Pilko

Used my Paddy Power booster on Return the Favour, 25/1.

Hoejberg and Bartley 18/1 Peltier and Snodgrass 25/1 Snodgrass and Moura 2+ SOT 130/1

Decent start - Cavani, DCL and Fabianski posting good scores. Still 8 players to go.

Anyone get on Tuanzebe quickly enough?

"The way wuh went about wah work" is his new thicko cliche.

Let's hope it's like Oba Martins away at Villa stretchered off with what was later described as a "severe dead leg".

9/1 is in. Another one would be frankly erotic. How much did you throw on that?

Lemina at 5/1 looks long considering who the ref is. Got the single and doubled with Dawson.

Thick, shit and fuck ugly. Can see why he's Bruce's man.

He just loves defending this lad. What a sub appearance that was.

They're really slow to update it today for some reason. It was 2-1 and they had no SOTs listed

Has a Marvellous chance now...

That's so sloppy from Arsenal

Pepe and Watkins 2+ SOT 15/1

How have we? He's been pretty consistently shite and we've phased him out of the squad. Frankly we should have done the same with loads of our others, only our gross incompetence to sign players has seen him return.

Pukki and Lowe 2+ SOT 13/1 Mad longshot - Fulton and Hanley card and SOT each - 340/1

Dier's a fucking fool isn't he

James and Hoejberg cards 22/1 Werner and Son 2+ 14/1 James, Hudson-Odoi, Hoejberg and Vinicius 1+ 51/1 James and Alonso 2+ 184/1

Lets set up an ideation meeting to really deep dive in to that. Can you make sure to diarise that for the morning because I have a hard stop at 12.

Ryan Fredericks playing further forwards tonight. 6/1 a SOT, 20/1 doubled with Lingard.

Ricardo Pereira 30/1 2+ SOT. Had 1 in the last game and gets forwards loads.

Must be lukewarm as fuck if he's able to hold one of those containers like that anarl. Horrid.

Southampton play Wolves twice in the next few weeks, nailed on Mason refs at least one given both teams have said they think he's shit

Not sure the owners will want to change the name of the club to Frank Lampard's Bournemouth either.

Harrison and Albrighton 2+ if both start