Pilko

Rickie Lambert went to Southampton this summer from Bristol Rovers for £1m. I'd be surprised if the record was much higher than that.

He's probably worth around half that at a very maximum,

Ah well, he'll be back off to Benidorm soon. (anyone who gets that, well done)

Fulham/Villa last year, four fully grown men doing some stupid tithead line dance a few rows in front as everyone made their way into the ground. Were blatantly trying to get on camera for 2good, 2 bad. Safe to say they were too shit to get on.

As Yorkie pointed out, I had the Saturday before West Brom (on the Monday) as an ideal time for this.

It would be even better if he just rolled in at 2.55pm wearing a t-shirt, flowery shorts, shades and flip-flops.

Loving the ghostly Dara O'Brien there.

When they get that jumbo-screen thing, get someone to hack it and play this video Mick made ages ago:

Hey, was that someone brushing their teeth behind the dugout?

I heard someone whistling (through their mouth) before it was finished yesterday Yeah, I heard that on the radio. A few people actually mistook it for the referees whistle and started clapping, then the ref actually blew about 3 or 4 seconds later.

YEEEEAAAAAAHHHHHH!!

Olofinjana against his former club ofc.

Hope they lose but retain Brown.

Are Burton at home, or away? Burton at home is always a cracking bet, they have excellent home form and yet are usually underdogs in every game due to them being newly promoted. Always a good one to stick in an accy, if they're at home that is.

Chelsea game won't have more than two goals. SUPER SUNDAY and/or GRAND SLAM SUNDAY = damb squib.

Johnny Allen playing upfront for Northwich. http://3.bp.blogspot.com/_YUaB9C3r3FM/SelPw7XsPSI/AAAAAAAAABc/puw8Q8MgtBE/s400/billy+murray+as+johnny+allen.jpg

Would love to see a 0-1 Stoke win today.

Please please please: Hull 0-1 Stoke, with a goal from someone shit like Fuller

No thanks.

Have lumped on Drogba as an anytime goalscorer. 9/5 with Paddy Power, unreal price that. Also have a cheeky "first goal to be scored between the 51st and 60th minute" £1 pays £18 there.

OMG OMG OMG OMG SKIRGE'S FINGER OMG

I had Watford in one of my columns today, just the other useless twats fucked up didn't they

Nothing doing today. 2/4 on both lines.