bobbydazzla

When it comes to transfer bullshit on Twatter, there are known knowns; there are things we know we know. We also know there are known unknowns; that is to say we know there are some things we do not know. But there are also unknown unknowns—the ones we don't know we don't know. And if one looks throughout the recent history of our club, it is the latter category that don’t get kyboshed by having their own thread created way too early.

no it does not you’re talking codswallop

Dewsbury-Hall is at Chelsea What the fuck If you went into the chill out area at Cobham and slipped a hand down the back of the sofa, you’d find at least 5 or 6 players amongst the crumbs and loose change

Come in here to see if this cunt has signed yet, end up down a quantum mechanics thought experiment concerning quantum superposition rabbit hole Fucksake

Learnt everything I needed to know about photoshop from a self-facilitating media node who was my mentor when I interned at Trashbat.co.ck in the early 00’s

And Arthur Fowler can pilfer the money from the Olise sale

Raiders of the Lost Cunt Silence of the Cunt Schindlers Cunt A Fish Called Cunt Beverly Hills Cunt

Wait What An absolutely key part of their decision making is for Darren Eales to log into N-O to see if the expert scouts, expert stat nonces, expert FFP nonces, expert tactics nonces and expert transfer negotiators all approve of deal Why’s Eddie not mentioning that ?

Massive incentive for me would be that if we sign him then this insane thread can get locked and frozen in carbonite like Han Solo then dumped into the North Sea off the side of the DFDS ferry and it’ll never be opened again We can then start a brand new thread called NUFC’s Marc Guehi: Aerial Duels Won / Lost

Stream of consciousness writing You’re the Jack Kerouac of the transfer thread

Holy smokes, that needs some paragraphs

Can add Brexit Jim to that list anarl

What’s your superstition based on ? For 41 years you’ve gone through that turnstile and we’ve won games, lost games, drawn games, been relegated and added precisely nowt to our trophy cabinet Be interested to know what you think might happen if you use a different one

Real Madrid away. Fucksake

Rubber all day long on a ZX Spectrum Alternative is to get on the C64 and furiously waggle my joystick until it snaps

Nah, I'll be sunning myself by a Mediterranean pool this weekend so not needed to try for any tickets But been keeping my F5 key bashing skills honed over the summer by playing Daley Thompson's Decathlon on an old ZX Spectrum Can't be starting a new season with my fingerblasting digit in sub-optimal condition

Gor blimey Parish me old china, that ah kosher barnet or you ‘avin a bubble bowlin’ abaht in a syrup what you got off of Ace Ventura My ol’ mans a dustman, knees up muvva Brahhn etc etc

If Palace demand more than the upper limit that our bean counters and transfer committee think we should pay for him, then we move on We can't force Palace (or any club) to sell their asset and I trust NUFC to have made the right decision and not end up going daft inna Will Grigg stylee But for the Palace chairman to go on telly and publicly discuss what we believe is an ongoing transfer negotiation, well that's just wideboy antics. This wasn't his gaffer in a presser getting asked about the transfer, it was a premeditated media move Do your business behind closed doors you fucking spiv

SLAMS shut. It always SLAMS shut. It never just shuts

If I had to guess which of our players would want to live in a dessert it'd be Bruno the Kinder Beuno guzzler aka Sweet Tooth Guimaraes

and 99% of the time the crumb of news that sends people into a frenzy is just some Twatter bollocks that’s been posted by a journo or fake ITK for clicks n giggles

Giggs is in the starting line up too