Altamullan

Just teaching my (Manc) 7 year-old essential Geordie phrases so he is prepared for forthcoming hols with Gateshead cousins. He currently sounds like a cross between a South Central LA rapper and Happy Mondays Bez: "Yo-YO! Been do'nutting me bike in th' kaa peark...CITEH, CITEH..." (shit you not) He's nailed "why aye man; canny; nee bother; & ah divvent knaa." In honour of your dilemma Grant, I am adding 'geet' to his genetic-lexicon ( ). I'm not preaching, but can only encourage you to follow suit.

The question of what difference a manager can make, in footy or other 'team' activity, interests me. I do think that some 'teams' can vary in arange of important characteristics. Off teh top of my head, things like: how self-motivated/engaged with ‘the task’ they are, how much sense of team identity/camaraderie is present, how highly competent individuals are, how self-managing they are/how many natural leaders there are ‘on the pitch’, seem important. If this is right, then a manager’s impact could be quite irrelevant, or could actually mess-up an otherwise high functioning team. However, I assume that even the highest functioning team could be helped by an excellent manager/coach (Shankly came to mind for some reason) who (more often than not) gets the balance right between knowing when to say nowt/take them for a game of golf, and knowing when to take them apart. I think teams like Wenger’s Invincibles, or Dalglish’s Liverpool double-winners (when he was still playing/managing) would probably have done just as well without a manager, but worse with a crap one, particularly one who stamped his authority/made sure he had an influence.

West Ham 3-0 Sunderland Leicester 2-0 Norwich Southampton 1-0 Chelsea Stoke 2-0 Aston Villa Watford 2-1 Bournemouth West Brom 0-1 Crystal Palace Man Utd 0-1 Arsenal Spurs 2-0 Swansea

Anyone hear Carver on the radio today? He said that Colo is not a leader and that he only plays for himself. Both points were responses to leading questions, but still... . I think Janmaat is a leader, he has a bit of bottle and drive and I can imagine him as a good link between the English and the Dutch. Hope Steve nee-nuts has a change of perosnality; or has a change of captain thrust upon him.

Still think this, TBH. Though getting more twitchy about the Macnamaras... but more confident about Palarse.

All scores to be confirmed by Magpie. Week 26 A poor week scoring wise, we averaged 13.5, which is around three points below the norm. The Baggies unexpected (undeserved?) win at Everton didn’t help. All 26 of us went for a home win, and it was the most popular nomination (10). It returned a grand total of 2 points... It wasn’t just the Toffees’ banana-boots to blame though. Only 19% of our predictions returned more the 2 points; 2nd worst this season. There was only one 10-pointer (NUFC54, for the Arsenal double over Leicester) and 18 five pointers (six of which were for the same game). Suspect we’re going to see a change at the top. Magpie has maintained his good form, third highest scorer in last five weeks (95 points; joeyt second—passport needs well and truly renewed—on 96 points), and joint fourth highest scorer (62 points) in last three weeks (NUFC54, second on 68 points). However, BeloEmre has maintained a wonderful midseason run of form. Top scorer again this week. 124 points in five weeks, which is 42 points more than the average for the rest of us (82 pts), and 28 pts more than the next best. In fact, he has scored more points in the last three weeks (87) than 17 of us have scored in the last five! Phenomenal. Well done, you must be delighted. Turkish de... (can’t bring myself to type crap joke, at least not in full). In terms of the predictability of particular teams, Arsenal are still pissing it: averaging 67 points per game involving them (62 this week, but we were a player short). Man City are clinging on to second (58 ppg) with Spurs breathing down their neck (57 ppg). We are now 13th on 45 ppg, catching West Brom. We’ve definitely become more predicable (not to me, mind... or South Cheshire Toon [distance breeds loyalty... "I'd wark th' streets aal day, aal neet..."etc etc]) but unfortunately I suspect it mainly means predictably, and tremendously, s****. Lawro would have scored 14, and had his arse kicked off his guest Ed Skrein (20 pts). The BBC Sport Predictor game’s most popular scores would have also returned 14 pts, and our Malcolm in the Middle/Group Guess, 9 pts (ouch). Lawro’s total score would now be 464, leaving him falling adrift in third.

Can only imagine stark difference between Gini's home and way form is due to the manager's desire to play a certain way away. As others I would prefer it if we let our star midfielders keep playing and get used to each other. Hope we're a bit more positive today and give them problems to solve, rather than creating some tactics wank-fest which always strikes me as being more about managers self-importance/emperor's new clothes than truly effective football.

Sunderland 0-1 Man Utd Bournemouth 3-1 Stoke Crystal Palace 0-1 Watford Everton 2-0 West Brom Norwich 0-1 West Ham Swansea 1-1 Southampton Chelsea 1-2 Newcastle Arsenal 2-1 Leicester Aston Villa 0-2 Liverpool Man City 1-2 Spurs

Yep, me too. Lovely to see desire to get back, willingness to dig in, and full throttle sprint.

Yup, a lot more variety in our attacking play with Shelvey, Sissoko, Townsend and Gini. ... Spice of life. Now trying to think of Spice up your life lyrics featuring the above... I may be some time/don't hold your breath.

Unintended comedy gold. Alert Steve Coogan or Paul Whitehouse, SAYLOR is Alan Partridge (nearly typed Pardew!) meets Julio Geordio

Yep, not as depressing having to leave a sojourn in Benton, as it is leaving one in Bali

All scores to be confirmed by Magpie. Week 25: Another decent week scoring wise, our average score was 18.4; a couple of points higher than the average for the season . The highest scoring game again featured Arsenal and returned 109 points with ten correct scores, two of which were nominated/doubled-up. Chelsea v Man Utd also chalked 10 correct results (you jammy buggers! thought my 0-1 was looking good...) but no 10 pointers. It is also worth noting that it was a case of welcome to our world for Froggy, first time he’s predicted his team to lose (Man Utd) and they let him down/cheer him-up/generally mess with his head in the mode of our United. Stand out predictions this week, for me, have to go to POOT. Only player to predict a 2-0 Villa win (amid 12 home wins) AND only player to predict a 1-0 Spurs win (amid 25 home wins). Mention to Kaizero too who nominated his 2-3 Leicester Away win at Man City; well deserved 6 points. This was also my original posted prediction (along with a draw for the Makems...)—must take a leaf out of Ranieri’s book and stop tinkering! Lawro would have scored 22 points this week, and his guests, Dad’s Army actors, 18. Lawro’s total score would now be 450, on my reckoning. Making him third now, behind BeloEmre, who appears to have had another outstanding week: seriously impressive run of scoring The above, assumes that the first set of scores will be used from the players who posted two sets, and as ever relies on my adding-up; may need a slight tweaking after Magpie’s done his thing.

Two players with double entries on week 25.

Chancels are he will. OLD on a mo, he Con Go to London.

Best find another reason to be proud other than success. Even the Tino hat trick was so against the odds, real 'pinch me/ punch me in the face' time, (Dagga the blagga had them playing s****) I genuinely could barely speak at half-time. Plenty of reasons beyond current regime, shameful branding, and woeful occasional hope-raising performances' to be proud of supporting Newcastle United. Just can' t think of them at the mo!

It is funny though. Not even laughing into the void, a bit too high pitched, laugh or else you'll cry, funny. Just funny. Seven months of clammering for a centre back and a left back, and we find ourselves multi-million pounds lighter and possibly having to play Jack Colback's spotty little bro'...

This. Says Iron Mike... I agree btw, just found juxtaposition of MW praising ST funny, for some reason.

Man City 2-2 Leicester Aston Villa 1-0 Norwich Liverpool 2-1 Sunderland Newcastle 2-0 West Brom Spurs 2-0 Watford Stoke 0-0 Everton Swansea 2-1 Crystal Palace Bournemouth 2-4 Arsenal Chelsea 0-1 Man Utd Southampton 1-0 West Ham

A remarkably high scoring week! Congratulations to all (pretty much). Our average was 22.7 points, a new record. 20 players scored 20 or over; three of which hit the dizzy heights of the >30. There were 34 correct score predictions (5 of which were nominated/doubled-up to 10 points). 44% of our predictions scored more than 2 points; highest to date. We also picked 148 correct results, out of 270 guesses (55%); pretty damn good. Highest scoring game was West Ham v Villa, with 111 points. Everybody scored something on that game, with 24 of us going for a home win, the three who picked a draw still getting a point, and 12 of us picked 2-0, with two jammy buggers doubling-up. Whilst not an outstanding points total – by this week’s standards – hats off to sbnufc for being the only person to pick a correct result in the Arsenal v Southampton game (26 home wins and one draw). Lawro would have scored 16 points this week, beaten by his guest Felix White (...no idea either), who scored 17. The most popular guesses on BBC Sport Predictor, would have scored 22, and our group guess an impressive 27. Lawro’s total score would now be 428, making him joint third with BeloEmre, who has a cracking total for the last 5 weeks: 102 points (including a measly 6 pts in wk 21). He’s been pushed close by joeyt, whose ‘mid season push for Europe’ is still in full swing, leaving him now just three points behind Froggy, having collected 101 points over the last five weeks. The Toon are now 6th bottom (15th) of the most points returned league climbing above Chelsea, up to an almost respectable average of 44.2 points per game (involving them) just behind Leicester on 44.3ppg. Arsenal still top on 65.3 ppg.

Cunt soup.... yum! Though Cunt pot noodle = even better....

What a fucking knobber.

"Hey, Stevie! How come you're such a big hit with the girls?" "I got the moves baby, you got the motion, let's get together we'll be causing... causing... well, to be honest, causing an underwhelming, uninspiring, under confident, impact on seemingly decent footballers. Whoops!"

Says it all...