magorific

Thank f***. Now do one Pardew, you useless, slimy, rat-faced mong.

Hoofball isn't Carroll's game, though. King Kenny had Carragher and co lump it at him last season, and look what happened. Carroll needs accurate, early delivery from wide areas. Are we equipped to give him that?

Thought his derby display would more or less put the debate about his all-round contribution to bed. Sadly not. He's one of the least of our worries. Anyone who can't see that actually deserves what we're all getting.

Total embarrassment of a day, from start to finish. Selection of Gutierrez at left-back was lunacy and cowardice - classic case of a fear-driven manager's arse finally dropping. How Jonas is even near the first XI after the season he's had is a joke. Bringing Shola on to herald hoofball from half-time was another panic move. No hiding place for Pardew now. For us to be still embroiled in a dogfight post-January signings and with most of our "better" players fit HAS to be held against him. He's clearly getting no insightful input from the men around him. But again, who's fault's that? Christ knows whether we stick or twist right now...

We didn't play hoofball when Carroll was on the up here, we just got the ball out wide and then quality early delivery into the box from there. Whether we've got the players to provide that type of delivery now is open to question...

Pretty sure the City one is next season's training top.

Massively unlucky not to score with that near-post effort. I'd be far more worried if he wasn't getting into scoring positions, but he is.

What. The. F*ck?

Tiote is unmanageable...

Haidara seriously off the pace, and Santon dozing again.

Strange to think Saylor was the anti-christ to many on here not so long ago. Fair play to the lad for the turnaround.

So, this debate about Cisse's all-round contribution...

For such a limited player, he doesn't half end up in a lot of goalscoring positions...

Feck off! Swansea did f*** all for 40 minutes of the second half! nowt to do with laudrup - we outplayed them, missed easy chances and they got a scruffy goal at the end Don't let common sense cloud your judgement. Laudrup is 347563457324956 times the manager Pardew will ever be and he should be managing us!!!!11!!!!!!! Not on the evidence of that game. Laudrup got lucky, and you're a tool. Your lack of comprehension for sarcasm makes you look the tool, like. Comprehension "of", not "for". Tool.

Aye, Mbiwa too tbh. Worried about us defending from balls into the box full stop. How many free headers did they have?

Feck off! Swansea did f*** all for 40 minutes of the second half! nowt to do with laudrup - we outplayed them, missed easy chances and they got a scruffy goal at the end Don't let common sense cloud your judgement. Laudrup is 347563457324956 times the manager Pardew will ever be and he should be managing us!!!!11!!!!!!! Not on the evidence of that game. Laudrup got lucky, and you're a tool.

Feck off! Swansea did f*** all for 40 minutes of the second half! Spot on. They were gash. Which makes the result even more of a p*sser.

Far, far less dangerous than the Swansea challenge.

Another joke of a referee. Brian Little can also f*** right off.

Nani doesn't seem to be in SAF's first team. When talking attacking players that aren't strikers. It's Mata, Bale, Fellaini, Cazorla, Michu. In the slightly lower performing bracket it's Hazard, Walcott, Lennon, Silva based on this season. HBA hasn't played enough or scored/assisted enough to belong in that top bracket, arguably hasn't played enough to be in that second category. At the moment, he's Bryan Ruiz, Nasri status due to the injuries. Stop, start, season. Hasn't "grown" much at this point this season. Still there's loads of games left. Bryan Ruiz??? Injuries or not, HBA has produced considerably more than him. Ask fans of ANY opposition club who they rate higher..

Half a yard my arse. If that's half a yard, I'm packing 18 inches...

I've never seen a post saying that Cisse isn't trying hard enough. I think 99% of people on here recognise that he just needs a couple of goals to get him going again. Straw man. A couple of goals like tonight, you mean. No, ones which are given. He'll be even more frustrated now. Which of course you understand. My point is that he's clearly back in form - beat the offside trap three times, finished well twice. On reflection, reckon it'll be a confidence booster for him. You understand.

Only beat it - decisively - three times tonight.

I've never seen a post saying that Cisse isn't trying hard enough. I think 99% of people on here recognise that he just needs a couple of goals to get him going again. Straw man. A couple of goals like tonight, you mean.

Just watch the chance Bale missed in the first half tonight. He's shite him...