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Not worthy of a thread - 2018 FIFA World Cup edition

OzzieMandias

by OzzieMandias
in Football

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Fedyan

Fedyan

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Posted

Oh. My. God. Them forrin forrins are everywhere. Walking around my beloved Moscow in their forrin ways, talking their forrin lingo. Drinking our booze, taking pictures everywhere. So many forrins. So glad I leave on Sunday, a freaking forrin invasion, like.

 

I saw a dude dressed up as an Aztec. What in the world. I mean, he did wear those Aztec decorated underpants. An adult. And those Mexican hats. Man, hats must be sensible. These are just daft. And the amount of beer they consume. Jesus. And they all have their fan IDs with them, as though our God-fearing people who have work to do on a weekday can not spot a lazy jobless forrin acting all forrin.

 

Saw a rented van with Fox Deportes on it. Those Latino dudes, already causing trouble, damaging our property.

 

Saw a guy over the age of 50 in Peru shirt with a bleeping selfie stick. I mean, I'm pretty sure those things are illegal, unless your name is Christian Vieri. Or you're a woman.

 

Saw Saudis taking pictures in front of Hooters, I kid you not. What the hell is that all about? Those forrins.

 

Obviously, those Aussies take some beating in being loud, annoying and very forrin. My Lord, people, why the hell do you write in English if you clearly have no desire/ability to speak it? And that clobber. Hipster scum. Any time I see a grown man with neck tattoos I think of the parents. Even Aussie parents don't deserve that kind of crap. What in the world? And their athletes, probably deemed unskilled to play rugby and that other horror show with eggchasing they so adore, are so friendly. Something fishy. Nobody understand a word of what they're saying.

 

And those Colombians. Walking in a Hermes boutique as if they have any money. The sheer arrogance. And how dare they bring their women with them? Oh, the unbearable hardship of having to stare at those behinds. Give me strength, like.

 

Saw a guy in Uruguay shirt and Nacional scarf take a selfie in front of Belarus Embassy. Doesn't he know that they eat babies and consume insane amounts of potatoes there. Man.

 

And those Americans. What in the heavens name. You didn't even qualify FFS. Why bother coming over and sip our magnificent spirits, looking at us in that forrin way. The cheek. Drooling at our subway. Yeah, sorry, no rats and roaches and bums are being shot on the spot if they attempt to enter. And that accent. Brought so many memories of the horrible experiences I had over there. Trump boys. Obama boys. Liberal so and so's. Surprised about the distinct lack of bears and snow, are we. Capitalist wrongdoers, like. And so many old people among them. And families. Who in their right mind would bring his wife and kids to a World Cup? Then again, maybe all those forrin gay guys. Trying to brainwash us with their fancy sissy forrin ways. Pretending to be on solids with wife and kids. Suspicious yanks, like. Genuinely disgusting. Pathetically friendly. Stop smiling, you unreasonable Uncle Sam worshippers. It is illegal here, don't you know. Good thing we have like a ton of nukes. Just in case. Can never have too many rockets. Not with these tools around. Oh, my Lord.

 

A friend of mine had a business trip to St Petersburg. And forrins are there as well. Tons of the ferkers. Like, literally hordes of them. On a flight home, some dude from Uruguay annoyed my comrade so much, that he had to give him his number and invite him to our patriotic Spain Portugal wine party. Are they all like that over there? Nobody cares where Montevideo is, like. What the hell is a Montevideo anyway? A tech megastore by the sounds of it. Leave us alone, you forrin. The guy probably will not even bother to bring money with him, so we'll have to silently pay for his rounds. I mean, they clearly have no money. Those forrins. Infesting our planes. Talking to us. Forcing us to invite them to our favorite restaraunts.

 

Some Nigerian dudes wanted to bring a live hen with them to the stadium in Kaliningrad. I mean, my prayers with our brave police officers over there. Them Africans and their forrin voodoo ways. But, to be fair, awesome fashion sense. Those hats. Mexico, take note. Never had much of a problem with African people, personally. But they still forrin. A father of my classmate actually fought for the good cause in Angola, helping them fight the meddling a of all those Portuguese and Americans. But they still ended up siding with the West. Holy this and that. Bring more hats, we love them. Not gonna wear them, obviously. That's too forrin, but at least you are not as annoying as those Argentinians.

 

Argentinians. Man. Loud. Singing songs. Making funny faces. We aren't allowed to do it in public, you thick mugs. And did you bring any clothes? Other than number 10 Argentina shirt, I mean. And your wine is expensive here. I go Chilean. But a good thing they did not make it. Imagine all those Vidal haircuts. Our elderly people would be outraged. Do they all sing all the time over there? Learn how to properly pronounce your Italian last names, you Argentinian forrins. Jesus Christ.

 

And Germans. How bland and forrin are they. Be reasonable, or else. My late grandpa used to serve in special forces in Dresden back in the day. He would probably teach you cabbage botherers a few lessons in being humble. Unearthing that Tokyo Hotel freak show on us all. Absolute garbage, like. Oh, why didn't you keep the good old DDR. All Western now. Vomit inducing. As I said, be very careful, sausage munchers. Genetic memory is very strong among us and all. Be nice and quiet, and stop using your disgusting forrin pornographic language. Dogs barking, like. And what's with all those flags of clubs nobody ever heard of? What the hell is Bochum? And stop thinking like we love your Mercedes and BMW. We just drive them. And we only consume large numbers of your lager because it goes handy when dealing with a hangover. You forrin Germans. So forrin, like.

 

And them Brazilians. Don't even get me started on them. Ok, granted, your women have lovely derrières. But wearing all those Cruzeiro, Fluminense, Vasco, Gremio and Corinthians shirts in public? And why do you all wear fancy forrin bermudas? No wonder your pretty girls run away to Italy and France. No style at all. And aren't they like so forrin forrin? Like real forrin. And some black dudes among them too. No doubt about it, came to sexually assault our girls. I swear, I almost lost it when one of these particular forrins asked a police officer to take a picture of them in front of a church. These are our churches, like. I mean, I don't believe in God and all. But our God is better than yours. Obviously. Aren't you all pagan and stuff?

 

And the Dutch. Yes, them. Marijuana smoking, sex altering, tall, ugly coonts. We will have a beer shortage by the end of the week. Because of these forrins. You did not make it, boys. Your team is not here. Stay the hell away from drugs and that urine you call Heineken. No sane individual goes to a tournament when his team is not there. So why did you bother? Hello, anybody home? Obviously came here to fight the Germans. Can't say I blame them for that. But then again, who does? But will make us look bad cos them pinko Western liberals will report it as our boys kicking the hell out of them. Again. Or maybe, they came to fight the Belgians. Disgusting nation, obviously. Deserve everything bad coming their way purely for their minuscule restrooms and frying everything that can be eaten. And that movie about Brugge. And Roberto Martinez. But why do it here? Should have stayed in one of your stinking Terdams. With your she-male prossies. Oh lord, those forrins.

 

And Iranians. Wearing Argentina shirts. That's like wearing "I am like really thick, me" shirt. What in the world.

 

And those Algerians. All hipsters, are we. Washing those beards, I hope. And what's with all that tracksuit fashion sense. And why the hell do you all speak like those garlic eating, surrendering French forrins? What the hell is that? They kicked you out and you decided to come over here? Oh, those forrins.

 

And the French. Those berets. So gay, like. Why such a strong scent of urine in the Paris subway? You lot burnt my hometown in 1812, when that Corsican dwarf was in power, you stinky cheese producing weapons. You think we forgot? Two years after that you learned what Bistro means in Russian, in your own forrin Paris to boot. I mean, they speak like really annoying teeny girls as well. Pardon this, merci that. Oh man, those forrins.

 

Why would any rational adult ever admit to being Canadian? Why admit it here? Do you lot even play football? It's pronounced about, not aboot. What's with all those Eh's at the end of every sentence? Bragging about your hockey, are we. Well, you may have invented it, but we play it better, with that panache and skill. Your players are just ugly thugs. And stop eating our steaks, like. No meat in Canada? Jesus Christ, I swear. On of these days, one of these days.

 

An Egyptian dude wearing that Pharaoh thing on his head. Visibly well over 40 years of age. I mean, come on.

 

A group of some sort of Spanish spaniards speaking so loud, you could probably hear them all the way in their forrin Spanish Madrid. And what's with all that facial piercing. You're forrin and thus ugly, why make it worse? Oh, man. So many bizarre forrins everywhere.

 

A guy drinking our beer with Portugal shirt on, talking on the phone in that some kind of Spanish they speak over there with a ton of Shhhhh sounds.

 

And those boys from Poland. Why so many of you are bald? Some sort of SKA-punk fashion statement? And no, that Shhhhhhhh sound you lot use all the time is also very audible, no reason to pretend that you are local. Those cunning forrins.

 

Other than that, I am well chuffed.  :lol:

 

Starts today.

 

Can not wait.

 

 

 

 

 

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Disco

Disco

Posted
Posted

That Yekaterinburg stadium finally makes sense...

 

“Of course I saw all the reactions,” said Oleg Gak, the chief architect on the project

 

Antisemite!!!

 

It's slang for cocaine.

 

Anyhoo, I'll be in the stall admiring these fine works for the next few hours.

 

Dfpa4CHXUAAPXUa.jpg:large

 

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