Northern Monkey

Erm, what about Bolton? Or Villa? When the f*** will we stop pretending that we can ognore the beatings off bigger teams, whilst making up other excuses for our peers - and inferiors - also humbling us?? We took 4 points off Bolton monkey. You must have missed that. Still despite having our worst ever premiership season we're still above that rabble down the road eh ? If it wasn't for them breaking all kinds of records (again) we could be in the s***. That should cheer you up, does it ? Did you see the Bolton home game? Was that good enough for you? Oh, aye, i'm over the moon that we are JUST above SUnderland in the league table. Thats exactly what I expect from a club with our support, resources, infrastructure etc. If you're not happy with the present situation Monkey - then imagine how most us us on here must feel ! Why would a bunch of predominantly non-Geordies feel any worse than me? because pain has no regional borders Bollocks, tbh. But my view on people supporting clubs from places they are not from is not likely to be well-recieved in an internet forum full of peopel who support a team from a place they are not from.

Joe Cole. Read the title of the thread, for fucks sake. Who would you like to see brought in, Monkey? Or are you going to shoot down everyone else without offering a suggestion of your own? All i meant was, the title is "realistic". If anyone thinks that Joe Cole coming here is realistic, then they are even stupider than some daft cunt who constantly harps on about an-alleged (althoguh primarily made up) fanboy thing.

Joe Cole. Read the title of the thread, for fucks sake. Who would you like to see brought in, Monkey? Or are you going to shoot down everyone else without offering a suggestion of your own? Why change the habit of a lifetime? Well considering he rates Taylor and Milner and was a Scott Parker fanboy when he was here it'll be interesting to see what quality of player he'd like to see come here. You keep trawling out the Parker thing, and its getting dull, tbh.

Joe Cole. Read the title of the thread, for fucks sake.

Erm, what about Bolton? Or Villa? When the f*** will we stop pretending that we can ognore the beatings off bigger teams, whilst making up other excuses for our peers - and inferiors - also humbling us?? We took 4 points off Bolton monkey. You must have missed that. Still despite having our worst ever premiership season we're still above that rabble down the road eh ? If it wasn't for them breaking all kinds of records (again) we could be in the s***. That should cheer you up, does it ? Did you see the Bolton home game? Was that good enough for you? Oh, aye, i'm over the moon that we are JUST above SUnderland in the league table. Thats exactly what I expect from a club with our support, resources, infrastructure etc. If you're not happy with the present situation Monkey - then imagine how most us us on here must feel ! Why would a bunch of predominantly non-Geordies feel any worse than me?

Carr? One of the worst defenders we have? Why, oh why, would we do that? And please god don;t base it on 3 decent games out of the 100+ he's played for us.

Most people will probably just say "He's Martins - not Ronaldo or Anelka. But better than Smith so get him in. Most? Maybe. But there'll be enough pathetic cunts on here making stuff up about who wants him.

You haven't seen either play, really, have you.

Offer what they paid for him and hope he's home sick, it's a starting point and probably our only selling point to him. I think we as fans are looking at the fallacies of the club entirely wrong, i dont doubt for one second that money needs to be spent, but the figures being bandied about are ridiculous, we need to be aiming for the top half before we go looking for Europe, its about expectation and the higher we raise the expectation the more sensitive the trip wire becomes. Personally i would be happy to see the club cement a top half finish before we go making proper strides into the top 6/7. If we go about spending huge amount of money, and only achieve a top half finish, what effect does that have on the club and its fans? Personally i dont think it'd be particularly healthy. We havent seen a team yet play anywhere nears its potential, i dont buy into this the whole squad is shit, deep down everyone at this club knows that there are some excellent players at this club, we need to be punching our weight at present. Look at the effrect that heavy investment had on Tottenham, it needed a set up to get them flowing inthe right direction, and they are now in a posotion of power because of it, i genuinely belive that brining in 7-10 new players will do more damage than good. I just still think this talk of heavy investment a bit kneejerk, i know we are in a very poor position, but we have had a stupid run of fixtures, i genuinely belive that this club could be transformed with 3-5 max, players. Who are the 6-8 first team players who are good enough, for you? And what happens when one of them gets injured, or two of them, or three. Our "first team" players are supposed to be: Given - flaky, still top 6/7 for next season/one after? Probably. Beye - Seems pretty good, not a brillaint defender. Top 6/7? Yes. Carr - Fuck off. 6/7? Fuck off. Faye - only an idiot thinks he's a "beast" so far. Seems alright, needs to iron a few errors out. 6/7? Hopefully. Taylor - has a number of things to iron out, imo can become a good defender. 6/7? Hopefully. Cacapa - vastly over rated. 6/7? No. Enrique - unclear whats happened to him. Not a good buy, it seems. 6/7? No, not on showings so far. Duff - weak, doesn't drive forwards, ineffective. 6/7? No. The Zog(at left wing) - our best left winger by a country mile. 6/7? Yes. Barton - Has been poor, pretty consistently. Also scum. 6/7? On current showing, No. (and please fuck off). Butt - fuck off. Geremi - fuck off. Milner - not the fastest, but not as slow as some would have us think (no slower than Solano, really). 6/7? Hopefully. Smith - rubbish. Rubbish in the middle. Rubbish up front. 6/7? No. Owen - Past his best, not arsed, not fit, no service to him. Still clearly has ability, but not world class by a long chalk. 6/7? Yes. Martins - Very, very flawed. Extremely fast, but its no good making random runs. 6/7? Possibly. Viduka - Slow, fat. lazy. Well past his best. 6/7? No. So, imo, what we have is: YES x 3 (ST, LW, RB) PROBABLY x 1 (GK) POSSIBLY x 1 (ST) HOPEFULLY x 3 (CB, CB, RW) NO x 6 (CB, LB, LW, MC, ST, ST) FUCK OFF x 3 (RB, MC, MC) We WERE mid table crap for the past few seasons. Allardyce put things in place to bring us down to the level we now are. We do not want to be looking for mid table safety next season, we need to be looking to get back to the top 6/7 without delay. And to do that, we need some serious investment. Mind, anyone who thinks we can prise the likes of Carrick away from teams like Man Utd is an idiot. We need to look at what teams like Citeh have done with their buying, or get a great manager in. I'd go with all of that NM, with the caveat that Zoggy will end up in the full French side soon. More than capable of that, if he gets played where he should be. If he doesn't, i think we'll lose him. And it'll be OUR loss, not his.

When Martins comes back: Some people will (wrongly) say he is top class, good enoguh for the top 4, etc. Some peopel will say (even more wrongly) that Arsenal/Man Utd/another bigger club than us are after him. He'll be really good in some games, and awful in at least as many others.

Erm, what about Bolton? Or Villa? When the f*** will we stop pretending that we can ognore the beatings off bigger teams, whilst making up other excuses for our peers - and inferiors - also humbling us?? We took 4 points off Bolton monkey. You must have missed that. Still despite having our worst ever premiership season we're still above that rabble down the road eh ? If it wasn't for them breaking all kinds of records (again) we could be in the shit. That should cheer you up, does it ? Did you see the Bolton home game? Was that good enough for you? Oh, aye, i'm over the moon that we are JUST above SUnderland in the league table. Thats exactly what I expect from a club with our support, resources, infrastructure etc.

Offer what they paid for him and hope he's home sick, it's a starting point and probably our only selling point to him. I think we as fans are looking at the fallacies of the club entirely wrong, i dont doubt for one second that money needs to be spent, but the figures being bandied about are ridiculous, we need to be aiming for the top half before we go looking for Europe, its about expectation and the higher we raise the expectation the more sensitive the trip wire becomes. Personally i would be happy to see the club cement a top half finish before we go making proper strides into the top 6/7. If we go about spending huge amount of money, and only achieve a top half finish, what effect does that have on the club and its fans? Personally i dont think it'd be particularly healthy. We havent seen a team yet play anywhere nears its potential, i dont buy into this the whole squad is shit, deep down everyone at this club knows that there are some excellent players at this club, we need to be punching our weight at present. Look at the effrect that heavy investment had on Tottenham, it needed a set up to get them flowing inthe right direction, and they are now in a posotion of power because of it, i genuinely belive that brining in 7-10 new players will do more damage than good. I just still think this talk of heavy investment a bit kneejerk, i know we are in a very poor position, but we have had a stupid run of fixtures, i genuinely belive that this club could be transformed with 3-5 max, players. Who are the 6-8 first team players who are good enough, for you? And what happens when one of them gets injured, or two of them, or three. Our "first team" players are supposed to be: Given - flaky, still top 6/7 for next season/one after? Probably. Beye - Seems pretty good, not a brillaint defender. Top 6/7? Yes. Carr - Fuck off. 6/7? Fuck off. Faye - only an idiot thinks he's a "beast" so far. Seems alright, needs to iron a few errors out. 6/7? Hopefully. Taylor - has a number of things to iron out, imo can become a good defender. 6/7? Hopefully. Cacapa - vastly over rated. 6/7? No. Enrique - unclear whats happened to him. Not a good buy, it seems. 6/7? No, not on showings so far. Duff - weak, doesn't drive forwards, ineffective. 6/7? No. The Zog(at left wing) - our best left winger by a country mile. 6/7? Yes. Barton - Has been poor, pretty consistently. Also scum. 6/7? On current showing, No. (and please fuck off). Butt - fuck off. Geremi - fuck off. Milner - not the fastest, but not as slow as some would have us think (no slower than Solano, really). 6/7? Hopefully. Smith - rubbish. Rubbish in the middle. Rubbish up front. 6/7? No. Owen - Past his best, not arsed, not fit, no service to him. Still clearly has ability, but not world class by a long chalk. 6/7? Yes. Martins - Very, very flawed. Extremely fast, but its no good making random runs. 6/7? Possibly. Viduka - Slow, fat. lazy. Well past his best. 6/7? No. So, imo, what we have is: YES x 3 (ST, LW, RB) PROBABLY x 1 (GK) POSSIBLY x 1 (ST) HOPEFULLY x 3 (CB, CB, RW) NO x 6 (CB, LB, LW, MC, ST, ST) FUCK OFF x 3 (RB, MC, MC) We WERE mid table crap for the past few seasons. Allardyce put things in place to bring us down to the level we now are. We do not want to be looking for mid table safety next season, we need to be looking to get back to the top 6/7 without delay. And to do that, we need some serious investment. Mind, anyone who thinks we can prise the likes of Carrick away from teams like Man Utd is an idiot. We need to look at what teams like Citeh have done with their buying, or get a great manager in.

Erm, what about Bolton? Or Villa? When the fuck will we stop pretending that we can ognore the beatings off bigger teams, whilst making up other excuses for our peers - and inferiors - also humbling us??

We won't go down. Mainly because of the existance of Derby, Reading and Fulham. But, if we maintain with the fucking pathetic delusion that Duff, Smith, Barton, Butt, Viduka, N'Zogbia (at lb) are good enough, then we'll never even get past mid table again, next season or any other.

Given 4 - Poor Beye 4 - Poor. Clearly better going forward than indefence, but WE NEED A DEFENDER! Faye 4 - Poor, but scored. Caught out pf postion a remarkable number of times. Taylor 3 - As Faye,but no goals. Zoggy 4 - Poor. STOP PUTTING HIM AT LEFT BACK! You shoudl have bought one. Milner 5 - Onlyone fucking trying. Butt 3 - Shit. Barton 2 - Shit. Duff 4 - Poor. A sad, sad shadow of a once decent player. Smith 2 - Fuck. Off. Owen 3 - Granted, he has very little opportunity due to the utter wank of his team mates. But come on, we're getting fuck all here.

Cacapa?? You never, clearly, actually try to watch our ganes properly.

Absolutely hilarious.

That shouldn't matter, even if true. What he does for 90 minutes of a game is the only thing that should matter. However, as he ahsn't been pwt to write hoem about, despite the increasingly desperate-sounding protestations of some fans, why shoudl he be played.

Well, he's been crap everywhere else he's played for us, so maybe we COULD give him a go at LB.

I'd like to think that had I not been "lucky" (an arguable point, given our shitness), and been born somewhere else, i'd support that team. One of my best mates is from Grimsby. He supports Grimsby. Its not about their chances of winning anything (obviously!), its about where he is from.

Actually I do agree with some of that. It always seems strange if you are born and bred in England not to support your local team, but it's a slightly different issue to overseas supporters. Having said that, while I could never support an Arsenal or a Man Yoo, I'm always pleased if supporters from other parts of England support the toon. That makes them part of my gang as it were. How could you resent anyone for such an admirable quality? I don't resent them, i just don't agree with the concept. Like i said, the foreign fans is different (although I DO resent it when domestic or foreign fans watching on TV make pronouncements about games and assume that you get a "better" idea of the match than actually being there), especially our american chums, and more understandable. But if i came from Holland, i'd support my local Dutch club firdt and foremost. Its just the way I am, and the way I think things should be. I am from Newcastle, so I support Newcastle and England I don't see the need to have any "other" clubs beyond that.

I like Taylor. I really think he can become a really good player (although he clearly has faults now), given the right players around him. Faye hasn't been as rock solid as some on here woudl like to portray (typical NUFC fans attitude to new players), but he's a good player by all accounts, and mayeb he and Taylor can flourish together. Simply put - none of our defenders, especially the centre backs - are going to be as good as they can be until the whole back four is settled.

So it;s wrong to think that people should support the club of the place that they are from. Fantastic. In my opinion - and i know that my opinion is not particularly well-thought of, but 'meh' - it's not about people being "glory hunters", thats clearly not the case (although i think we did attract some when the first Keegan reign looked like it was going to produce something) at Newcastle. I just genuinely don't understand why anyone woudl want to support a team from somewhere that they are not from (or have a strong familial link to). With foreign fans, its probably more understandable, what with the all-pervasive coverage (and undeniable quality) of the Premiership, but lets face it, its by-and-large an arbitrary decision to support NUFC for these fans. And thats what i don't get, i suppose - the arbitrary nature of SELECTING a team to support. For me, its an almost tribal thing - its about where you're from, not the selection of a team because of certain players/managers/strip colour or whatever. But hey, I'm clearly a bad person for thinking that way.

He just likes a whinge man. Leave him to it Mind your fucking business, then.

Yes, because scoring in one game, would definateky make a player good enough, he would prove himslef to be a star then, eh. Not at all, but it would be nice for him to say, "My last two goals for Newcastle have been against Manchester United and Juventus." It still wouldn't make him a premiership quality player. Even Shambles had the odd decent half a game, and he was ball-achingly shite. She just said as much tbh. Aye, we should play our resaerves and youth players in the Premiership, even if they clearly aren't up to it. After all, all we need is passion and committment.