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This thread is just all shit jokes now

It's the Ashley equation. Abandon all hope

If Cabella is good we won't sign him. If he's bad we will. If he's good and we somehow sign him we'll make him bad. If we fail to make him bad we'll sell at first ask. I think that just about covers all the bases.

Vermaelen knocking the cap off

Happy for Arsenal. Wish it was us.

Imagine if that bounced off an Arsenal defender and went in

Holy shit

Wonder if Wenger decides to retire after this

Arsenal more than deserved that

This cup final is brilliant

I'd be up for Gateshead. I get them to the prem every year on football manager so I feel like I have a connection Feel free to support my local club if you'd like to be a reverse-glory hunter. Lovely crest as well. http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/en/thumb/f/fa/Emblem_of_FC_Seoul.svg/200px-Emblem_of_FC_Seoul.svg.png

He can't have the Sports Direct signs on for the CL. I sincerely believe that's the reason he'd want no part of it

You know, sending out the reserves for the cup games wouldn't be too bad if we had actually bothered developing youth properly and had young players that weren't terrible.

His knees have given out. Was told by a doctor that he'd have three years to play at most during his last year at Man United.

"Enjoy it, Reds" South Korea appear to have already given up. Love the double exclamation point on England's, too. I think the idea is that we put these guys under ridiculous and healthy pressure every four years, so let's not do it this time.

You must also rate Jonas very highly too. Jonas was a poor man's Park at his peak, and I rate peak Jonas pretty highly. They are both good pros with a high degree of work rates but as footballers they are very much meh for the levels theyve played at for me. If Park was a meh player Alex Ferguson would not have kept him around for seven seasons. Obviously he's not Ronaldo or Rooney, but he was a very, very good player who's underrated because he always did what the manager asked and never agitated to get more minutes or more of the ball. He was a completely different player for the national team. Every single attacking move went through him. The one thing I dislike about him was that he was content to be a squad player at Man United instead of a star for a smaller club.

You must also rate Jonas very highly too. Jonas was a poor man's Park at his peak, and I rate peak Jonas pretty highly.

Jisung Park announces his retirement from football. He burst onto the scene right around when I started watching football and now I've seen out his entire career. Feels surreal that he's not playing anymore.

Had on. These c***s get bonus' because they were too s*** for is to sell? Yip - loyalty and that I wish I could be rewarded for being so s*** it my job no other company was willing to part with cash for me to work for them... You do, it's called severance pay. At the end of my current contract I'd be lucky to get a pat on the back if I was s*** at my job . Lucky I'm the sales equivalent of Lionel Messi really. The point being, it's not uncommon for people to be rewarded for not moving jobs. Loyalty bonuses for footballers have mostly replaced signing on fees anyway. It's not meant as a reward for playing well. Nah I get the point. It just stinks. I mean, yeah, I'm not a fan either Ashley will probably take it out of our transfer budget too

Had on. These c***s get bonus' because they were too s*** for is to sell? Yip - loyalty and that I wish I could be rewarded for being so s*** it my job no other company was willing to part with cash for me to work for them... You do, it's called severance pay. At the end of my current contract I'd be lucky to get a pat on the back if I was shit at my job . Lucky I'm the sales equivalent of Lionel Messi really. The point being, it's not uncommon for people to be rewarded for not moving jobs. Loyalty bonuses for footballers have mostly replaced signing on fees anyway. It's not meant as a reward for playing well.

Had on. These c***s get bonus' because they were too s*** for is to sell? Yip - loyalty and that I wish I could be rewarded for being so shit it my job no other company was willing to part with cash for me to work for them... You do, it's called severance pay.

Korea released their squad last week but I barely know most of these players so I don't expect anyone else to

I suppose he's better than nothing if we manage to sign nobody as expected.

Just saw a super-awkward beef jerkey commercial with Clint Dempsey and Stephen A. Smith. That was a life changing experience.

I sincerely don't understand the logic of giving him so much playing time when we were going to ditch him at the end of season anyway.