.

That's really cute, HTT, but it isn't really a case of having a heart or not. It comes down whether you believe that an addiction implies a person can be absolved of all blame for their actions. As for the sympathy aspect. If I knew nothing about Gazza - just another bloke shortening his life and severing relationships because he's compelled to get wasted - yeah, he'd have my sympathy, sure. Unfortunately, it's hard for me to feel any degree for sympathy for someone who's had his opportunities and done what he's done.

Baines just isn't an international footballer. He's a long way off that standard.

He owns/runs a farm shop just round the corner from Carlos Tevez's old gaff in Prestbury.