bobbydazzla

Doing shitloads of bugle

not quite up there with Marcelino’s catalogue of injuries yet, but he’s getting close

Probably the same reason we haven’t stepped in and bought all of Brighton’s targets Different clubs, different needs

I’ve seen the lawyers get involved in middle management jobs The actions of a Director of a high profile football club will be far more visible and open to scrutiny

Froggy’s on the wind up man Sat in his yellow & green striped y-fronts dangling juicy maggots

Restrictive covenants / gardening leave are legal agreements. Not just a nod and a wink that they won’t be in contact with their new employer Any commercially sensitive dialogue at all between him and Man U people in relation to his new role will see him banged to rights by the lawyers But you probably already know that and are just on the wind up, you pesky little scamp

Good Lord. Whatever next. Bruno out for 18 months because he’s snapped his banjo string ?

Entrance to all football stadiums denied unless wearing:

- Scrap VAR - 3 subs - If player has a minor injury, go off the pitch for treatment - Ban LED boards - No shirt numbers over 30 allowed - Keepers have to wear 1 or 12 - 50% of stadium capacity is standing - Scrap FFP - New strips every 2 seasons - No music after goals - No announcer shouting players name after goals - Ban jester hats - Maximum 2 mins taking vids / pics on phone in stadium or face lifetime ban - Scrap Europa Conf / League - Bring back UEFA cup - Only food in grounds is pies - Bars in ground close when players are on pitch - No season tickets at NUFC - Away games available to members at NUFC - No ballots - No allocated seating - Fastest dancer competition at 1/2 time - Slow down songs - Fans not allowed to copy other teams songs - Kick off times must allow fans to be able to travel back to home town on train - No over knee socks - No shin height socks - No holes cut in socks - Anyone leaving stand on 35 or 80 mins gets lifetime ban - Less injury time - Teams not allowed to play 3x in 7 days - Maximum squad sizes (incl u18’s etc) - Clive Tyldesley banned - Neville banned from commentating on Man Utd - Carragher banned from commentating on Liverpool - Robbie Savage banned from TV - Maximum sacked manager payout of £500,000 - Stadium attendance figures to be qualified by drone footage of stadium at 20 mins into game - Show all top flight games on telly in UK if available overseas - Players must have surname on shirt, not first name or nickname - Ban any reference to 6’s, 10’s, 8’s, false 9’s, pivots, xG, inverted wingers

Any noisy massive lads fans get forced to work backshift at Nissan on match days marra Management are all undercover Mags

Onana catches the ball without dropping it and Neville is rimming his hoop like he’s better than Gordon Banks

Andy Cuntcliffe

Trippier playing defensive midfielder is like having a new signing

The lack of any crowd noise during the entire game was even worse Could hear the players shouting to each other City might as well cancel having fans in the stadium and just ram every inch of the ground full of LED advertising boards instead

Thought I’d accidentally hit the mute button on the telly remote just then, was absolute silence in the ground

Possibly so, but I was conceived in '77 and wasn't playing footy on the streets in the Heath years

You try to explaining that to a gang of little Geordie radgies playing 7 a side with a caser ball on waste ground with jumpers for goalposts in Thatchers Britain Rush keeper - the kid in goal has approval to also play outfield and it’s agreed he won’t get paggered for doing it by either his own team or the opposition Fog man back - anyone can be keeper, but only the 1st defender to reach the goalmouth can handle the ball without getting paggered by the opposition Any other interpretations are sheer lunacy

To be fair to the Roses, Mani is proper Man Utd. Here he is (45 secs) in the 80's being interviewed after a night spent scrapping with West Ham on a ferry https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4h2_gOY2pBo

Man Utd x Stone Roses colab. MANCHESTER IN THE AREA WE'RE INTERNATIONAL WE'RE CONTINENTAL Imagine if Adidas do us a Lets Get Ready to Rhumble shirt

Rush keeper = goalie can be an outfield player Fog man back = anyone can be goalie if they’re the last man in defence Any other interpretation is quite simply utter nonsense

Indeedly doodly, have lobbed an application in Will be dusting off all my best and favourite swearwords ready for when when they ask me what I think of the ballot / allocated seating