Spider Jerusalem

Well, technically that is correct. It's just 14 games and some more games to play. It's just a bit like teaching Baldrick maths. All they know is they have 'some games' left if the number goes above 14.

Yes. In the same way that it didn't make them change the rules for the last qualifiers at the last minute to seed the teams. We've already been told there is no corruption in the game so that's the end of the subject.

Why the hell would Barton go there - he's more likely to be in a team passing them, laughing and pointing in May as they go in opposite directions.

Great penalty from Rooney there. I'm not sure what the worst part of today's game soundtrack is though. Owen's 'sandpaper for the ears' commentary, Man Ure's fucking woeful '12 Days of Xmas' shite or the diabolical Spud's slow-motion 'When the Spuds come marching in.

Excellent result today, and not just today but the whole month. The anti-November from last season. Well done to everyone at the club, well deserved as will the manager of the month award be.

http://www.thejournal.co.uk/news/north-east-news/agent-sues-shay-given-share-4466931

Just jumped up like a madman there. Is it right to dislike Liverpool this much

KK Kenny and Paul. Oh, sorry did you mean actual capable footballers and not just signing family members on decent contracts out of nepotism.

I was thinking the same thing. Unless the two photos to the right are her continued use after five years.

Which is why I've switched over to 'Dave'. Fucking sickening-

The debacle from November through January last season didn't shift him, losing the next three certainly won't.

Aye, some great 'let's all laugh at the lazy foreigner' coverage from Match of the Day

Picked the right team for the day and stayed brave with the substitution after the red card which was good to see. His big test is still to come though when Jonas is fit and available to see whether he has learned from the past year.

The target is to provide the oppostion to the big clubs for Sky and get the money from that and survive the season to do it again next year. Basically we've become the new Coventry City for the 2010s.

Pardew = Reek

Inevitable. Is this the reason he's sold the soul of the club to the money lenders?

Unfortunately he is, but that's not really praise for him to be fair.

All the reactions on the last page I'd thought they had scored

Still surprised he didn't make the starting eleven. We need a tackle on the field FFS.

Save us JFK

Listening to Pardew it's like there hasn't been a summer break. Still peddling the same shit excuses and refusing to see what is going on, or at least admit to it.

After one game, vs Man City away you shouldn't really be putting any predictions down for being relegated, but the simple facts are that it looks like nothing has changed from last season. We've got the same lifeless squad being led by someone who shouldn't be anywhere near a football team in any top league and turned up at one of top four with nothing but a hat-full of excuses before a ball has even been kicked.

There is another way, and it's more likely at the moment.

Did they actually give this commentary team a 'screen test'. Like a mixture of fucking sandpaper and a cheese grater for the ears.

It's not that hard to imagine to be honest.