Spider Jerusalem

Mike Ashley, what an utter, utter bell-end. Is he actually trying to relegate us again?

Posts more than ten words. Not reading that shit. Fuck.

Another excellent goal. What's going on here.

Fucking jeebus

Definitely the worst shirt we've had since this beauty. http://i44.tinypic.com/dyavr4.jpg Whoever has signed it off is trying to see how many people really will throw money at anything black and white IMHO.

I agree, whoever owns that camera needs to fucking shoot themseleves. Awful, awful picture.

At least it keeps Carlton Cole out of his thinking. He's only 6 feet 3 13⁄64 inches tall.

Don't forget that Shearer and Ferdinand, while not being dwarves, were not exactly freakish giants either at 6 foot and just under six foot respectivley, and both slightly shorter than any of our first choice centre halves this season. As has been noted earlier a lot of ability to score from a corner is related to the aggression from the players attacking the ball.

If we get relegated next year Pardew MAY get peddled. There may be three teams worse than us next season. We may not have a load of transfer requests over the summer. The management may figure out how to get our players playing withing some form of cohesive system. We may score from a corner sometime next season. The Earth may be struck by a massvie asteroid sometime in the next couple of months so we do not have to witness the abomination of what other teams have named football. I may be able to spell the word within without adding a trailing fucking 'g' I know which of these is the most likely.

I'd say the only time we were in a worse position was the season we were actually relegated. I was quite chipper that pre-season tbh. I was being very literal, but at least there were some reasons to be positive that summer. Pardew still being in charge just makes it feel as if we've dodged the bullet this year and then went back to the shooter to give them a full AK47 to try again.

I'd add 2nd lowest points accumulated in a Premier League season 2nd lowest League position in a Premier League season Made Sunderland look like fucking Brazil circa 1970

I'd say the only time we were in a worse position was the season we were actually relegated.

looks like a Village People tribute act. Without any doubt THE worst badge of any football club in any league in any country on any planet in this or any other universe.

Can't argue with any of that. And if anyone does they're an utter fucking dick.

The worrying thing is that after the 'clear the air' talks this week Carr's remit may be trying to pinpoint players that suit this charlatans view of football, i.e. experienced, jumping tacklers.

Your conclusion about Pardew might be right, but this argument doesn't make sense. The whole point of stability is that one season to the next isn't the only thing that matters. It's not exactly fucking stable either. Lets try and make it clear to make you understand then. We have just had the second worst season in our premier league history in terms of league position. The fans in the ground have no problem with this. A sure sign for the give it another go next year, it might get better with any luck. Fifth bottom again, stability is the thing.

Fifth top to fifth bottom? The only stability the owner is botherd about is the stupor in the stands by the look of it.

We can expect this style of reporting from the Chronic and Journal for the next few months then. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Du0d8QxlSYk

As expected. Ashley taking a gamble that either Pardew can take onboard his own failings this season or there will be three teams more ghastly than us next year.

Along the RELEGATIONOMETER please. Forget this season has happened and start over again.

The counter-attack goals stat is woeful - not just this year but 7 goals in the past three seasons.

I wouldn't bother, he's actually bored me into submission. See Grandpa Simpson gif. I was actually thinking more of the Seinfeld gif.

I wouldn't bother, he's actually bored me into submission.

SOOPAFAN!!! I've been here longer so I'm using the seniority card so there. You are just collateral damage, but obviously have a guilty conscience. I can understand why people have avoided this part of the board like a plague due to the very toxic atmosphere, but at least you've added to the debate. I've just got an aversion to the reappearance of a few with nothing more to do than say 'HURR HURR look at this dick'.