Baron von Fat

It's amazing how much debate can be spawned by an article such as this. Over and over again, taloid rumours turn out to be false, but yet no one seems to learn.

Aye, but he's been blatantly eyeing up his secretary for months now. And when he last scored with us apparently he didn't seem that enthusiastic...

Right now our supporters are playing the needy girlfriend role to Owen's attractive gentleman. "Tell me you love me! Tell me again! I don't believe you!"

Don't put too much stock in that. Tides turn after every match around here.

should suit each other perfectly those two. Should be them two in the middle for every home game when fit maybe im just thick but why every home game? why would we have to change tactics purely because of the stadium we are playing in? Does this seriously require explanation? Teams playing at home tend to be a little more agressive going forward, and depending on the quality of that team, it may require us to adjust tactics to prepare for that. Also, a partisan crowd can affect players' performances.

This one was absolute murder. I cheated hard, and would never have got the mystery midfielder without doing so.

Sorry. Can you at least unedit my b******? Done. I have swear filtering on, but I gave it my best guess...

This thread is fun. Can people please refrain from putting the answers in the thread, however? Thanks.

Big Sam has come out and pledged that Owen will play Sunday.

I got that one - but I never thought of him as a left back. I'm missing the striker (4) and the (3) in midfield. EDIT: Got it in 7+. Can't believe I forgot those two!

I disagree with HTT on this one. Ameobi was particularly shocking, even in comparison to the other players who struggled mightily. He simply could not trap a ball. The only performance that compared was N'Zogbia and his comedy set-pieces.

I think those penalties would have broken my arm.

Two hamstring injuries on the same day - what are the odds?

The bulk of this entire forum reminds me of that anecdote. Great post.

I think we need Faye. The most disappointing this about Smith's game for me has been his composure in the box. He's meant to be a striker, yet on the few occasions that he's popped up in the box after a good late arriving run, he's dribbled in some weak efforts on goal. I could forgive the rest if he was at least a goal threat. As is, he has some way to go to merit a place in the team when all are fit.

Agreed. You should definitely wait until they're in bed before you start sucking them off. see what i did there COMEDY AFTERTHOUGHT EDIT: You should also make them buy you dinner first.

Sorry Enrique! Both players that he thought would help him settle have left!

I want my centre backs to have hairstyles they've invented, to show their leadership qualities.

There isn't a dry eye in the Jesus household right now. What a thread!

Why do you all know so many people who make up stupid sightings?

You know your club (San Jose, I assume) is coming back next year, right?

Good player with bad injury luck, but not necessarily injury prone. I've seen him play many times. His game resembles Alan Smith's, though his range of passing is better, and he's a real box-to-box midfielder rather than a converted striker. He's a bit of a bling boy, though...

Whatever his name is he's started brightly again - best player on the pitch according to the commentary team.

Yes.

BBC Radio believes that Solano is at RB as well.