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Presumably a joke? Didn't bother reading it but apparently he gave fucked up ratings for the Man Utd game.

Slim, has Santoon/Mandoon given up on the club altogether? Noticed he hasn't been on here for a long time. He's still posting about us on Twitter a lot.

That's it. Aside from the ridiculous list of tasks (not sure how you can be down Lidl getting his microwave donner kebabs when you're meant to be somewhere getting a fucking aftershave deal sorted) it says you have to be on call 24/7. It's insane.

Apologies if it's already been asked but will it be possible to pick up BBC Newcastle commentary online if you're outside the region? I seem to remember it's been available in the past for some cup games and only blocked on the likes of TuneIn for league games...

he's always been an absolute fuckwit.

That young lad who got pictures of Mbemba at the training ground reckons Thauvin is there now. @BenArmy_6 on Twitter. Good to see he's still having a productive school holiday.

To be fair like, Bertrand came through Chelsea's youth system, having been loaned out all over. Pelle was with Koeman at Feyenoord where he presumably watched Tadic at Twente and Fonte was signed by Pardew having been at Palace. It's hardly unearthing gems and as Sewelly said, if we were prepared to invest in more than one scout, we could easily do similar. All good players signed for reasonable fees near and far. I'd say thats good scouting no matter what you say. It's just buying well within reason. With the examples above its not like they've sent someone halfway across the globe not knowing what to expect when they get there.

To be fair like, Bertrand came through Chelsea's youth system, having been loaned out all over. Pelle was with Koeman at Feyenoord where he presumably watched Tadic at Twente and Fonte was signed by Pardew having been at Palace. It's hardly unearthing gems and as Sewelly said, if we were prepared to invest in more than one scout, we could easily do similar.

Fairly certain you'll find that it's an old London phrase.

You know exactly how that'll have gone. Ryder called Clark up and basically began putting words into his mouth. He's fucking obsessed with having as many Geordies at the club as possible.

Captain Benteke going some way towards compensating for another miserable week.

Dyer away at Sporting anarl.

Putting "The Premiership" on and watching Sunderland lose 3-1 at home to Charlton having scored all the goals.

But surely you can see the concern that it could very well be one or the other so late on?

We need a winger, so I'm fairly happy but I'm more concerned that signing this lad will be the last of our money used up when we're still appalling at the back. As for Cabella going the other way, I'm not that arsed. Haven't seen much that's impressed me tbf.

How the fuck are they skint? They haven't exactly spent megabucks. Even in 2013 when they signed about 90 new players, none of them cost that much. Can only assume they're paying a lot of them silly money.

Aye. A complete non-entity if it wasn't for us being the utter shambles we are.

N'Zogbia away at Villa was another go-over-the-seats-in-front moment.

England-wise: Beckham v Greece, nearly all five against Germany (was in a bar in Tunisia about half and half of each) but topping the lot for utter messiness was Rooney v Uruguay in the academy with pints of flat Tuborg going all over.

Nah, just basically put plenty of daylight between us and them. Promotion was secured just before we played Sheff Utd and then obviously the title at Plymouth.

Ended up miles away from where I should've been after Martins' second away at Blackburn and Ameobi's away at Sheff Wed.

Niall, you're drunk. Remember to call a taxi.

Shuggsy cracking more funnies. Lord Sugar ‏@Lord_Sugar 4m4 minutes ago .@SkySportsNewsHQ @SkyFootball @SkyFootball .. I would like you to ask Jose if he thinks they may get relegated

Aguero's English is still crap.

Are they playing "One Step Beyond" to wind the Chelsea fans up?