Ronaldo

Jovetic actually gave the worst performance I've ever seen from a player costing over £10m tonight. Everything he did was wrong.

Christ have this lot wasted an incredible amount of money.

He's a good defender. I'm not sure where his final position will be but I think he'll be our starting LB for the duration of Pardew's tenure.

3 minutes.

Shearer was retired, actually. I'm pretty sure he was playing. It was against Chelsea. I know it was. He may have been playing in spirit but he was retired.

Shearer was retired, actually.

We're playing the right teams at the right time. There's nothing more to it than that.

Noel.

City really haven't bothered one bit here.

Think it's worth mentioning we've been up against a mixture of shit, laziness and abysmal tactics.

Same with Jonas. These players may graft but they consistently ruin any chance of dynamic attacking width.

City are totally in training ground mode, as they were in the last round up until HT.

£55m on Mangala and Jovetic ffs. They'd be better off just burning piles of money in the street to keep tramps warm.

Who said that?

God Almighty that team.

Did he just say City are at their most dangerous when they have the ball?

He's a 12 year old attacking midfielder I was convinced he was a 12-year-old striker, like.

Armstrong.

I definitely won't do that.

Wouldn't say he was a joke here at all. We weren't creating many chances that season at all and he still scored a respectable 13 goals in limited appearances. All from open play too.

I'll refer to Dier as Dia for the rest of his miserable life. I just knew we'd get something from that Spurs game, though. Even put money on us winning DNB.

There's something incredibly tragic about him being praised for disciplined performances for Steve Bruce at Hull City. What a waste of a career.

There's nowt to enjoy. We narrowly beat a really poor side which keeps the fraud in a job for 2 more months.

I think Disco might've made that one up, like.

Nah. It would finish 4-1 at best. Keegan's side is stronger in almost every department.