I can't describe how I feel when I watch Newcastle nowadays. I used to watch the club because I really gave a shit; the highs were amazing under Keegan and Robson, and the lows in between were painful but still hopeful. Even under Gullit I never stopped loving the club; even when the football was piss poor and the managerial decisions were mortifying... I still watched every match, and I still felt passion, and I still believed in the players on the pitch; because even though at times they really were piss poor, I still felt like they cared, and I could still identify with them. Even on the night of the 2-1 home defeat against Sunderland, I didn't come anywhere close to what I feel watching the team lately.
Even under Souness we were shit, but there was Shearer and Bellamy up front, and Robert on one wing and Nobby on the other, and no matter how badly they played I always gave a shit because these blokes were fucking heroes who had delivered more than their fair share of absolutely heart-stopping moments of delight in their Newcastle careers (even if said careers were coming to an end), and they warranted support. They forced me to give a fuck. They earned it.
Nowadays I look at the likes of Martins, Owen, Butt, Smith (every player in our squad, basically -- just to save me the hassle of listing them), and I just can't identify with them... They're not heroes; they haven't done anything to earn admiration. All they've earned from me is apathy, at best. Abhorrence would probably be more fitting of them though, for what they've done to the club. You can blame owners, managers, coaches, banners and whatever else you may wish, but the players are what it really comes down to. The tactics may be wrong, the coaching may be poor, the leadership may be terrible; but none of those things excuse heartlessness. These are professional footballers. They should be able to motivate themselves playing under the guidance of a fucking three-legged cow when they are in a relegation battle.
They are gutless, and watching Newcastle nowadays is no longer hurtful or painful, it's completely and utterly alien -- like watching a sequel to your favourite movie which is released years after the first, and realising that the story has changed, it has new writers and a new director, and most importantly, the heroes that you loved so much in the first movie have been replaced by bumbling idiots. The only thing that remains similar is the title, but that alone isn't enough to make you give a shit about it.
If we'd been relegated under Gullit, Souness or Roeder, I would have been absolutely gutted; devastated; heartbroken... Right now, towards these players, I just don't feel that way. This isn't the Newcastle United Football Club that I grew up watching, it's some fake, distant imposter of a club, and while I still feel a twinge inside my mind which says "BE SAD NOW", the instruction feels forced and logical rather than emotional.
Anyway, that's just my two pennies worth on our plight, since I agreed with BooBoo's sentiments... I shall slink back to the safety of the Lost thread now.
