Pilko

Forster Beye Edgar Diatta Kadar Milner LuaLua Butt Godsmark Carroll Martins Worth doing just to see Fergie's face turn purple

Why do you think that is? No, one of Smith or Carroll replaces Viduka depending on whether KK deems it an appropraite situation to put Carroll in. Local derby, 2-0 and coasting, yes. Edgy away game, 2-2, pinned back a bit, no.

Didn't realize that was possible! I remember during Wigan (h), the ball got punted forwards by Taylor and Viduka looked at where the ball was rolling, 35 yards in front of him, and kind of mouthed "no way."

Oh and Banega ifb.

Newcastleitis

Wouldn't want to sign Jones to replace Viduka. He will be found out as average next year. 7 goals this season according to their website, which is the same as Viduka, but as their main centre forward. Why pay as much for him as they would undoubtedly want. Would be a complete waste of money. But Jones would offer us so much more than Viduka does, it's not just about how many goals he's scored but what a strong, pacey striker could do for our team in the formation we play, a player with his attributes is just what we need. What price would you put on a non-goalscoring centre forward, given that we already have Ameobi & Smith? How much do you think Jones would cost? He's nothing like Ameobi or Smith though, he isn't a prolific goal scorer but he makes up for it with the amount of assists he gets for his team mates (joint 6th in the Premiership with Bentley) and that's in a w*** Sunderland side, I'd fancy him to get plenty working with Martins and Owen instead of Chopra and Daryl Murphy. He's probably worth around the £12 million mark but I can't see Quinn or Keane being to keen to sell him to us, he has the sort of attributes we should be looking for in a Viduka replacement though, maybe that Gomis bloke is worth a look from St Ettienne. Are you for real? This is someone that was playing for Southampton in Sepember, and has looked average at best if you look past the crap surrounding him. Considering Modric went for £15m, you're talking out of your arse there I'm afraid.

See id disagree with that, Jones for me is one of the best target men in the Prem, he never falls over and he dominates defenders, even Faye had trouble containing him, he just lacked so much support, he excels at holding the ball up but his finishing and composure is still in question if you ask me. Would take him over Crouch. Fortunatley, it isn't up to you.

Stay, squad. We should sign a new target-man and keep Viduka (along with Carroll) as back up. Hopefully Carroll will be involved more next season though, Keegan clearly rates him more than Allardyce - he's been in almost every Keegan 16.

That bit on the Simpsons: "Do you come with the car new strip?

I don't care what he says about "protecting" youngsters, last game of the season would be a great game to start LuaLua, Carroll and Edgar (if he's OK), maybe start Forster and stick Kadar, Godsmark, Troisi, Soderberg and Tozer on the bench. Good chance to give them vital Premier League experience. XI against Everton on the final day: Forster Beye Taylor Edgar Enrique LuaLua Butt Barton Milner Owen Carroll Bench: Soderberg, Godsmark, Kadar, Troisi, Tozer Yes or no?

Man Of Yonder Match? Think so.

Poor Edgar

Mon the Edgar.

I agree. Looks dead tacky.

Despite Keegan playing Smith for the final 15/20 minutes recently I knew he'd throw Carroll on instead against Sunderland, as it meant so much to him. He deserves it as well after establishing himself as a first-team player this season. Hope to see him start a few games next year.

That's a great shout. Would be better than the likes of Smith or Ramage gurning at us from the computer screen.

To wipe your arse with? I'd use it as a jizz rag tbqh.

Bet it took you a while to write the "he should stay" bit

Schwarzer Halford McShane Sonko Baird O'Neil Savage Muamba Bouazza Earnshaw Smith

Haha noticed that as well. Tozer wants to go and see a dentist.

Hmm... Lampard, Ronaldo... I can see a pattern emerging. You're a chubby chaser, aren't you? [/sweeping generalization] Condolences to the Lampard family.

Alan Smith would be a perfect signing for them as well when Phat Scam takes over.

Jono Coleman as... http://bigrikcouk.brinkster.net/images/default_44.jpg Wally Downes http://img.dailymail.co.uk/i/pix/2007/01_wk4/wallydownes250107_228x349.jpg