Ronaldo

Need to change this, mind. Losing our grip on the game completely.

Aye - been quiet. No clue what you're both on about, like. He's been good. Typical Ronaldo response. Calm down. Perfectly calm. You're just a bit wrong, mate.

Aye - been quiet. No clue what you're both on about, like. He's been good.

I think it's time for Mitro.

The shark has arrived and you're about to jump, man.

We're winning away in a season where all that matters is points, but I do hate this 'compact at all times, defensive wingers' stuff. It sounds simplistic but we sometimes need to just put shit like this to the sword.

Fair play to him, brilliant strike.

Stoic, straight-talking Nigel Pearson telling his players to dive now.

For the love of Christ let us get promoted, man. I can't take much more of this fucking coverage.

He's still shit.

God will you all shut up. It's fucking Barnsley.

Don't be so stupid, man. F E A R the Barnsley.

We've always had better options.

Colback and Alsoran, man. The rest is good.

George Friend starting games in the PL. Honestly.

I think Chris Kamara's having a stroke.

Christ +1.

De Bruyne's unstoppable, man. What a player.

Kaka and Carr, ffs. It's embarrassing. Not one Carr-scouted player has done owt in football besides contribute to our relegation - and I obviously don't include international players we'd all heard of in that. Not to mention his role in appointing Steve McClaren when we had 6 months to get pretty much any unemployed or contractually vulnerable manager we wanted. Move on, man.

Only if you discount about 3 of them, mind.

Doesn't make any sense on any level.

It's absolutely staggering how much braindead defending you see in the Championship, like.

I can't see what's funny either, to be fair.

We've got a much better sitting midfielder in the squad now, though.

'Why not' is a joke now?