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Football pet hates


Guest JonnyRogers

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Guest slimbob

Those stupid sky adverts for big matches, usually manu arsenal, where they try and big it up as some sort of war, usually by showing some crunching tackles with some lord of the rings style music playing in the background

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couldn't see if anyone else mentioned it but...

 

DAVID FUCKING PLEAT

 

How FUCKING hard is it to pronounce EVERY fucking players name..jesus h. tapdancing fucking christ david......

 

Last time i heard him commentate on us...he ever managed to fucking get MARTINS WRONG by saying something like "martaaanz"...HOW FUCKING HARD IS IT DAVID?

 

How hard?...goddamn that fucking wanker...

 

Aaaah that's better  :buck2:

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Those stupid sky adverts for big matches, usually manu arsenal, where they try and big it up as some sort of war, usually by showing some crunching tackles with some lord of the rings style music playing in the background

 

and going to the adverts seconds before kick off is about to start

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Guest JonnyRogers

Haha david pleat!! every game he does starts with "Good evening everybody!" - that's irritating! Also agree with the Oliver/Motson/Tylesley comments

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easy easy easy easy easy

 

rosicky being pronounced rositski

 

youve never won fuck all...... that actual mean you have won stuff as its a double negative

 

soccer

 

Steve 'Twat' Bennett

 

Newcastle Cliches being used by commentators

 

United

 

Kevin Nolan and his merry bunch of cheats

 

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Guest Knightrider

Fans: Fickle fans, arrogant fans, thick fans, impatient fans, snobby fans.

 

The game: Cheating, excuses, cliches (I know), money, agents, ticket prices, TV saturation, hype, late and early kick-off times, fixture meddling, injuries, bias, UEFA, FIFA, The FA, the Premier League, shite games, merchandise, stadium food, stadium beverages, shit commentators and pundits, atmospheres, new stadiums, some footy kits, goal music, cheerleaders, foam hands, our DJ, Soccer AM, or rather Tim Lovejoy, London, early leavers, latecomers, booing, Mark Lawrenson, female spectators screeching and mobile phone use, stewards, all-seater stadiums, sitting, match day programmes, the Americanisation of the game and crying Geordies.

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Guest Bellers

The "Soccer AM" brigade - The circus that is. Fans that chant "easy, easy, easy" and other moronic lyrics and generally act the clown need to f*** of back to primary school, embarassing.

 

Cheats - Wankers that dive or go over like they've been clubbed should be banned from the game for a lengthy period, they might think twice then.

 

Americanisation - Such as playing music after a goal is scored, for fucks sake lads don't call it soccer either...

 

Ticket Prices - Only so long before the man on the street can't afford a ticket...

 

Glory Supporters - What's the point? "Yeah, I've supported Chelsea all me life" yeah likely story...

 

John Motson - What a horribly annoying voice he has, get the f*** off my telly...

 

Inept Managers - Bloody hell, everybody else can see your getting it wrong and your being paid millions, why bother?

 

Inept officials - How can 50,000 fans spot a dive and one f****** moron miss it from yards away?

 

Jeff Winter - How the f*** such a smug w****** can tell others how to do their job when he couldn't do his own is beyond me.

 

The billionaire invasion - Your ruining the game and have turned the sport we love into a buisness...

 

Moving kick off time - Four o'clock on a sunday afternoon, they're having a f****** laugh aren't they?

 

The "prawn sandwhich brigade" - Yes I am singing, swearing and cheering my team on, stop looking at me as if I'm a f****** loon...

 

Kuyt being pronounced as "Cowt" - It's not difficult, pronounce it right for fucks sake...

 

Governing Bodies - Inept the lot of them, stop passing the book and sort it out...

 

Mark "Lawro" - What mind numbingly annoying b****** he is, how does he keep his job?

 

Wayne Rooney - Swearing at officials, diving, oh and overhyped aswell...

 

Agents- The game doesn't need horrible bastards such as yourselves, f*** off...

 

"Grand Slam Sunday" - Such a massive hype for such a boring day of football.

 

Channel Five commentry team - Man, if was that bad at my job I'd be long gone, timefor a change me thinks...

 

...and that's just scratching the surface!

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Richard Keys in general, but especially him trying to big up abysmal games:

 

"Today we've got the big one from the JJB. Wigan v Sheffield United. And when these two go toe to toe, you can expect fireworks!"

 

 

:knuppel2:

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Glory Supporters - What's the point? "Yeah, I've supported Chelsea all me life" yeah likely story...

 

What I hate are the excuses for it, where they make out they have no choice but to support Liverpool or Man U, in spite of being born and living miles away - "I've got family from Manchester", "My Dad supports Liverpool"

 

So if they lived in Liverpool and their dad was from Hull, would half of these idiots support Hull?  Would they f***. 

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Guest Knightrider

I don't mind shite refs or dubious decisions, in a sport that is over regulated (yellow cards for celebrating a game), a game fast being played and managed by robots, I like the controversy and the whole ups and downs of the game that bad decisions create. As the cliche goes, they really do even themselves out at the end anyway.

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I don't mind s**** refs or dubious decisions, in a sport that is over regulated (yellow cards for celebrating a game), a game fast being played and managed by robots, I like the controversy and the whole ups and downs of the game that bad decisions create. As the cliche goes, they really do even themselves out at the end anyway.

 

Agreed, nothing better than a dodgy decision going your way. That's the game.

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Guest Knightrider

I don't mind s**** refs or dubious decisions, in a sport that is over regulated (yellow cards for celebrating a game), a game fast being played and managed by robots, I like the controversy and the whole ups and downs of the game that bad decisions create. As the cliche goes, they really do even themselves out at the end anyway.

 

Agreed, nothing better than a dodgy decision going your way. That's the game.

 

Exactly, one day they'll go against you, the next it will be the other team on the wrong end of a bad decision. As you say, that's the game, always has been and always will be regardless. That is why I'm against the overuse of technology. Refs are afterall only human and it isn't as if they are the only ones who make mistakes, players and managers make far more point costing mistakes, and they are paid fortunes where as a referee isn't. Plus, how many times has bad refereeing decisions ignited a lacklustre atmosphere at SJP which has helped the lads to some points?

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Commentators pretending that everyone doesn't secretly like seeing footballers kicking off and having girly slappy pushy fights.  "No-one likes to see that in football" Oh come on, before all the players and half the bench started wading in after that tackle no-one in the pub was even watching this shite 2nd division nowts each draw.

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Commentators pretending that everyone doesn't secretly like seeing footballers kicking off and having girly slappy pushy fights.  "No-one likes to see that in football" Oh come on, before all the players and half the bench started wading in after that tackle no-one in the pub was even watching this shite 2nd division nowts each draw.

 

Of course they fucking do want to see it. :lol:

 

It's the same with streakers and pitch invasions. They get so high and mighty about it in this country, in Europe they zoom in for a good look at the chebs on show!

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Was gonna say the Channel 5 UEFA Cup coverage, but the hilarity of their patheticness puts an entertaining swing on Levadia, Ventspils, and no doubt, Zulte-type games.

 

It's fun making tallies with the Channel 5 commentators, aswell. Like how many times Joe Royle can say 'outstanding' in one game, or how long it'll be before Jon Helm mentions 'James Milner' and 'Leeds' in the same sentence.

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Was gonna say the Channel 5 UEFA Cup coverage, but the hilarity of their patheticness puts an entertaining swing on Levadia, Ventspils, and no doubt, Zulte-type games.

 

It's fun making tallies with the Channel 5 commentators, aswell. Like how many times Joe Royle can say 'outstanding' in one game, or how long it'll be before Jon Helm mentions 'James Milner' and 'Leeds' in the same sentence.

 

I love the way the C5 commentators love Peter Ramage, they think he's a good player!

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Was gonna say the Channel 5 UEFA Cup coverage, but the hilarity of their patheticness puts an entertaining swing on Levadia, Ventspils, and no doubt, Zulte-type games.

 

It's fun making tallies with the Channel 5 commentators, aswell. Like how many times Joe Royle can say 'outstanding' in one game, or how long it'll be before Jon Helm mentions 'James Milner' and 'Leeds' in the same sentence.

 

I love the way the C5 commentators love Peter Ramage, they think he's a good player!

 

Shattap. ;)

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