BottledDog

FREDDY'S HEAD If schadenfreude is the malicious enjoyment of another's misfortune, then schadenfred is surely the malicious enjoyment of the many misfortunes currently being visited upon Newcastle's slimy chairman Fat Freddy Shepherd. Since the Jabba The Hutt-alike became chairman of the Magpies 10 years ago, he's consorted with fake sheikhs in Spanish knocking shops, admitted to ripping off his own fans, insulted the canine population of Newcastle by likening them to Geordie women, and plunged his club into debt while steering it from second to 19th place in the Premiership. It hasn't all been bad, though - while leading his club's plummet into the red on two fronts, Freddy's somehow managed to line his own pockets to the tune of £8.3m. Trebles all round! Today the under-fire chairman was in defiant mood as he pitched up at St James's Park promising to sort out the latest fine mess he's got Newcastle into. "Right now it would seem I am the only one prepared to do this job and it's one I will continue to do to the very best of my ability and with the best interest of the club at heart," he way-ayed, before heading to the training ground to give his players a piece of his mind he could ill afford. "I think it's time the players are reminded just who they are playing for," he continued, hoping that the sight of an obese, angry, slug-like life-form would be enough to shake Titus Bramble, James Milner and others out of their current torpor. Just two years ago, Fat Freddy told the Dubai Soccerex international football forum "there is no sympathy here" for teams attempting to survive outside the Premiership. It's small wonder, then, that there is no sympathy anywhere else for Newcastle's current plight. If they get relegated, the sound of raucous laughter nationwide will drown out the sound of them crashing into the Championship. But chances are, both Freddy and his football club will survive by sacking Glenn Roeder, appointing another "saviour" to much fanfare from the notoriously fickle and gullible Geordie fans, and then repeating the monotonous process once again this time next year. And the year after... - Gruniads Fiver

Could equally be said about Luque for us in Premiership terms. He admits he is not match fit and needs three games in a row to get there and I'm happy to judge how he performs after that, not on a few admitedly mediocre appearences dotted here and there. I'm not expecting him to pull up trees, but see less point in letting him hang out to rot when we are crying out for someone who has the ability to change a game by pulling a goal out his arse Robert stylee.

Huzzah, tis GOLD sir!

You make a good point there. You'd often get the likes of Shearer, Parker, Emre, Taylor, etc. coming out to the press saying everybody's behind the manager. Haven't seen anything of the sort for Roeder. Don't know where you get that from. Harper has been underlining the progress made Roeder and Pearce in regards to the defence recently while laying into players who show no heart, Butt has reiterated his desire to repay Roeder, and Ramage lauched a very passionate defence of him after the Palermo game for starters. I`m talking about more on the pitch, not the bits they are told to say to the press. When Souness was in the shite ( most of his tenure ) if we went down a goal to someone shite like Sheffield Utd you would see more urgency more mental strength. This may have been because Shearer was captain at the time or it may have been the players got more fired up under Cluelessouness. Agreed, my point was directed towards Optimistic Nut.

Or are they are simply telling it like it is? Something that the local rags (well the Chronicle in the main) seem incapable of doing.

GREAT article.

Giving Roeder way to much credit there. 'Carrsy' is one of Roeders 'special' players for a start.

Copy dan paste. What a steaming pile. It was the 'fans' who clamored for the defensive problems to be solved, it was fans that said the £15 million spent on two attackers could have been more wisely spread throughout the team. The same fans that still turn up week in week out as you so kindly point out, despite for years not seeing this all out attack bollocks you believe we so petulantly demand. Your friend Souness would have been cut even more slack if he was winning games Chelsea stylee, but he wasn't. He was sacked. Deal with it you fuckmuppet and stop spouting shite.

Old dog. New tricks. Down Shep.

You make a good point there. You'd often get the likes of Shearer, Parker, Emre, Taylor, etc. coming out to the press saying everybody's behind the manager. Haven't seen anything of the sort for Roeder. Don't know where you get that from. Harper has been underlining the progress made Roeder and Pearce in regards to the defence recently while laying into players who show no heart, Butt has reiterated his desire to repay Roeder, and Ramage lauched a very passionate defence of him after the Palermo game for starters.

Good to see them let it all out. bluewink.gif I hope that this bit - Relegation would be a complete and utter disaster - but if we have to go down in order to make the share price drop enough to see a buyout, then so be it. - is tongue in cheek though. We are all beating ourselves up here, but not even my most sadistic side believes that the phrase 'it might do us good in the long run to go down' is anything but balls. If relegated, with our debts and outgoings the club would be hammered, we would get stuck in the mire, and the only vultures to remain circling could well be just the Michael Knighton's of this world. Nothing is worth that... ...yet.

NUFC.com State of the Geordie Nation Part 87: Point of no return Ignoring Tuesday's Carling Cup sideshow, attention now switches to the away fixture at Manchester City next Saturday - the second time in ten months that we've gone there in turmoil off the field and in disarray on it. Our recent results mean that Pearce & Co.'s current inconsistencies are of little relevance - a situation also mirroring last season when a poor City side wiped the floor with the rabble Souness presided over for the final time. Whether an injection of attacking pace from Dyer and/or Martins can be added to our squad remains to be seen, but it's plain to see that the roots of our malaise lie far deeper. Quite frankly we've hit the buffers - and the problems that have been evident for years can no longer be ignored. Local heroes and club goalscoring records can no longer mask the decline in this club over a decade. For every person who boos or chants outside SJP there are many more mute onlookers and increasing numbers voting with their feet - unable to criticise their club but unwilling to witness this feckless tripe at first hand. It's bad enough paying for it, but for some season ticket holders at present it's too much of an ask to bother going, something that hardly bodes well for renewals. And as for away trips, forget it. A jaunt to the Arsenal ground and two nights on the slash in Germany. Going to Blackburn, Bolton or Everton holds about as much allure as brass-rubbing. The casual punters are drifting away week on week and there is a growing level of negativity and gloom from people who remember the dark days of 77/78 and 88/89 - and see unpleasant echoes of it in the current season. That negativity translates itself into a lack of support for the team. But to talk of a fear factor or a lack of confidence in the players as a consequence of that is just nonsense. Over-paid, lazy, disinterested so-called professionals aren't going to get away with the sub-standard performances of late that easily. There's a degree of sympathy for Roeder, who seems like a decent enough bloke fighting to do a job under intolerable circumstances - hence the lack of personal abuse directed at him. We can find nothing but contempt though from the rank and file towards the Halls and Shepherds, their offshore money pits, agent friends and car dealer hangers-on. Any talk from them about bad luck with injuries etc. has to overshadowed by the continual questionable transfer dealings and the feel-bad factor that now follows us around. While some fans publish calculations debunking the notion that the current administration have ever invested a penny of their own money into the club, more have grown bored of the bullish boardroom broadcasts and hackneyed platitudes trotted out by friendly hacks. But just as the Portsmouth or Palermo victories provided nothing more than temporary relief, so the Sheffield United game didn't herald the beginnings of a new dark age. Instead it merely confirmed the worst fears of many Toon watchers: that our post-Shearer recruitment programme was fundamentally flawed, leaving us ill-equipped to cope with the demands of this season. This isn't a knee-jerk reaction to plunging into the bottom two of the Premiership, rather a considered conclusion based on the mess we've made of a fixture list that included several eminently winnable games. Factoring in the coming games taking us into 2007 shows that it's a damn sight more difficult in terms of points collection. Conclusion - we're f*cked. A short-term approach would be to blame the losses on Roeder and point to tactical shortcomings, questionable selections and substitution and an inability to inspire certain players as reasons to pay him off. The appointment of a replacement (Curbishley or anyone of similar status, ie with nowt better to do) would then see that traditional new manager/ ten game boost take effect. That would give us enough renewed impetus to collect the points rise to the dizzy heights of mid-table. Throw in a dispiriting exit in the latter stages of a cup and the only thing that's changed is the price of the sorrow-drowning beers from the last time we went round the carousel. And from where we stand, people seem less and less prepared to stay on for the ride once again. In short, the club is dying on its feet; dying from neglect and dying of indifference. Look around - look at the mackems, look at Leeds. Remember mocking Murray, rubbishing Ridsdale and chortling at charver kids being pushed away from the Stadium of plight gates by stewards. Then look at us, look at the future. The last two relegations were accompanied by diversionary daftness - Dickie Dinnis and player power, then the original sack the board. And we nearly made it a hat-trick in 1992 before the McKeag era was finally banished, albeit sewing the seeds of our current malaise. Fans are desperate for a fresh approach, fresh ideas and fresh faces - anything to lift the mood of despondency that has set in since those scarves were twirled last May and Owen lay on a German football field just days later. The problem with not thinking short-term though is that a long-term view requires vision, planning and strategy. The current incumbents are yet to prove they have any of those qualities. To sum up, take your money and please just go away. Sack yourself. Relegation would be a complete and utter disaster - but if we have to go down in order to make the share price drop enough to see a buyout, then so be it. Let's at least try and restore some dignity, decency and unity to the club while there's still something worth fighting to preserve. http://www.nufc.com/

AFAIK, we don't own the land it's on, so who would want to buy it? Maybe Calimag could move it over to America block by concrete block, just like Arizona's London bridge? Would look smashing at the bottom of his garden just past the rockery. blueyes.gif

What a steaming pile. It was the 'fans' who clamored for the defensive problems to be solved, it was fans that said the £15 million spent on two attackers could have been more wisely spread throughout the team. The same fans that still turn up week in week out as you so kindly point out, despite for years not seeing this all out attack bollocks you believe we so petulantly demand. Your friend Souness would have been cut even more slack if he was winning games Chelsea stylee, but he wasn't. He was sacked. Deal with it you fuckmuppet and stop spouting shite.

Hmmm, struggle on until january to see Shepherd and Roeder spend more of our money on expensive toss and buy themselves more time until the next inevitable fall. Let me think..... No. Kindly fuck off.

A Ferrari won't necessarily stop an inept driver from crashing and burning/finishing last. Not that I think our sqaud is anything close to a Ferrari mind, more like a ford Galaxy with expensive hubcabs and a neon undercarridge. http://i80.photobucket.com/albums/j190/primesuspect1980/ricer.jpg Newcastle?

True Faith report now online. http://true-faith.co.uk/html/Matches/Reports/Reportsheffutd_h.htm Match Report Why? Why did we allow ourselves to be lulled into the naïve belief that confidence was permissible after Thursday? Why did Roeder look at a side that had gained easily our best result of the season and see fit to make six changes? Why was there a crushing inevitability about the ‘decision’? Why take the ‘soft’ option and drop Taylor and Ramage for Babayaro and ‘honest pro’ Stevie Carr? Why was the only contribution I witnessed from the latter a foul-mouthed tirade at a ball boy? Why are we always on average six inches smaller than any team we play? Why do we have no fight, no heart and no guile to break down teams that show the Premiership up for the garbage that it really is? Why are we no better (let’s stop kidding ourselves) than Sheffield United, Charlton or Middlesbrough? Why did we create nothing whatsoever for the first half? Why did we do the impossible and get even worse in the second? Why did we have not one chance, not one moment of excitement in the entire game? Why are we getting beat off the dross of the league at home? Why was Milner shamefully taken off despite looking like the only one that gave a toss? Why was Duff left on instead? Why was Duff bought? Why was Emre fit enough to play a full game on Thursday and be on the bench today and yet not fit to start? Why wouldn’t you just think ‘Fuck them’ if you were Albert Luque, or Steven Taylor or Peter Ramage or (and I can’t believe I’m actually saying these words) if you were taken off ahead of the stupifyingly inept Scotty Parker (God, this is going to hurt) - Nicky Butt? Why, if you were Alex Ferguson, would you let Guiseppe Rossi stay one minute longer in this car crash? Why was a kid who had the game of his life and brought a glow to our hearts with his hopelessly misplaced unbelievable post match interview that had us grinning from ear to ear dumped out of the squad today? Why couldn’t the players see the heartbreaking support pouring out in the second half and do something to even come close to deserving it? Why was this game played today after a few hundred grand was dangled in front of the board, regardless of the detriment to the team? Why does the man who is supposed to be running our club think that this is a good time for a jolly little break in Mallorca? Why do certain players at our club think it is acceptable to carry themselves in a frankly disgraceful manner off the pitch (no names, draw your own opinions)? Why do we look to the bench and see a joke of a coaching team headed by a failure of a manager? Why don’t the local press do their duty and tell the truth about NUFC? Why isn’t the utter revulsion of Shepherd being reported? Why has this happened? Why did my Dad walk out before the end for the first time in 50 years of supporting NUFC? Why don’t you just fuck off Shepherd and take Roeder with you? Shepherd Out! Keep the Faith – You can have both! GH

Amusingly HTL's post two or so years ago was based on a post made by myself 2 weeks prior. Strange but true.

I think you should name names.

Newcastle disease? DIAGNOSIS Gasping and coughing Drooping 'bingo' wings, dragging legs, twisting of the head and neck, circling, depression, inappetence, complete paralysis Partial or complete cessation of goal production Crosses are misshapen, rough-shelled, thin-shelled and contain watery albumen Greenish watery diarrhoea Swelling of the tissues around the eyes and in the neck PREVENTION AND CONTROL Strict isolation of outbreaks Destruction of all those infected and exposed Thorough cleaning and disinfection of premises Proper carcass disposal Aye, sounds about right.

Next issue "We would like to apologise for saying last week that Shepherd immediately tells us when he doesn't like what we've written. He phoned last night to demand that we retract this statement, which we do unconditionally and with our sincere apologies."

Fair play to him, seems like he he made some craking points. Hope shepherd was getting an earful, wherever the fuck he was.

And? All I care about is that the people in charge need to buck up their ideas and change things and/or fuck off. As has been sadly proven in the past, we have no influence on the decision, and all this speculation on who we might bring in just strikes me as depressingly pointless.

Agreed. Good on Parker for telling the fickle bastards to fuck off, if he did say that. Fucks sake, sodding great attitude that like.