DJ_NUFC

This absolutism, obsessive focus on seeing things in a black or white and not being able to even see or acknowledge the greys when it comes to not just Mourinho but a myriad of topics, is one of the many reasons that I've concluded that Ronaldo is, in fact, a troll. Or there must be something wrong with him.

Will there be an appointment with 8 games to go like last time? JFK back in it!

This guy needs to be hounded out. Good thing is that even a hint of a #sackcarver or #carverout campaign will see him crack like a hundred year old Chinese egg.

I wish you'd stop calling people who disagree with your ridiculous views names. But we all have our flaws, right.

Even if everyone in China rolled their eyes at this, it wouldn't be enough. Succeeded to fail is the most galling part. As though his acheivements were nothing at all except a lost title race Unfortunately that's the view of a lot of Newcastle fans who are too young to remember, there's a lad on another forum who hates Keegan and keeps trying to compare Pardew with Bobby Robson. Basically the entire Geordie stereotype stems from those era's which they never got to experience first hand and there's a lot of resentment because of it so they make it their mission in life to prove that they're this grounded fan, the one sane and sensible geordie floating above the sea of delusion so they follow the general nationwide view (bottled the title, quitter, look at that video man get a grip etc) in order to fit in. Or maybe that lad on the other forum is just genuinely insane, he did come out with this gem just one week ago; "Also, I've been a season ticket holder for 10 years, and I genuinely can't think of many better CB's than Mike Williamson Newcastle have had in that time. - Seriously he's currently 4th." Dementia rates recently gone through the roof on Tyneside or what?

Aye exactly. Like hiring someone as your personal financial advisor on the basis that they'd previously won the lottery and therefore knew their stuff. It's basically been the case from the start. He hasn't necessarily made better financial decisions than Shepherd, he just had the money in the bank to cover his back when he lost the club a fortune by getting us relegated. Shocking how many people's memories have been slowly altered over time by the regime, and they forget that it was these cunts who got us relegated in the first place by their catastrophic mismanagement of the hierarchical structure at the club. Appointing real estate goons and used car salesmen in roles which have never made any sense in English footballing history, and then fucking about majorly with the managerial role. Fuck the lot of them. It's amazing how well their propaganda machine has been winning though, Ashley must be part of the dictators' conferences where keynote speakers like Kim Jong Un and Stalin give lessons in PR.

Carver'll fix that.

Can't wait for his next pundit gig, when's he on telly next?

Name-calling notwithstanding, you've now pedaled back from "one hell of a centre back" to "take him any day over Willo, marrah!" Anyways, nobody is saying he's not better than Willo, all we took exception to was the aggrandizement of his supposed potential. At least personally-speaking, I reserve adjectives like "one hell of..." for special players who have shown something extraordinary or above average. Like I said, if he carves out a decent career as a regularly-starting premier league CB, he and most of the fans will be pleased with how his career would've panned out. Currently even that is looking unlikely. And take your name calling somewhere else as nobody was being aggressive or defensive in this discussion.

You're kidding me. With the right coaching, partner and plenty of time, he can become an adequate, average, regular Premiership defender who can start a few games on the run and deputize for better CBs when required. There is absolutely fuck all to suggest he would be come "one hell" of anything. Just compare him to other "one hell" of CBs his age, and you'll find names like Woodgate, Rio and MYM, who in flashes looked miles beyond their years at that age. Dummett has always looked like there is an average, mediocre player in there somewhere. We need to be a little more realistic here and aim a lot higher when it comes to snagging quality CBs for our club.

Gosling wasn't the club captain costing us stupid goals for 3 consecutive seasons, though. I only get vaguely wound up when his abhorrent fan club on here defend the indefensible instead of just putting their hands up and admitting their hero is actually quite shit. I'm not defending my irrational hatred of Gosling in any way. Although he was simply the embodiment of Pardewism, as was Shola / Gouff on the wing, etc. We need two new CBs, and give Abied a run in the team, asap.

I imagine Ronaldo and College Dropout's universe going completely red with the siren-theme from Kill Bill filling the air every time Colo and Cisse are mentioned, respectively. I was kinda the same way about Gosling, so I do understand.

Good point about Bassong. Pity we went down that year

When was the last time he was paired with an actual decent partner who can complement his weaknesses, though? Other teams extend the usefulness of their CBs and strikers by having a much quicker player next to them. Our policy has been to pair him with absolute shite, and sell the best young defender we've had at the club in ages to Roma.

Where's him calling Bobby's spirit now? Suddenly everything's turned Pardew, very quickly. I wonder if SBR would be patting himself on the back with those stats.

I'll just let that one hang there for a second... 6 out of 18. That's 38 across a perfect season. FYP.

I don't even know where to start or what to pick apart. Just have to laugh at this point.

Have you been following what's been going on with us since 2008?

Bailed out and yelled at by Janmaat a couple of times today.

It's been atrocious watching us since Carver took over, somehow worse than under Pardew. The players either don't give a fuck or seem lost, confused. Our attacking play has to be the worst in the league, there is no cohesion, no plan, no connection between players. And what of our non-existent midfield? Can't remember a single time we took the game by the scruff of the neck.

That's fucking awesome

John Carvery with his best material in the last few pages. Some really hilarious / shocking reactions from some of the others as well, mind For whatever reason, this thread just had me in stitches.