Jill

This match is just one big

Williamson's swing-and-a-miss, ffs. What a spoon.

Hutton is a fucking world beater today.

Cabella man stop being a mincer.

I feel sorry for the fans of other clubs stuck watching this shite in the pub before their own match.

I wasn't going to drink until much later on in the day but I'm having a rum & cola already. I've been bored into submission. Is there someone in row Z that our players particularly want to donate a football to?

We look absolutely rubbish.

I think my tuna sandwich is coming back up.

It seems so.

Anyone got any good snacks or drinks for the match then? I'm going to have a tuna sandwich and a pepsi max, might build up to a rum & coke depending on how the match goes.

2-1 win. N'Zogbia wanders through our defence & scores followed by a Dummett screamer from the halfway line and Willo from a set penis. Then I'll wake up and watch Fletch & Sav and actually see some of our fans in the Chilli.

This thing from the Chilli is bollocks like.

That's where I sat too. Cracking moment.

£1 anytime own goal in our match

Look at Micky's little face. He's loving this.

On that Match of the Day special last night it was lovely to see that goal v Everton again. I seemed to be celebrating before he even kicked the ball, it was so obviously going in.

What a way to welcome the thread back.

All I know is that everyone seems to be saying it's my fault. On the bright side, that makes you the exact opposite of Pardew. Never his fault, always yours.

That miss.

Lovely Wolfsburg goal there.

Derby, Boro, Wigan, Preston

This is the reward for the fans who have to endure a 4am bonking by Stoke. It's not much to ask Interesting definition of reward.. but I'll let you have this one since it's away from home so at least I don't have to leave the house.

I'm more than happy to help but I don't have the first clue about organising a football tournament. One of the regular reds v blues/NOFC people would probably be best as the Apprentice-style Project Manager.

I absolutely hate it when we're in this kick-off slot.