Most amusing excuses for losing a football match

[nufcjb]

28 minutes ago, HTT II said:

Neesy isn’t that old man.

Appologies. Was referring to Pardew.

[Yorkie]

Pardew was such a fucking prick man, God. I still really cared at that point too. Bruce is obviously a piece of shit and I dare say if you swapped the two around in the timeline to accord with my general interest towards the club, I'd hate him more, cos he's a proper fucking arsehole, no doubt about it. But 2013-15, Pardew was the one. He'll always be peak hate for me. 

[gjohnson]

Benevento president blamed witches for his team losing 12 in a row a few years back

[gjohnson]

Blackpool blaming Nelson's ghost for losing 96 playoff

[Jaqen]

Ukrain blaming frogs keeping them up all night when they got hammered by Spain. 

[Superior Acuña]

Gordon Strachan as Scotland manager: 'genetically, we are behind'

[Mattoon]

1 hour ago, Yorkie said:

Pardew was such a fucking prick man, God. I still really cared at that point too. Bruce is obviously a piece of shit and I dare say if you swapped the two around in the timeline to accord with my general interest towards the club, I'd hate him more, cos he's a proper fucking arsehole, no doubt about it. But 2013-15, Pardew was the one. He'll always be peak hate for me. 

 

Apathy has surely dissolved some of the hate that Bruce is deserving of. Pardew started the dampening of ambition and belittling the club, Bruce has just picked up the mantle and ran (ironic) with it, but he's not a southerner, he should know better. 

[Dancing Brave]

 Kenny Dalglish said the ball was to "bouncy" when he was our manager v Stevenage in the FA Cup back in 1998

 

Alan Hansen blamed the 1989 title decider 2-0 defeat to Arsenal on it being played on a Friday.

 

 

 

[Robster]

Tottenham blaming Lasagne.

[Robster]

Barry Fry blaming a Gypsy's curse so pissed on the four corner flags of St Andrews to try and lift it.

[Lazarus]

i remember when the predator boots came in everyone was moaning about them, players, managers, fans, everyone.

[Astroblack]

Pardew using Cabaye’s departure as a scapegoat all the way till the day he left us. 

[geordie_b]

10 hours ago, gjohnson said:

Yeah he is, we heard some truly inspired creations from him. We've heard some true whoppers from everyone of our managers since Souness (don't recall how he explained that Wigan match where three of our players all ran in to each other. Also recall blaming the new balls for being too bouncy when Stevenage held us to a draw in the FA cup) but is it a case of we just don't hear or pay attention to what others pass off as excuses?

 

 

Pretty sure it turned out that the balls we used that day were endorsed by Kenny Dalglish 

[geordie_b]

13 minutes ago, ManDoon said:

Say it again! 

 whoops

[Mike]

11 hours ago, B-more Mag said:

 

 

It was such clean burning, green hate. A field of wind turbines and solar panels. Infinite reserves. Hating Bruce is like listening to an dogshit Oldsmobile turn over and choke smoke out the exhaust. Forced as fuck. The club is dead and hating it feels like a formality.