Pilko

Free £5er tonight on Raphinha 2+, Klich 1+ and Harrison 1+ SOT if they all play. About 24/1.

Can't wait to see Mount, Henderson and Rice start as we labour to a 0-0 draw with the jocks.

Basham SOT 12/1 my last poke at salvaging a cack weekend.

I liked the one with the two slappers who keep saying "tha goin threw!" despite it being a league game

Diagne for WBA could have them level here if he hadn't wandered offside like a Sunday morning player twice.

Hoejberg is unbelievably good.

Pereira 2+ SOT 25/1 Barnes, Traore, Soyuncu, Moutinho 1+ 160/1 Moutinho and Tielemans cards 33/1

Probably busy on the phone to Opta to find new ways to deny shots on target being classified the absolute fucking thieves.

Used my Paddy Power booster on Return the Favour, 25/1.

Hoejberg and Bartley 18/1 Peltier and Snodgrass 25/1 Snodgrass and Moura 2+ SOT 130/1

Decent start - Cavani, DCL and Fabianski posting good scores. Still 8 players to go.

Anyone get on Tuanzebe quickly enough?

"The way wuh went about wah work" is his new thicko cliche.

Let's hope it's like Oba Martins away at Villa stretchered off with what was later described as a "severe dead leg".

9/1 is in. Another one would be frankly erotic. How much did you throw on that?

Lemina at 5/1 looks long considering who the ref is. Got the single and doubled with Dawson.

Thick, shit and fuck ugly. Can see why he's Bruce's man.

He just loves defending this lad. What a sub appearance that was.

They're really slow to update it today for some reason. It was 2-1 and they had no SOTs listed

Has a Marvellous chance now...

That's so sloppy from Arsenal

Pepe and Watkins 2+ SOT 15/1

How have we? He's been pretty consistently shite and we've phased him out of the squad. Frankly we should have done the same with loads of our others, only our gross incompetence to sign players has seen him return.

Pukki and Lowe 2+ SOT 13/1 Mad longshot - Fulton and Hanley card and SOT each - 340/1

Dier's a fucking fool isn't he