Miggys First Goal

This one.

This is going to be fucking mint.

JT been in Dubai the whole time? Jesus.

Burnley get Lionel Richie for their unveiling videos. We can only afford Sammy “the Skiver” Are we sure we’re rich?

Took them three days to record him opening his eye.

He wants to sack off his new agents if they’re this shit at getting deals done.

Maybe we’ve already sold him on.

What the fuck are they doing? Hey, Yankee Todd, want to sell Chelsea and buy us instead?

We waited 18 years for the bid to be accepted. We can wait another 18 months for it to be announced.

Heard Thumbheed was back at the club in some capacity. Probably running the media team by himself.

Looks like he’s under fire in some war-torn country in the Middle East.

Friday it is then. Will be a nice way to kick off the weekend.

Just seen Tripps in that Hii Fitness place just off Grandstand Road. Looked like he has the weight of the world on his shoulders.

Who was everyone’s favourite ITK on here? @Ando7 wasn’t it?

I chuckled

4pm today. Private from London. Must be Guehi’s representatives again.

Probably the same knacker.

Get Forest on the phone, they always deal with us. We can recoup some of that £55m we just gave them.

First three games on TV. We’re fucking massive.

Never doubted him. Ever. Except that one time. But never again.

Double plane nonce alert!

Can’t wait for the content. Video of Elanga meeting the King, tour of the training ground, Osula crashing his medical. Give it to me, Newcastle. Inject it.

Newcastle’s “smart” sale of Sean Longstaff to Leeds United for £12m would “cover off” the statement signing of Anthony Elanga from Nottingham Forest in PSR terms, enabling them to add a midfielder to their summer wish-list. The Magpies have made their first breakthrough of the transfer window with a £55m move for Elanga and are believed to be progressing on other deals. The Sweden winger landed on Tyneside on Tuesday afternoon to end Eddie Howe’s 18-month search for a right-sided forward – and inject further pace into an attack that will be spearheaded by Elanga’s compatriot Alexander Isak next season. With speed in transition, physical presence and Premier League experience, he looks like the perfect fit for Howe’s preferred system and insiders believe he is the right age to improve under a manager who has a habit of squeezing improvement out of new signings. But that headline signing is only part of the story at St James’ Park. Longstaff’s potential move to Leeds – interest having been first revealed by The i Paper back in April – would be a huge fillip for the club’s recruitment plans, even if the fee appears on the skinny side for a player with nearly 200 Premier League appearances. “If the Longstaff sale happens it’s actually a superb bit of business for Newcastle in their position,” Professor Rob Wilson, a football finance expert and programme director at the University Campus of Football Business, tells The i Paper. “As an academy product Longstaff would represent ‘pure profit’ for profitability and sustainability rules purposes so that adds another £10m onto their PSR calculations. Given the way amortisation works that’s enabling you to buy a £50m player on a five-year contract. “In laymen’s terms they’ve paid for the first year’s amortisation charge for Anthony Elanga in the blink of an eye. Selling Longstaff – even at that price – would mean their PSR ‘headroom’ is untouched and they can continue to invest in the squad. If they had £150m to spend before these two deals, they would still have that. “For a club like Newcastle, who need to watch their PSR situation and have been clear that it is influencing their thinking, it’s so important to have a player trading model and this would appear to be part of that.” Sources have once again told The i Paper that player trading is “absolutely pivotal” to Newcastle’s plans for the summer. While completing a deal for James Trafford remains at the top of the club’s agenda – further talks have been held this week – they are also looking to bring in a forward and centre-back. There is also the possibility of adding another midfielder to the squad to replace the experience of Longstaff, although the intention will be for Lewis Miley to get more minutes next season. The academy graduate is understood to be restless to get more opportunities after injuries partly limited his playing time last season. While Crystal Palace are among his admirers, Newcastle do not want to sell Miley and the potential departure of Longstaff would eliminate any pressing PSR issues. The Longstaff deal is not done yet, it’s worth stressing. While Newcastle are minded to agree the deal, there is still work to do on the player’s side. But Leeds see signing an experienced Premier League player at that fee as a great deal. Everton had shown an interest but are now looking elsewhere. Dominic Calvert-Lewin is also back on Newcastle’s radar, with the striker’s representatives having held talks with the club last week as they look to drum up interest in the former England international. But sources sought to play down the idea that he is prominent in Newcastle’s recruitment thinking at the moment, suggesting that despite Howe’s admiration for the striker Calvert-Lewin is just an “option” who might be returned to later in the transfer window. Newcastle want a forward who can both play with Isak and is also prepared to compete with him for a first team berth. The smart money, though, is that they sign a younger player with the versatility to play in other positions. Joao Pedro, their first choice for that role, signed for Chelsea and they may now cast the net overseas for an alternative.