Kid Icarus

Bringing on Dele Alli just seems a bit sadist tbh

Really struggling to think of a more suicidal approach to a match than this one tbh. It's proper David Luiz still trying to take on the Germany team while 5-0 down levels of stupid.

DVDB escaping from the Texas Chainsaw Massacre house by getting into Ted Bundy's car.

Presumably Lampard's approach against us will be to double mark our danger men Emil Krafth and Chris Wood, leave ASM as the spare man, push up high because we don't have any pace, and put Dele Ali on Joelinton.

Holy fuck

Keane and the Everton defenders appealing for offside in open play in the age of VAR.

This match is all on Lampard like. As pathetic as their players have been, I don't remember our 08/09 wasters playing this well tbh. To me they're playing to Lampard's plan as best they can, it's just that the plan is suicide.

A sure sign that you're in a state when your top performer in a squad of big name players is the local youth player.

They did against Leeds last week

cOld man more like

Bielsa's watching this at home and shaking his head over Everton being too open.

Exactly. First 5 minutes it seemed like they might press well, but they'd never be able to keep it up, now they're already shattered. And why would you think playing that way against them might work for Everton but not Man City.

I honestly don't get what Lampard's thinking was here. Spurs are dynamite on the break and he's got his centre backs playing in Spurs' half

Oaaar noooaaar

Keane's always trying to steal the limelight from Maguire. Was he ever good?

1-0 Spurs

Everton look decent on the ball but they're being incredibly naïve here. Pushing high with Kane and Son on the break plays perfectly to Spurs' strength.

Didn't realise Salisu is a doubt, that's great news for us.

He's very basic, but he has a level of authority that I respect. I find it hard when lesser players are saying a better player than they ever were should do better, or when someone like Jenas implies someone has let the team down when he was spineless.

Gayle would absolutely go with well wishes from me like. Fantastic in our promotion season and although Clark's been terrible and I've never really rated him, I think long-term you have to say he's been a net positive for the club considering his form under Rafa. The list of outgoings should be longer than that, mind, but it's only March so we'll see.

The F-Tier MOTD lot for me. Stephen Warnock, Danny Murphy, Dion Dublin, Phil Neville when he was on. I'd probably include Mark Chapman now as well. The drop off in quality after Lineker, Shearer, Wright is massive.

Sky are about 3 steps behind with it all tbh. Authenticity is a huge part of the reason things like The Kick Off are popular imo and they actually have that with Neville and Carragher. MOTD's whole Wright/Shearer banter thing is authentic as well, so it just comes across as obviously set-up when they put Keane and Richards together as this a whacky/straight man comedy duo.

TG saying that ASM reminds him of Tino. Literally nothing alike.

Think people take it a bit too seriously tbh. Keane is often a risable, humourless person, especially when it comes to Man United. People watch him because he has that about him and laughing at him is a huge part of the appeal. Although Richards goes on like he's had a hot air balloon of nitrous oxide before going on air, they've obviously been put together as a bit of double act and to make light of Roy Keane's over the top cynicism. I'd be staggered if they weren't aware of it, or didn't lean into it. To me it seems obvious that Sky saw the popularity of Shearer and Wright's camaraderie on MOTD and tried to manufacture their own version of it. The only issue I have with it is that it's clearly inauthentic to me.