Pilko

Goes for a few pints on Thursday night and then complains to his missus that he's too hungover to go to church on Sunday.

Goes to Nandos and has the chicken caesar salad with no chicken and no dressing.

Nobby was always one of my favourite players, but I've always been a huge Beckham fanboy like. He was an absolutely superb player.

He was shit even in that unbeaten run at the start of 2011/12, I can remember everyone dying to see Marveaux given a game because Obertan had been so poor.

To be fair, these 1 to 11 things would be very boring if players just picked the players with the best ability. It's a bit more interesting when they talk about their own personal relationships with players, how they complimented each other within the team/dressing room etc, and why.

I'm sure we won a few Premier League games with a Bowyer-Amdy Faye central midfield pairing and an ailing Lee Clark shoring up off the bench.

"John Kramer sacked as Birmingham manager, Dr Gordon appointed caretaker manager" says confused neesy

Improved performance but 2-0 Spurs.

It's because Ashley only cares about margins so he's trying to impress him. Read latest quotes and as per usual predictable horse s*** coming from that gobshite of a manager. I read that too, he likes his buzz words, it's like that episode of Family Guy where Lois tries to come up with a catchphrase, can see Pardew coming out after we lose with "it's getting too spicy for the pepper!". Francine from American Dad, but aye.

So when we're 0-3 down in the 88th minute, Pardew can at least draw a smattering of applause from the crowd by giving him a return cameo.

Pardew Pardew give us a wave as Cisse scores a 90th minute consolation.

That should read: Top: No Bottom: Yes Left: Gouffran Right: Obertan Gutter: We're lying in it Header: Riviere Footer: Dummett Apply to: Whole season

'Cisse should not have played. My medical staff did not agree that he should be included. He’s trained five days with the Ebola virus. But myself and John looked at him on Thursday and thought he looks ready for half an hour, he looks fresh.'

Obertan starting after an assist last week is unsurprising. Dropping Gouffran is the one thing he fucking needs to do and almost certainly will not. Sammy provided more end product than Gouffran's last 9 months in 25 minutes at Swansea and I bet he's still left on the bench with Cabella.

I heard that Ashley actually employed Kurt to measure the screen. http://www.watfordobserver.co.uk/resources/images/2472401.jpg?type=articleLandscape

It looks fucking dreadful like.

I feel like Ashley has maybe been mugged off by the screen salesman. http://s14.postimg.org/nzm981bdd/sorny.jpg

Will Hughes scores a lovely goal. That should probably see England through. Croatia are fucking dreadful. They're playing with even less intensity than a Pardew team.

Watching England U21s on BT Sport; that Forster-Caskey looks like a canny player. Probably be bought by a PL team I'd have thought.

Preferably with Pardew, Carver, Charnley and Ashley nailed to them.

bet Pardew has got that Des'ree quote on his office wall.

The one thing Mike Williamson always had was the "likeable, honest, good guy" tag which he's now spunking up Pardew's walls.

The cup of tea in the office bit is: http://images.tvrage.com/screencaps/31/6060/200093.jpg

We'll get beat 3-0, but they'll display the words "NUFC 4-3 Leicester" on the new shiny scoreboard and everybody will be happy.

Consett taught us a lesson in the fundamentals of heading it, kicking it, passing it and making a tackle.