Kaizero

Nusa has looked nigh unplayable every time he's put on the Norway shirt. Just running through everyone.

Starting to think we'll win the World Cup the way we're playing these days.

Geniunely would've thought "what the hell has this guy done to @gbandit for him to go that far?!" without the part in the parenthesis Sometimes I've wondered if it's ever really necessary to clarify stuff in posts that way, turns out the answer is a very definitive "yes, it is"

Probably not the exact same matches as you, but also had a cheeky 14-fold that only failed because of Sweden

https://bracketfights.com/create/nufcplmanagers-191346/ ...Few times in life I've ever felt like needing to find something productive to spend my time on more so than I am feeling right now

Tried my hand on an "alignment chart"...

Shearer: Pearson:

Added it, also finally figured out how to remove an image so no more Pearson

Don't disagree at all, man But would have to include our shit (but not massive cunts) managers on the lowest rank to make room for him in D

Absolutely, but I couldn't be arsed finding and cropping pics of the other caretakers and couldn't figure out how to get Pearson out after I'd already made the mistake of including him, so it is what it is

Pearson

44.83 win percentage, higher than Rafa. Dislike the guy but couldn't put him on D with the "worst" managers (F being reserved for "worst" + "biggest cunt" combo ).

Something like this I reckon: For those wanting to have a go themselves: https://tiermaker.com/create/nufcmanagers-pl-18656080

To be fair to Romano, he's not a "bullshitter" per se. He gets paid a lot of money from both clubs and agents to use his social media platform and presence to force through the transfers the clubs/agents/players paying him wants him to make happen. He's an absolute cunt human being, granted, but not sure "bullshitter" is the right way to describe the smug cunt.

His son works as one of the main club/player liasons at the PFA, likely to have gotten involved if JSL reached out to figure out his options forcing through a transfer. So, with that in mind, Fjørtoft Seniors tweets might have a grain of actual ITK-ness to them, for once

And yes, that is actually a genuine law

Have been rather hyperbolic, admittedly. However, I just saw the perfect example explaining my opinion as a Norwegian when it comes to Swedes & Danes: "We'd give up a kidney if they ever needed one, but like fuck we'd let them borrow a charger."

The hate between Norwegians and Swedes is a sibiling-rivalry type hatred, essentially "we can absolute fuck each other up 24/7, but, if you even dare thinking about messing with them... we're allowed to, you're not" Whereas both Norwegians and Swedes share the same level of hatred for the Danes, which if the Nor/Swe rivalry could be compared to a sibling rivalry, this would have to be compared to Tom & Jerry spending their lives trying to absolutely cave each others skulls in to kill each other, only to immediately stop whatever they're doing to instantly join forces when the fucking dog (Denmark) barges in, because they want to cave Denmark's skull in a gazillion times more than they want to bash each others skulls in – leaving no other choice than to team up to trash Denmark they'd regroup, take stock of the carnage, and then immediately resume trying to cave the other's skull in again.

Almost didn't sit through the entire minute of video, but glad I did as for some reason the last word sent me straight over the edge

Højlund is one of the absolute worst transfers in Man Utd history. For starters, they spunked away £72 million just on the transfer itself, not to mention giving the absolute wooden piece of shit excuse for a footballer a six year fucking long deal I mean, to put things in perspective they paid £72m for a 1 in 166.51 striker (now a 1 in 186.51 striker), all the while Isak (a 1 in 146.78 striker) could've been signed for reportedly anywhere from £9m to £19m less (and since joining us, Isak's bettered his goalscoring stats and become a 1 in 145.78 striker...) It's just laughable how bad the transfer was, is and always will be. i'm geographically pre-disposed to hate on pretty much any Danish person, be they a footballer, celebrity or private citizen – but this genuinely has, from day one, objectively been a disaster everyone else than Man Utd (and its most angry online fans) saw coming from miles away. The guy's always been shit! Like, not "shit" in the context of being a professional footballer. I've no doubt he'd hold his own in the Danish Superliga or any of the other mid-tier European leagues, probably would do okay+ for a club in the MLS or the Saudi league as well. But he's never even shown an inch of potential towards becoming an elite striker in one of the top divisions in Europe, let alone for a club supposed to be able to steadily challenge for honours in one of them

I think most top attacking players are averaging in the 31km/h to 34km/h area, which are all speeds where the actual difference will be wholly negligible for the average viewer unless they're already near top speed as they face down a slower opponent. Them doing that is probably also one of the few times their actual top speed matters in a game situation as what you really want isn't "fastest player", but "player accelerating fastest", as it's not their "top speed" that matters (beyond box-to-box races between attacking and defensive players when one team chases a breakaway counter after, for example, an opponent corner kick gone wrong). Beyond wingers vs wing/fullbacks, you won't see many one-on-one races during a match. You will see tons of opportunities for strikers to accelerate past defenders, though.

I mean, I'd not call any of the following players "slow"... Jørgen Strand Larsen — 33.15 km/t Alexander Isak — 32.68 km/t Alexander Sørloth — 32.50 km/t Nick Woltemade — 31.43 km/t ^ Highest measured top speed of each player in a 2024 UEFA Nations League match.

I mean, you'd have to be blind to not see the differences between their style of play beyond both of them being a pair of tall fuckers I'd describe JSL as the modern version of what a #9 traditionally used to be in England, whereas Woltemade is more of a #10 due to being a very technical player with great close control of the ball.

FWIW, JSL was called-up to the national squad earlier today and when asked about having picked "injured" players (Ødegaard & JSL), our cunt manager (I just hate the guy, let me be ) responded that Ødegaard was picked as he "might" get fit in time to be available for at least one of the two matches, if not both, so calling him up even if it wasn't a sure thing he'd play was "worth the risk". Then said he'd spoken to JSL and was told he was fit and ready to play.

Probably already been posted, but couldn't risk such top class banter from a professional football club go unappreciated on here: