Pilko

He's a strange player, he manages to look like an excellent defender and an absolute carthorse at the same time.

My week kind of hinges on Isak as captain. Still got Diaz and Robertson to play as well but sat on 47 points. Some decent contributions today - Jackson, Brennan Johnson, Gabriel, Watkins and Porro all posting good totals.

Is Gary Neville still going to keep saying "if City get one now it could get interesting" with 90 seconds to go at 4-0?

Great post-match interview from him today. Highlights include: "That's for sure" x 2 "It was a difficult place to come and play" "It's tough for us at the moment" "When you're on a run like we are and someone smashes one in the top corner, all these things seem to happen to you" () "We've got to not be as naive as we were" Blamed the players for being "too gung ho" and "being out of position" when they conceded the late goal "Wuh didn't deserve that" Only missing "dust wasels doon" and "rolled up wah sleeves" for a line on the bingo card.

Great night for him to get his first NUFC hatty.

HMS draw the league. They play WBA midweek who absolutely shag a draw as well, money on a stalemate there.

Footy is back! Unbelievably good finish by Andre Gray to equalise for Plymouth with what I'm pretty sure was their first shot of any kind of the game.

I think Wigan might be one (1-0 up the tics come on)?

Feels so rare that we run into an opponent in a muddle like, usually we get them just after they've been shite for ages, sacked the manager and got the caretaker or new manager bounce.

Gateshead announced that they've reached agreement with the council to satisfy EFL qualification criteria should they get there. Why the cunts couldn't settle that last season and let them have the crack at the playoffs I don't know but good news at least.

Let's hear it for the England B team!

Piss off Kane. Pathetic that he went so deep for the ball in the first place.

I'm sure there'll be flat track bully goals against the knacker sides for Kane in future qualifiers, and the odd pen, but this England side are held back by him so much. Really hope Tuchel can squeeze the last bit out of him and find a way for this side to get goals from him and he calls international footy a day after WC26. Watching him potter around midfield in the way of Bellingham all the time is painful.

Play on Madueke you bellend. Appeal for it when the ball goes out FFS.

Pay them more if they stop being so incredibly shit and inconsistent across the board. They're fucking rubbish.

More of a rugby man. Admits it.

You'd think today of all days with the internationals they'd make it a tenner, give it a big push and try get fans without a game to go to along wouldn't you.

Fabianski?

Jonny Evans Raheem Sterling Kyle Walker Seamus Coleman Those are my best guesses

Coote scandal update! Referee sleeps in an oxygen tent that he believes gives him sexual powers

It was David Coote who assassinated JFK as well.

He'll be on the phone asking the Wetherby Whaler to stay open past ten so he can divert the team bus after the game, only 20 mins down the road.

Seen Manish Bhasin is 12/1. Really hope when he goes to the interview he rolls out some of his Football League Show clips with Steve Claridge fuck me that was a depressing point in our history having to stay up to watch that absolute shit heap.